


Baby We Could Be Enough

by lovelarry10



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Adoption, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Bath Sex, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Harry is 20, Kissing, Louis is married to a woman, M/M, Mpreg, Mpreg Harry, Mutual Pining, No smut between Louis and his wife, Past Harry Styles/OMC - Freeform, Past Relationship(s), Pining, Pregnant Harry, Pregnant Sex, Protective Louis, birth scene, but don't worry, emotional harry, labour and birth, louis is 23, natural birth, please give it a chance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-14 00:48:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 74,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16029542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelarry10/pseuds/lovelarry10
Summary: Harry Styles has always wanted a family, but his boyfriend doesn’t. When an unexpected pregnancy leaves Harry feeling alone and terrified, he feels he has no choice but to give up his baby. He finds a family with the adoptive parents, and maybe something more.~Louis Tomlinson and his wife, Jess, have been trying for a baby for years. Their hasty marriage after they first got pregnant has only led to a series of miscarriages that have put a strain on their already precarious relationship. When they meet a young man desperate for a home and someone to raise his child, Louis realizes that he may have been moving in the wrong direction all along.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dont_Stop_Larry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dont_Stop_Larry/gifts).



> This is based on this prompt, I hope you like it!  
>  _Pregnant teen Harry Styles searches for a couple to adopt his oncoming baby and thats what leads him to Louis and his wife/husband, Louis is super excited and takes Harry to his doctors appointments and to birthing classes through out his prengancy which leads to the pair falling in love._
> 
> I also gifted this to Liz. I struggled with the prompt, but she basically came up with the entire outline for this fic, the plot and where it was going. It's been a joy to write from, and I hope you love it too, although I know you've been reading it as I write haha :) Thank you for all your help and support and encouragement along the way.

 

Harry paced nervously around the apartment he lived in with his boyfriend Steve. He glanced around the room, pleased at how neat and tidy it looked. He knew it had to be perfect because tonight, he was going to tell Steve something that Harry wasn’t sure how he would take. There were fresh cut flowers on the windowsill in the vase Harry had bought a few years ago when Steve had bought him his first bunch of flowers, the scent of the fresh blooms already permeating their home. Harry had hoovered everywhere, plumped the cushions on the sofas, and there was a shepherd’s pie in the oven, Steve’s favourite dinner.

Harry stopped as he heard a key in the door and hurried into the hallway, welcoming Steve with a hug and a kiss. The man leaned into the kiss, but pulled away, sending Harry a puzzled look. He looked him up and down, taking in the fluffy curls atop Harry’s head, and the red blush on his cheeks. 

“You okay, love?” he asked, and Harry nodded eagerly, trying to stop his feet turning in as they did when he was nervous. If he didn't cover quickly, he’d be found out and Harry couldn’t afford for that to happen until he was ready. Steve’s blonde hair shone in the light of the hall, and Harry hugged him again.

“Yeah, I’m all good. I, um, I made your favourite for dinner, shepherd’s pie,” Harry said shyly, but he didn't miss the big smile on Steve’s face. Harry reached and took Steve’s hand, leading him into the kitchen, sitting him down at the table. He’d set it nicely, a pale cream linen tablecloth draped over it, a candle in the middle burning brightly, and their finest plates out. 

“What’s this for?” Steve asked, clearly puzzled. Harry just smiled to himself, heading to the oven to remove the dish with his oven gloves, quickly dishing up the food onto the plates Steve brought over for him, thanking him with a kiss on the cheek.

“Just wanted to do something nice for my lovely boyfriend,” Harry said, carefully heading over to the table and putting the dishes down, steam swirling off the food in front of them. “Enjoy.”

“Thanks, love,” Steve said, tucking in to the meal. “So how was your day?”

“Um, good, I think,” Harry said. He’d had a busy day at college, and then the discovery when he’d gotten home after lunch had thrown him a bit, but he wasn’t about to make that known. Not just yet. “Yeah, good. Yours?”

“Busy. Work is just shit at the moment, so much going on and we just don’t have enough manpower to cover it, so I may have to start pulling some extra shifts to cover. I don’t want to, Haz, but needs must. The other guys need to see the bosses are pulling their weight, too.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” Harry spoke softly, resting a hand on top of Steve’s on the table. He swallowed down the last of his meal, his heart now thundering in his chest at the revelation he was about to make. He was excited, no doubt about it, but he was hopeful Steve would react in the same positive way too. He cleared his throat and scooted his chair across, sitting directly in front of Steve. “I have something to tell you, babe.”

“Okay.” Steve dabbed at his lips with the linen napkin Harry had put on the table and faced him, looking down when Harry took his hands for a moment, running his thumbs over the backs of his hands, where some heavy tattoos were inked into his skin. “What is it, you’re making me nervous.”

“Shit, sorry. I’m nervous too,” Harry began, heading over to the side and grabbing a silver box. “This is for you… well, for us, I guess? But yeah…”

He watched as Steve lifted off the lid, his expression not changing when he saw what was inside. He picked up the end of the white plastic stick and held it in the air, frowning at it. Harry hoped he couldn’t possibly misunderstand, because the word was in the little window, but still, he watched with nervous eyes as Steve turned it over before his eyes flickered up to meet Harry’s.

“Is this a joke?”

“A joke? What- why would it be a joke?” Harry answered quickly, fiddling nervously with his fingers. “I- I’m pregnant, Steve.”

“Shit,” Steve said, putting the pregnancy test back into the box and setting it on the table, running his hand through his hair. “How? I- I thought you were on the pill, and we use condoms…”

“I don’t know,” Harry said with a shrug. “But I’ve been feeling sick for a while, so I thought I’d do one in case, and, well, I’m pregnant. I know you never really wanted kids, but maybe this is a sign that we can do this?”

“Yeah, maybe. I’m going to take a shower.” Steve pushed back from the table, walking past Harry without looking at him, leaving the box abandoned on the table. Harry felt devastated as he was left alone again. He brought his hand up, resting it on his belly, no evident sign of pregnancy there just yet. But the fact Harry knew he had new life growing inside him was enough.

“He’ll come round. Your other daddy will be fine once he comes to terms with the fact you’re here, don’t worry, love. Until then, you’ve got me.” Harry smiled and rubbed his hand over the flat muscle, thoughts of having a big, round belly in just a few months flooding his mind. 

If he was honest, Harry had always wanted a family of his own. He’d known he could carry children since he was a teenager, and even when Steve had broken the news that he wasn’t particularly paternal and didn't see children in his future, Harry had remained positive, sure that in a few years time, Steve would change his mind and they could settle down and have the children Harry always dreamed of.

Now, though, an unexpected pregnancy had thrown a spanner in the works. Steve was right. They did use condoms every time they had sex, and Harry was on birth control, so really, he couldn’t fathom how this could have happened. Either way, it had and this baby was coming, like it or not. And Harry did like it, very much.

He loved the idea of having a baby in his belly, of raising them, holding them while they slept. Harry had always loved kids, and now he was having one of his own. He felt sure Steve would be fine once he started to show and realised that the baby was part of him and Harry. Steve loved him, therefore he’d love their baby too. Right?

*****

The next afternoon, Harry let himself into their small flat, dumping his heavy rucksack on the floor in their poky hallway. He kicked off his boots, rolling his sore ankles before he called out, wondering if Steve was still here or if he’d left for his shift already.

“Babe? You here?” Harry hollered, silence greeting him. He sighed, realising he’d missed him since he’d left Steve in bed that morning, kissing his forehead before he’d slipped out of the door, determined to give his boyfriend a lie in. That had meant he’d had to walk the two miles to college rather than getting the lift Steve usually gave him, but Harry figured the exercise would do him good, especially now he was pregnant.

But now he’d had to walk the two miles home as well, and he was sure he would pay for it later. There was a dull ache in his lower spine, already sore from years of back problems, and now his feet hurt too. If things were this bad this early on in the pregnancy, he dreaded to think what it would be like when he had a big belly, and was waddling around. Harry couldn’t help but smile at the thought, already eager to get to that stage.

He wandered through to their bedroom after downing a large glass of water, remembering that he wanted to do some laundry last night, but he’d fallen asleep before he could get around to doing it. He flipped open the lid of the laundry basket and frowned. The level of it was much lower than Harry remembered it being that morning when he’d dumped his pyjamas inside, and as he dug through, it seemed only his clothes were in there. He frowned and pulled opened Steve’s cupboard, heart-stopping when he saw only empty hangers inside.

He whirled around and looked at the bed, seeing a folded piece of paper on Steve’s pillow, his name scrawled on the front in Steve’s typically messy handwriting.

“No, no, no,” he muttered, unfolding it with shaking hands as he perched on the edge of the mattress, nausea rising throughout his body. His eyes filled with tears as he took in the words on the page, one dripping from his chin and making a mess of the ink, smudging it slightly. Harry’s hands trembled as he read to himself.

_ Harry _

_ I’m sorry. I just can’t do this. I told you when we got together I didn't want children, and I meant it. I don’t think you set out to get pregnant or anything, but now you are, I don’t want to be part of this anymore. I’m not asking you to get rid of it - I know how much you want children, but I want nothing to do with it. I’m sorry. _

_ Steve _

Harry screwed the paper into a tight ball in his fist, lobbing it across the room in anger before he sat up, staring at the now empty cupboard in front of him. That was it. He was alone, just him and his baby. He wasn’t in contact with his parents, and now the only person who had supported him was gone. Harry had felt sure that once Steve let the idea settle in his head, he’d want the baby, and a family with Harry. But no. As usual, the people who claimed to love Harry just left him.

It wasn’t long before Harry was crying, collapsing onto the bed and clutching Steve’s now redundant pillow, weeping. He’d never been so scared in his life, and now it wasn’t just himself he had to worry about. There was a little human inside of him that was relying on him for life, and Harry wasn’t sure what more he had left to give.

He sat up after a little while, throat sore and eyes red from all the tears. He sniffed and grabbed a tissue, wiping his nose before he picked up his old phone, pleased to see the battery hadn’t depleted fully yet. He pulled up his contacts, settling on the one he needed before he pressed it, holding the device up to his ear.

“ _ Strawberry Hill Surgery, how can I help you _ ?”

“Yes, hi, I’d like to make a prenatal appointment with a doctor, please?”

“ _ Certainly, and your name _ ?”

“Harry Edward Styles.”

*****

Louis’ feet pounded on the linoleum of the hospital corridor as he ran, screeching to a halt at the main reception desk. The woman sat behind it looked up in alarm at the noise before reschooling her features, looking at Louis.

“Can I help you?”

“Um, yes. I’m looking for the maternity wing?”

“Follow the pink line on the floor, sir, and please, no running.”

“Sure, sorry, thanks,” Louis bumbled before he headed off, walking as quickly as he could, trying to ignore the stitch in his side. He came to a stop in front of a set of double doors and pressed the buzzer, waiting to be called in.

“Can I help you?” came a tinny voice through the metal speaker on the wall.

“Um, I think my wife is here, Jessica Tomlinson?”

“Yes, come on in.” There was a low buzz and a clunk, and Louis pulled the door open, stepping through. He was greeted by a nurse in a navy dress, who pulled him to one side.

“Mr Tomlinson?” He nodded, trying to catch his breath again. “Come with me, please.”

She led him to a side room, the door closed, and the window blind pulled down. He sighed, knowing what this meant. He’d been here before, too many times not to know. “Oh god.”

“I’m really sorry, sir. Your wife was asleep, but please go in. The doctors will be around to check her out later and discharge her home into your care.”

“Sure, okay. Thank you so much,” Louis said, taking a deep breath before he headed inside. Jessica was curled up on the bed on her side, facing away from the door. Louis closed it with a soft click and walked around, taking a seat in the padded chair next to the bed. Jess’ cheeks were red and tear-stained, but when he reached out to take her hand, she snatched hers away, tucking it back under the blanket.

“I’m sorry, love,” he said softly, pushing a few tendrils of hair back from her forehead, trying to ignore the way she flinched under his touch. “I came as quickly as I could, I was in a meeting and they didn't tell me until I got out-”

“It’s fine,” she said in a low voice, not meeting Louis’ eyes. “Nothing you could’ve done anyway. Thought we were safe this time, never made it to eleven weeks before-” she started crying again, and Louis got up and sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing her back as she wept for yet another lost baby. Their fifth. “I want to go home, Lou.”

“Soon, sweetheart. The nurse who met me said the doctor will come and speak to us soon, and let me take you home. Think they just need to make sure you’re okay, the bleeding has stopped and all that.”

“I know the drill, Louis. This isn’t my first miscarriage,” she bit back, rolling away from him again. He stood again and sat back in the chair, turning his out-of-office on in his email account so he wouldn’t be disturbed before he tapped out an email to his boss, saying he’d be out the rest of the week with Jess, briefly explaining the situation.

Around half an hour later, a kind doctor came around and spoke to the pair, running through the aftercare that they’d heard too many times before. Louis helped her change from her hospital gown into the clothes she’d worn here earlier, throwing the blood stained knickers in the bin before she could see them and start crying again.

They headed out to their car in silence, and Louis opened the door, helping her inside before he drove home. He pulled up on the gravel driveway and watched as Jess got herself out, stalking up to the front door which she opened with her key, heading inside without even waiting for Louis. He sighed and grabbed his bags as well as Jess’ things, and closed the door behind him.

The afternoon was spent in silence. Jess stayed in their bedroom after having a shower, and ignored any attempts Louis made at consoling her, despite the hurt he was feeling inside too. It was only when he went to bed that night that she began to talk, finally voicing the words that had been on the tip of his tongue all afternoon as well. Somehow, it made him feel better that she was the one outwardly voicing it. That it was her giving up, not him.

“I don’t think I can do this anymore, Lou,” she whispered softly into the darkness. “I can’t keep going through this. My body hurts, my mind is a mess… it’s like an emotional rollercoaster that I can’t get off. I… I think it’s time we faced facts.”

“What do you want, Jess?” Louis was sat up against the headboard, Jess turned away with her back to him as always. Louis loved his wife, he was sure of that, but at times like this, he wondered if she truly loved him. She made no attempts to touch him or be intimate unless she was ovulating, and it hurt. Even so, he’d tried to make things work as best he could, even when he felt his heart wasn’t in it either. Now, though, he needed to hear her say it.

“I don’t want to try and get pregnant again. That’s what I’m trying to say.” Louis nodded, having expected that to be what she suggested. “My body obviously can’t carry babies to full term, and it’s cruel to keep trying.”

“So… what were you thinking?” He had had a few ideas about this but for some reason, he felt nervous approaching his wife with them. She was emotional at the best of times, let alone now.

“I don’t know. Adoption, maybe? Fostering? I just know  can’t do this anymore. I’d rather have a baby that isn’t ours biologically than go through this pain every few months.”

“I understand. If that’s what you want,” Louis replied, reaching out a hand, willing Jess to take it, which she did. “I’m sorry I can’t give you what you want. I’m sorry we can’t have our own baby. I wanted it, more than anything. You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know. It’s not your fault, and it’s not mine. It’s just one of those things. But hey, we have a lot of love to give a baby who needs a home, right?”

“Course we do,” Louis agreed, pulling the quilt up enough that he could slip down inside. He didn't bother to try hug Jess, knowing his attempt at affection would be rebutted anyway. “Night, Jess. If you need anything, any painkillers or whatever, let me know.”

“Thanks. Night, Louis.”

“Love you, Jess.” Louis waited but no reply came. Louis just sighed and rolled onto his side so he and his wife were back to back. He had to admit that this wasn’t what he imagined his life to be like at just twenty three; married and in a loveless marriage that at this point felt like a marriage of convenience more than anything else.

*****

“You sure about this?” Louis asked, taking Jess’ hand, despite her reluctance to hold his.

“Yeah, Louis. I think this is the only way, don’t you? We’ve both decided not to try and get pregnant ourselves, and I want a baby.”

“Me too,” Louis agreed, picking up the phone from the table in front of him. They’d spent a few weeks talking after the miscarriage, with even their GP advising it wouldn’t be the best thing for Jess to try and get pregnant naturally again. No-one could give them an answer as to why Jessica couldn’t seem to carry a baby past the first trimester, but given the strain it was putting on her body, and on their marriage, they’d come to the conclusion that enough was enough.

They’d looked into fostering, but Louis had honestly admitted he couldn’t bear the thought of getting attached to a child and having them taken away when a permanent home was found. They’d then turned to adoption, and after many hours spent scouring the internet and reading copious books, they’d decided to apply to be adoptive parents to their local agency. Now it was really happening, though, Louis felt nervous.

He keyed in the number onto the phone and put it onto speakerphone, Jess holding his hand like a vice as it rang several times. His heart stopped when a voice cut through, looking over at Jess.

“Good afternoon, Vita Adoption Agency, you are speaking to Sarah. How may I help you today?”

“Hello. Um, my wife and I were wondering how we would go about applying to be adoptive parents please?”

“I can certainly help with that. Firstly, we’d like to schedule an appointment for you to come in and meet us and have our initial assessments completed before we begin the process.”

“That sounds fine,” Louis replied, Jess nodding at his side. This was real, it was happening.

“Fantastic. Could I take your names, and I’ll take a look on the system and work out when our first available appointment would be.”

“Jessica and Louis Tomlinson.”

*****

“No, Rashid, I did not pick up that fucking file, I told you that!” Louis thumped his fists on his desk, getting more than a bit angry by now. Work had been stressful all week, and he had been struggling to keep his temper under control. It had been a bad few months for Louis at home as well, and all the stress was mounting up, and it felt like he had no escape. “Seriously, mate-”

“Sorry Louis, um, there’s a phone call for you on line 4?” Mandy, one of the floor’s secretaries hovered nervously in the doorway and Louis felt guilty immediately. Usually, he was known as the kind, friendly one that people could come to and chat with, share their worries or a funny joke or whatever was on their mind. But lately, people had been giving him a wide berth, and Louis hated that.

“Sorry, love. Put it through, thank you so much.” She smiled and walked away, the red light on Louis’ office phone flashing. He cleared his throat and had a sip of water, picking up the handset and starting to speak. “Good afternoon, this is Louis Tomlinson.”

“Oh hello, Mr Tomlinson. My name’s Athena, I’m calling from Vita Adoption Agency. I apologise for calling on your work number, but there was no answer on your residential number or on your mobiles.”

“Oh, I’m really sorry about that, my wife is at work, and so am I. Neither of us are allowed our personal phones with us during the day.”

“Not a problem, I understand entirely. I apologise for us not having been in contact with you before now. We’ve had a shortage of parents putting their children up for adoption, so unfortunately, there has been no news to share with you.”

“It’s fine, we understand completely. We assumed we would hear when there was something, so we’ve just been going on as normal since we got the paperwork confirming our assessments were all approved.”

“Good to hear, Mr Tomlinson. Now, I am calling because I do have an update for you. We actually had an expectant parent come in a few weeks ago, and they’ve been seeing our team about putting their baby up for adoption. The parent is currently eleven weeks along, and is looking for a couple to adopt their baby. You and your wife are actually the best fit, so we were contacting you to talk through the possibility of arranging a meeting-”

“Oh my gosh, wow. Um, I wasn’t expecting this-”

“Mr Tomlinson, slow down for a second, please. This adoption is a little… different to our usual set up. The birth parent has requested to meet any potential adoptive candidates before they agree to the adoption. It’s actually not against our rules, but obviously, you are free to say no if you wish, it’s an entirely personal decision. Either way, your answer will not affect any future adoption possibilities that may arise.”

“Okay, wow. That is different. I obviously need to talk through with Jess- with my wife, so can I get back to you tomorrow? We won’t lose our place in the queue, so to speak, will we?”

“Most definitely not. We completely agree you need to talk this through with your wife, and actually, we can give you five days to get back to us. After that time, if we haven’t heard from you, we will pass the opportunity along to the next couple in line.”

“I assure you I will get back to you within that timeframe,” Louis insisted, keen to get across he was most keen about the idea. Whatever happened, he hoped that he would be able to convince Jess that this would be a great idea, that meeting the birth parent of their potential baby could only be a good thing. He’d love to know what the biological mother was like, if only to get a glimpse of how his future child may turn out.

“Excellent. Well, thank you for your time Mr Tomlinson, and please do give me a call as soon as possible. Have a good afternoon.”

“You too, and thank you again. Bye.” Louis hung up and exhaled. He felt excited at the possibility of finally moving forwards with their adoption, and he hated the fact he couldn’t contact Jess to let her know the news. He glanced at the small silver clock on his desk, seeing he still had two and a half hours left of work before he could even contemplate going home.

He clicked a button on his computer, bringing the screen back to life and reluctantly opened his email inbox again, sighing at the sheer amount of unread emails in there. He clicked open the first one and began to reply, weariness setting deep in his bones.

*****

“Jess? You home?” Louis called out, neatly lining up his shoes next to her high heels in their entranceway. He could hear her banging about in the kitchen and shrugged off his jacket, hanging it on the coat rack before he wandered through, feet chilly on the tiles of their hallway. He had a sudden thought that when their baby started crawling, he’d need to buy a load of rugs to cover the hard floors. He quickly shook that thought away as he arrived in the kitchen, going up behind his wife and kissing her cheek. “Hey, love.”

“Hi yourself,” she said, smiling at him. “Had a good day?”

“Actually, yeah I have,” Louis confessed, unable to wipe the smile off his face. He hopped up onto the counter, ignoring the flick of the tea towel that landed on his thigh when Jess walked by, collecting up the things she needed from the fridge to make dinner. “Ooh, is it fajita night?”

“It is,” she confirmed, standing next to Louis as she started prepping vegetables, slapping Louis’ hand when he tried to steal a few pieces of pepper. “So what’s made your day good, then? Usually you come home with a face like a smacked arse.”

“Oh thanks,” he scoffed, quickly snatching a piece of carrot while Jess’ back was turned. “Well, it’s not actually work related. Um… I got a call from the adoption agency today.” Jess’ knife stilled and she slowly turned her head, meeting Louis’ eye for a moment. Louis could see she was holding her breath, and he decided to carry on and put her out of her misery. “It’s not a baby. Not yet, anyway. The, um, the lady at the agency had a bit of a proposition for us, actually.”

“Well, don’t fucking wait, Lou. Tell me.” She’d given up the knife completely now and was biting on her thumbnail, looking at Louis with nervous eyes.

“The mother wants to meet us. Apparently, that’s a stipulation in their adoption agreement, that they meet us before they agree to possibly allowing us to adopt their baby. It’s up to us whether or not we agree, but if we don’t, it doesn’t affect any future adoption possibilities. So… I guess we need to talk about it?”

“Wow. Okay. Is that, like, legal?”

“Apparently so,” Louis nodded, getting down and putting a frying pan on the hob, ready to cook the chicken. “It’s not against their policy, anyway. What’s your gut saying?”

“Honestly? I think it’s odd. But at the same time, I kinda get it? I mean, if I was handing my baby over to strangers, then I’d want to know they’re good people. I hate the thought of being judged, but I…”

“Kind of want to do it?” Louis filled in, and she nodded, looking nervously over her shoulder towards him. “Me too. I don’t like the thought of someone deciding yes or no on meeting us, but if that’s what they need to feel better about what they’re doing, then I guess we can give them that.”

“So will you call tomorrow and set it up?”

“Sure.” Louis’ tummy was filled with butterflies at the thought of finally meeting the person whose baby they might adopt, and he felt nervous, hoping whoever she was would like him and Jess. They were hard-working, both young and in a stable home, so Louis couldn’t see a reason they wouldn’t like them. But you never know. “I’ll set it up for as soon as possible. You think you’d be able to get time off work if we needed to?”

“Definitely, Karen will understand. I’ll explain what it’s for without going into too much detail.” Louis pushed the diced chicken off the chopping board into the pan, jumping back slightly as it started to sizzle. “Turn the heat down, Lou…”

“Sorry,” he mumbled, fiddling with the controls on the hob , ignoring the giggles coming from Jess as he tried to cook. “Hey, if I’m gonna be a dad, I’ve gotta learn how to do this cooking shit, right? I can’t bring up a kid on Coco Pops and Pot Noodle alone.”

“Damn right,” Jess laughed, bumping hips with him as she turned around, moving the pieces of chicken around with a spatula. “Lou…”

“Mmm?” Louis replied, turning his head to look at his wife.

“This is happening, yeah? We’re going to do this?”

“We really are,” he said, opening his arms for Jess to step into, rubbing the back of her head as she rested it on his chest. “We really are.”

 


	2. 11-15 weeks

Louis pushed open the door to the agency office, and looked around the neat area. In front of them was a dark wooden counter, lots of leaflets and magazines littering the top to one side, and there was a slightly lowered section where Louis could see a woman sat with a headset on. She was talking, evidently on a call and smiled to Louis, indicating she’d noticed him. He called Jess over and sat down with her, waiting patiently for the woman to end her call.

When she did, she stood up, and smiled, Louis getting to his feet. “Mr and Mrs Tomlinson?”

“That’s us,” Louis said, shaking her outstretched hand firmly.

“I’m very sorry about that, it was a client on the phone, and my colleague has stepped out of the office so I had to take it..”

“Not a problem, please don’t worry,” Louis assured her, looking over his shoulder to check Jess was okay. She was staring out of the window, a faraway look in her eyes, and Louis frowned slightly, wondering what was up with her. She’d been fairly quiet since they’d woken up that morning, and had refused sex when Louis tried to initiate it. In the end, he’d just gotten out of bed and made them both breakfast, ignoring the fact it had been about three months since he’d gotten so much as a kiss out of his wife.

“Okay, so our client is due soon so if you wouldn’t mind coming and waiting in one of our family rooms? It just gives us a little buffer between them arriving and you meeting.”

“Of course, whatever you need,” Louis said. He stepped over to Jess and held his hand out, his wife taking it as they followed the lady, Shelley, back to one of the rooms. Louis was impressed when they walked in. It was painted in a soft green, and there were two large dark blue squishy sofas lining two of the walls. There was a coffee table in the middle with plenty of magazines and books on, a TV in one corner, and a small basket full of toys in the other corner. It was a cosy room, and Louis immediately felt at ease. “Wow, this is lovely.”

“Thank you. We wanted a space where everyone could feel comfortable, less like a meeting room, more like a home from home,” Shelley said softly, indiciating to Louis and Jess that they could sit and get comfortable. “There is a little kettle just on that table over there, and a sink with drinking water so please help yourselves. Hopefully we won’t keep you too long.”

“Honestly, we’re in no rush. Just take your time, and the, um, mum too,” Louis said, feeling a little awkward. Shelley smiled and headed for the door, closing it behind her.

“You okay?” Louis asked, sitting down next to Jess. She nodded and picked up a magazine, starting to flick through the glossy pages, the sound of turning paper the only one in the room. Louis sighed and settled against the back of the sofa, crossing his legs, flicking through his phone and his Twitter app for a while until their meeting began.

Around twenty minutes later, there was a soft knock on the door. Louis’ eyes flew open and he looked to Jess, who looked as nervous as he felt. She shoved the magazine onto the table while Louis put his phone on there too, standing up and smoothing down his shirt, while Jess stood and adjusted the hem of her dress, pulling it down as far as she could. Louis took her hand and smiled softly at her, the pair squeezing hands as the door started to open.

Shelley entered first, a small smile on her lips. “You ready?” she asked, and both Louis and Jess nodded. What happened next took Louis’ breath away. Instead of the young woman that Louis had been expecting to walk in, a tall, handsome young man walked in, a slight bulge prominent under his dark t-shirt. His hair was held back by a navy headscarf, and he had ripped jeans on. Louis could see they were slung low on his hips, and he assumed that was thanks to the burgeoning baby bump he could see.

He was aware he was staring but somehow he couldn’t help himself. The boy was beautiful, and looked so young and nervous. Louis doubted there was much of an age gap between them at all but still, he wanted to look after this boy. He cleared his throat and stepped forwards, wanting to suddenly take charge of the situation and make everything as comfortable for him as he could.

“Hi, I’m Louis Tomlinson, this is my wife, Jessica.” Jess stepped forwards, shaking the boy’s hand as well. He smiled shyly, and Louis couldn’t help but notice the little dimple in his cheek as he smiled.

“Hi, um, I’m Harry Styles. Thank you for agreeing to meet me.” He gestured with his hands as he spoke, and then shoved them nervously in his pockets, as if he didn't quite know what to do with his limbs. Louis pointed at the other sofa.

“Please take a seat, we’d love to chat with you, that’s what we’re here for, right?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Harry chuckled, lowering himself carefully onto the sofa. Louis watched as his hand went protectively to his belly, rubbing gently as he looked over at Louis and Jess, clearly still very nervous. “Um, how are you both?”

“We’re good, love. How are you?” Louis hated that Jess wasn’t speaking but he wanted to help this boy feel at ease as much as he could. “Everything okay with your baby?”

“Yeah, I think so. You can ask me stuff, if you want, I mean. I don’t really know what to say, I’m a bit nervous. This is my first meeting, so I’m not really sure how this should go.” He shrugged and grabbed a cushion from next to him, clutching it against his torso.

“Okay, well if we ask something you don’t want to tell us, just say. We won’t be upset,” Louis began, keen to put the boy at ease. “I’ll start. Oh, and if you want to ask us anything, please do. We’ll be as open with you as we can.”

“Sure,” Harry said softly, nodding, his curls bouncing around on top of his head. “Um, okay, how old are you both? Have you been married long?”

Louis looked to Jess, who just nodded to Louis, telling him wordlessly she wanted him to answer. “Well, I’m twenty three, and Jess is twenty two, although she’ll be twenty three in a couple of months. We’ve been married two years now. How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“It’s fine, I just turned twenty,” Harry said, nervously playing with a ring on his finger. “Do you live nearby?”

“Not far,” Louis began, shuffling forwards, hoping his body language was open and friendly. Harry seemed so closed off and nervous, and Louis wished there was more he could to do to make him feel more comfortable. “About ten miles in the car. I work in Manchester, so a little bit of a commute, but Jess works about ten minutes drive from our house, so that’s not so bad. I’m considering a bit of a change, actually, so we will see how things pan out.”

“I’m about half an hour’s walk from here,” Harry spoke again. “We have- sorry,  _ I  _ have a little flat, it’s not much but it’s home.”

“And do you work?” Louis prompted, hoping Harry wouldn’t mind the prying questions.

“I’m at college two days a week. I work full time the other days.” Harry’s eyes remained on his lap as he spoke, and Louis wished he could do something to bring the boy out of shell somewhat.

“That sounds cool. I kind of always thought I’d end up in teaching, but things change,” Louis said with a shrug. “Probably had enough experience with my million siblings growing up, but there you go. You have any family around, Harry?”

“No.” Harry’s low tone caught Louis’ attention and his head snapped up, noticing the blush high on Harry’s cheeks. He quickly changed the subject, much to Louis’ relief. “So what jobs do you guys do?”

“I’m a writer for a local magazine and Jess is a legal assistant at a local solicitors,” Louis explained, starting to feel frustrated that Jess wasn’t speaking up. Louis noticed that Harry was now leaning forwards slightly, listening intently as he started to speak, which encouraged Louis to keep going. “I like my job, but I hate being stuck in an office. I’m much more of an outdoorsy person, I guess.”

“Yeah, me too,” Harry said, and Louis loved the way his eyes lit up when he smiled and got excited about something. “I love the park. Makes me feel calm.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Louis nodded in agreement. “So… can we ask you about the baby?” Harry nodded at that, a hand resting on his belly again. Louis looked to Jess, widening his eyes, telling her to speak.

“Um, how far along are you?” Jess said, her voice very timid and quiet, even in the silent room.

“Just over eleven weeks,” Harry said, adjusting his t-shirt so his bump wasn’t so visible.“I, umm ... found out at six weeks. And then my ... I mean, stuff happened.” Louis watched as Harry’s hands twisted in his lap, and it pained him not to reach out and comfort him. He looked terrified. “What about you, though? Did you just not want ...” he trailed off, looking at the floor, and Louis shared a glance with Jess.

“We tried,” Jess spoke quietly, looking down at the floor. “I’ve been pregnant five times. But… things just didn't work out. I couldn’t do it anymore, the pain of losing a baby, so we’ve decided to try this. This is kind of our last shot, I guess. I don’t mean with you, but at getting a child in general. If adoption doesn’t work out…” she tailed off, not quite knowing how to end the sentence.

“I’m really sorry,” Harry said, reaching out to take her hand. “I can’t imagine how hard that must have been. You must hate people like me who get pregnant, and give their babies away.”

“No, not at all-” Louis hurried to say, but Harry cut him off, his voice slightly shaky.

“I’m really sorry.”

Louis looked up and saw tears welling in Harry’s eyes. He stood up and grabbed the box of tissues from the table, going to sit on the other sofa, next to Harry, rubbing his arm in what he hoped was a comforting manner. “I’m sorry we made you upset, love.”

“It’s okay,” Harry sniffed, dabbing at his eyes with the tissue. “I just… it’s not easy. Any of this.“

“Don’t worry, we understand,” Louis said, returning Harry’s wobbly smile. “Is there anything else you wanted to ask us?” Harry just shook his head, clutching the tissue in his fist. “I think we’ll let you go then, love, if you’re ready?”

“Thanks,” Harry mumbled, getting to his feet and smoothing his t-shirt out over his belly, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by Louis. “Um, s’been nice to meet you both.”

“You too. Take care, love,” Louis said, resisting the urge to hug the young man in front of him. He smiled as Jess slid her hand into his and pulled her close, leaving the room and Harry inside. He turned back before the door closed and saw Harry sigh and slump back on the sofa, rubbing his hands over his face. He wondered how Harry had come to be in this position, pregnant and having to give up his baby when Louis wasn’t entirely sure it was what he really wanted to do.  “So, what did you think?” he asked, turning to Jess.

“He was nice. A bit young, perhaps, and quiet. Very shy.” She kissed Louis’ cheek before she slid into the car, pulling her seatbelt across her body as Louis got in, starting the engine. “I think he liked us though, from what I could tell. You were good with him, Lou.”

“Just hate seeing people upset,” Louis mumbled, indicating and pulling out onto the main road. “It’s a lot to deal with at any age, but he’s so young. I’m guessing he’s on his own, and that’s never easy either. At least through everything, we’ve had each other.”

“Yeah…” Jess continued to stare out of the window as Louis drove towards her office, dropping her off and waving as she walked inside, professional as always. Louis turned and started the drive to work himself, not really keen on going into the office after an emotional morning. For some reason, he couldn’t get the pregnant boy out of his mind, and even hours later, sat typing up a new article at his desk, Louis knew even if the boy didn't choose himself and Jess to adopt his baby, he wouldn’t be forgetting him for a while.

*****

It was two weeks later that they received the call. It was a Saturday morning, and Louis had been unable to sleep. He’d got up and threw out the takeaway dishes littering the kitchen table from the night before, had mopped the kitchen floor and was sat on the sofa with a blanket thrown over his legs, something mindless on the TV in front of him that he wasn’t paying attention too.

The home phone ringing loudly disturbed his peace and he swore under his breath, leaping over the back of the sofa to grab the handset, hoping it hadn’t woken Jess up. He caught his breath before he spoke into the receiver.

“Hello?”

“Oh, is that Mr Tomlinson?”

“Yes, it is, who’s calling please?”

“Hello, this is Shelley from Vita Adoption Agency. Sorry to be calling early on a Saturday morning…”

“Not a problem, I was awake anyway. How are you?”

“Very well, thank you. I had a phone call from Mr Styles last night, and he wondered if you and Mrs Tomlinson would be able to come and meet with us today? We were thinking around midday if that works?”

“Of course we will be there, I hope everything is okay?”

“It’s fine, this is just at Mr Styles’ request. We will see you both later on. Bye bye.” Louis hung up the phone and glanced at the time on his watch, happy to see it was only 9am and therefore he had plenty of time to get ready. Clearly Harry obviously had some other questions that he needed to get answers to before he could make a decision, and Louis was willing to answer anything he had to to help Harry and his baby.

He went upstairs and showered, shaving his beard and sorting his hair before he went into the bedroom to wake Jess. She was still sound asleep, her dark hair fanning around the pillow as she slept. Louis perched on the edge of the mattress, placing a hand on the smooth expanse of her back, shaking slightly.

“Jess, wake up love.” She started to stir and rolled up, smiling sleepily up at Louis. “Um, we had a call a little while ago, the adoption agency. Harry wants to meet with us again. I said we could, if you’re free?”

“I am, for sure,” she said, sitting up and adjusting her top slightly, making sure she was covered. Louis wasn’t sure when Jess had started caring about him seeing her naked but either way, it was just another thing that had changed between them lately. Louis got up and walked over to the window, pulling back the curtain as Jess got out of bed, scurrying off to the bathroom while Louis’ back was turned. He grabbed some clothes from his wardrobe and pulled them on while Jess was busy and headed downstairs, making her a cup of tea and some toast while she dressed.

A few hours later, they were pulling up the agency. Louis had put on a light blue shirt with a black jacket and trousers, and Jess had on dark blue skinny jeans with a red jumper. She’d lost weight, Louis thought as they headed in, and he smiled at Shelley as they approached the reception desk.

“Nice to see you both! Mr Styles is actually here already if you want to come through?” Louis nodded and held out a hand, indicating Jess could go first. They walked quietly up the corridor and were led into the same room as before. Harry stood as soon as they walked into the room and smiled shyly at them, and Louis noticed how his toes were turned in, his long legs encased in the tight denim of his jeans.

“Hey, nice to see you again,” Louis said, stepping over with an outstretched hand, smiling warmly at Harry as he took it, shaking softly. Jess did the same before sitting down, Louis quickly joining her. “How have you been, Harry?”

“Yeah, good, thanks,” Harry mumbled, reaching up to tuck a tendril of hair behind his ear. He didn't say anything more and again, Louis felt that urge to take the lead in the conversation.

“So, you asked to see us?”

“Yeah, I did... “ Harry said lowly, looking up under his lashes at them, clearly very nervous. “Um, I’ve thought about stuff.”

“You mean us adopting your baby?” Louis prompted, hoping he wasn’t being too forward, but seeing the state Harry was in made him want to help in whatever way he could.

Harry nodded, wringing his hands in his lap again. He cleared his throat and reached for the glass of water on the table in front of him, sipping at it before he put it back down. His hands shook slightly, and he tucked them under his thighs as he started to speak again. “Um. I choose you two. Please.”

Louis couldn’t speak. His head was whirling in circles, and he shakily turned to Jess, whose own eyes were turning glassy as they filled with tears, hands coming up to her mouth in apparent shock. Louis shook himself back to reality and locked eyes with Harry across the table, smiling softly at him. “Wow, um, we’d be, we’d be honoured, Harry. Really. It means a lot you’ve chosen us. Thank you, so so much.”

“You’re welcome,” Harry mumbled, cheeks red and eyes back on his lap. “Um, I need to go, sorry-”

“Are you okay?” Louis said as he watched Harry get to his feet, pulling on an old looking hoodie. “Do you have somewhere you need to be?”

“I’m flat-hunting.” Harry’s voice was so soft, Louis barely caught the words but he bit his lip at the thought of the pregnant man out there alone, looking for somewhere to live. He just assumed Harry already had a place to stay, and the thought of him having to sleep on the streets or something filled him with dread. “I’m not homeless,” Harry began, clearly having seen Louis’ worried expression. “I just - I need a new place. For me. Somewhere small.”

Louis nodded knowingly, pretending to understand. He stuck his hands in his pocket and came across the piece of paper he’d put in there, taking it out, holding it between his fingertips for a moment. “Look, this is my mobile number, and Jess’ as well, and our house phone is at the bottom. If you need anything, just give us a call, please? Anything at all.”

“Thank you,” Harry said shyly. He paused and looked around, grabbing a pen from the table. He ripped a strip of paper off the bottom and scribbled something on it, passing it back to Louis. “Here’s mine. In case- well, just in case.”

“Cheers Harry,” Louis said, standing in front of the man as he tucked the piece of paper away, not wanting to lose it. Jess stood up and came over, resting a gentle hand on Harry’s shoulder. Louis startled as he realised he hadn’t given his wife a second thought for the past few moments. His attention had entirely been on Harry, and only Harry. 

“Take care, love. Good luck with the flat hunting.”

“Thanks,” Harry said, raising a hand as he walked away. Jess surprised Louis then by circling her arms around his waist, resting her head on his chest.

“He’s a lovely boy,” she said quietly, sighing heavily. “It’s a shame he’s having to give up his baby, but I’m so happy he’s chosen us. I guess we just have to sort out the paperwork now. Shall we go and see Shelley?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Louis said, mind full of thoughts of Harry traipsing alone as he looked for new places to live. Louis remembered that he said didn't have any family around at their last meeting, so it seemed Harry was truly alone in the world. That wasn’t a thought that set well with Louis at all. He was a family man through and through, and he didn't like to think about people struggling through life alone. “Come on then, love.”

*****

Harry let himself into his flat, his keys clinking as he placed them into the small bowl on the little side table by the front door. He kicked off his boots, his feet protesting at being cooped up in them all day and he even pulled off his t-shirt, the fabric clinging uncomfortably to his body. He didn't usually sweat unless he was working out or being physically active, but it appeared being pregnant was already wreaking havoc with his body.

He’d spent the afternoon looking around flats that were either awful or entirely out of his budget, and he was beginning to panic. He only had another ten days before the tenancy ran out on his and Steve’s flat, and Harry knew he didn't have enough in the bank to cover that month’s rent payment. He’d tried to contact Steve about it to ask for some help, or maybe just a loan to tide him over, but it seemed the twat had changed his number, as Harry couldn’t get hold of him.

Harry padded through to the bathroom, running the hot water into the tub, adding a good dollop of his favourite Radox bubble bath to the water, swirling it around with his hand, enjoying the scent as it wafted around the bathroom. He quickly shoved his jeans down his thighs, followed by his boxers. He looked down at his belly. He wasn’t exactly showing properly, not yet, but where there used to be a firm, toned stomach, there was a layer of softness, a swell that didn't used to be there. Harry ran his hands over it and smiled softly, still taken aback by the fact an actual human being was growing inside of him.

Carefully, he reached a leg up and put it into the water, pleased by the temperature. He pulled his other leg in and turned off the taps, sinking down in the water, the level easily encompassing his body. His hands remained on his tummy, trying to connect in whatever small way he could to the baby inside him. He was pleased with his decision of choosing Louis and his wife for his baby. He was. They seemed like nice people, in good, steady jobs, and they’d be able to give them a good life. That much Harry was sure of.

However, it didn't stop the small tears trickling down his cheeks at the thought of having to hand his baby over to the couple at the end of his pregnancy. He knew it was the right thing to do. He had no means to care for a baby, and he knew he couldn’t do it alone. His baby would have a better, more fulfilling life with Louis and Jess than he could ever dream of offering his child. That was the only thing getting him through each day at the moment. He woke up feeling entirely nauseous, unable to bring anything up to alleviate the feeling, and then stumbled through his day, just going through the motions, everything a bit of a fog around him. He was a mess, and he was struggling. He had no-one to turn to. Harry had never felt so alone.

*****

He was sitting alone in his sitting room one afternoon that week after a particularly hellish morning shift at work when his mobile started to ring. The sound confused him at first, because he didn't really get calls. He had no contact with his family, and unless it was Steve, Harry had no idea who would be calling him at this time. He didn't recognise the number on the screen but decided to answer it, tentatively holding the phone to his ear, heart pounding. He hated phone calls.

“Hello? Harry Styles speaking.”

“Harry? Oh it is you, thank goodness, I hope I didn't wake you? This is Louis, by the way, Louis Tomlinson. From the adoption agency?”

“Oh, um, hello Louis. You didn't wake me.” He paused, hoping Louis would carry on talking. He was never much good at conversation, let alone with someone like Louis. Louis. His voice was beautiful, even down the phone. Harry was just pleased Louis wouldn’t be able to see his burning cheeks as he listened to his voice come down the line, at the state he looked in curled up on the sofa in a hoodie Steve had left behind and his baggiest joggers.

“Good, I was worried, but I didn't think before I called. So, how has the flat hunting been going?”

“It’s not,” Harry said bluntly, shrugging to himself. “I haven’t found anything. Bit worried actually.”

“Well, that’s kind of why I’m calling,” Louis began. “I was talking to Jess over the past few days, and we had an idea, about your living situation. We’d like to offer you the spare room at our place, until you find your feet and find somewhere for yourself, obviously. But it’s yours, if you want it-”

“No, I couldn’t- no, thank you. I can’t ask you to do that-”

“You’re not, love. We’re offering. We want to help out, and to be honest, I can’t bear the thought of you not finding somewhere to live, not while you’re carrying a baby.”

“I don’t want to be a burden, Louis.”

“You wouldn’t be. Harry, I promise you I don’t think of you that way, nor does Jess. We just… we want to help, and we’re in a position to. You can say no, but I’d really like it if you didn't. At least say you’ll think about it?”

“I will. Um, thank you, Louis.”

“No worries, Harry. Just give me a call or a text, whatever you want, when you’ve made your mind up, okay?”

“Yeah, okay. Speak soon.”

“Okay, love. Bye now.” Harry couldn’t stop the small smile crossing his face when he ended the call with Louis. No-one had ever really been as nice to him as Louis had. His wife was okay, a lot quieter and less friendly than Louis, but there was something… special about Louis that Harry really liked. It didn't hurt that Louis was absolutely beautiful. He was a petite man, much smaller in stature than Harry was, and he had a smile that lit up his entire face when it appeared. His eyes shone a bright blue like the ocean, and Harry felt a spark whenever Louis touched him.

But Louis was married. Louis was meant for another, and that meant Harry had to stay away. He couldn’t deny the idea of living with Louis and Jess was a tempting one. He had a feeling they’d look after him properly, would make sure he got to all of his appointments, and he’d feel safe. What Harry really missed was a home. These four walls were nothing without Steve, and the idea of moving into a small space that was just his, with no escape, no-one to turn to during the long, dark evenings filled him with dread.

Without thinking, Harry snatched up his phone, pressing on the number that had just called him, feeling nervous as it rang a few times before Louis’ voice filled his ear. Harry shivered slightly at the sound.

“Harry? Are you okay?” Louis’ voice was full of concern, and Harry wanted to set him straight, despite the butterflies he felt at the thought of speaking to Louis again.

“Yeah. Um. I’d like to accept your offer. Please.”

“Oh that’s great, Harry. Really good. We can sort things out when you’re ready to move in, take your time, love.” Harry paused, unsure how to reveal the next bit of information. “Harry? Are you in trouble? Do you need help?”

“I only have a week left before they kick me out,” he all but whispered, his voice cracking at the end, ashamed and embarrassed at the revelation. “I don’t- oh god…”

“Then we will get you moved in this week, okay? I’ll come by one evening after work and help with your things, I’ll bring Jess and we’ll sort you out. Don’t worry, stress isn’t good for the baby. Let us help you, Harry. And before you say it, you aren’t a burden. We want to do this. Is Tuesday good for you?”

Harry nodded through his tears before he realised Louis couldn’t see him, and cleared his throat, the phone still held close to his ear. “Yes. Thank you, so much. I- just... thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank us. Look, if you need anything else, let me know? I’m always at the other end of the phone, for whatever you need. I know this is a strange situation, but I get the feeling you don’t really have anyone else, love.” Harry stayed silent, unable to bring himself to confirm Louis’ words, his chest feeling tight now, tears bubbling and threatening to fall. “I’ll let you go, but text me your address and I’ll be there Tuesday with Jess. Don’t worry about anything, we’ll get you sorted.”

“Thank you,” Harry said, wincing at the sound of his voice, the upset obvious in it. “Bye Louis.”

“Bye Harry, take care,” Louis said softly before he hung up. Harry sniffed and set the phone down on the sofa next to his leg, still curled tightly under his blanket, one of the only things he had left from home that he brought with him. The thought that he was leaving his little home in a few days filled him with fear, but the thought of moving in with Louis and Jess didn't scare him as much as it might’ve done beforehand. They were nice people, and Harry was sure he’d only be there a couple of weeks at most.

He rolled back onto his side, trying to concentrate on the episode of Luther that was playing on his small TV. He didn't really know why he watched this alone, it always made him jumpy and then he found it hard to fall asleep, but there was something riveting about it that Harry loved. His eyelids felt heavy as he watched, and before he knew it, Harry was sound asleep, the panic that had been whizzing around his body at finding somewhere to live finally dissipating, letting him fall into the deepest sleep he’d had for weeks.

*****

The next Tuesday evening, Harry sat in his nearly empty flat, waiting for Louis’ arrival. He’d exchanged texts with Louis at the weekend telling him his address, and that he didn't actually have many belongings to move. Louis had made it clear it didn't matter how many runs he had to do, he’d get it all moved for Harry, which Harry really appreciated. The flat looked weird without Harry’s many knick-knacks dotted on the surfaces. They were all in the few boxes he’d gotten from the nearby supermarket, and he’d spent the last few evenings wrapping his precious things in bubble wrap, or between the layers of his jumpers, protecting them from the move.

He’d decided some of the furniture could stay, some of it too old to bother with it, but a few things would be going into Louis’ garage, ready for his new place. Harry had also decided to leave the bed behind, not wanting to take the reminder of Steve along with him. He wanted to save up and buy something that was solely his, something that had no memories associated with it, something that could just be his.

He was startled from his thoughts by the sound of his doorbell. He stood up, pulling his t-shirt down over the pudge of his belly that he was growing to love, and headed down the hallway, smoothing down his hair before he pulled the door open. He tried not to stare at the sight of Louis on his doorstep, looking absolutely gorgeous in casual jogging bottoms and a tight red t-shirt that clung perfectly to his frame.

“Hey, love. Just me, I’m afraid, Jess was kept late at work with a big case, so you’ve only got my big muscles to help you.” Harry giggled and stepped aside, letting Louis come in. He silently berated himself for his ridiculous reaction to Louis’ appearance and followed him, watching Louis mentally sizing up the boxes, seeing what would fit into the truck he’d pulled up in. “Just so you know, the truck isn’t mine. A mate at the magazine heard me talk to Jess about moving, and he offered it. I thought it might be easier than trying to squeeze it all in my Alfa.”

Harry nodded, shyly stepping closer to a pile of boxes, going to pick one up before he felt a hand on his arm and looked up, seeing a stony expression on Louis’ face. “Um, what do you think you’re doing?”

“Lifting this box?”

“No, you’re not. You’re pregnant. You’re not lifting anything heavy, at all. That’s what I’m here for. You can move… that pile of coats,” Louis said, gesturing with his hands to the few jackets hung over the back of the sofa Harry was donating to goodwill, another item he associated too much with Steve to want to keep.

“Louis, I want to help-”

“I know, but you have to be careful, love. I’ve been reading up, and your muscles and ligaments are much more delicate at this stage, and I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you or the baby because I let you lift something too heavy.”

“Okay,” Harry all but whispered back, feeling something warm bubble inside him at how protective Louis was being over him. He picked up the coats and jackets, opening the front door, trying not to stare at the bulge of Louis’ biceps as he struggled with two large cardboard boxes full of Harry’s clothes. He didn't have much, but the things he did have meant a lot to him, and he had spent hours folding things properly, sealing the boxes with packing tape, neatly labelling everything with a Sharpie he borrowed from college.

Louis made a few more trips while Harry hovered outside, feeling entirely useless. When the back of the truck was full, Louis opened the passenger door, Harry just staring at him. “Harry, we’ll come back for more, this is it for now. Do you want to come home with me now so I can unload, you can have a nosey around? Jess might be home by the time we get there.” Harry nodded and quietly slid into the passenger seat, pulling the seatbelt on, careful to make it wasn’t too tight across his belly, Louis smiling at the gesture.

“Getting a little belly there, you must be nearly fourteen weeks by now?”

“Yeah, tomorrow, actually. Well, I think so, anyway.”

“Have you not had your dating scan yet, Harry?”

“Um, I haven’t really been to the doctors yet? I went for them to confirm I was pregnant but I never followed anything up. I just kind of guessed dates based off when I thought I must’ve got pregnant…”

“Well, I don’t mean to be pushy, but we need to sort that tomorrow, okay? You need proper care, to make sure you and the baby are healthy. And yes, I mean you  _ and _ the baby. We want to take care of the pair of you. Do you have a GP?”

“Yeah, um, Strawberry Hill.”

“On the other side of town?” Harry nodded. “Okay, well, give them a call tomorrow, and I can drive you over there, it’s not a problem. Does that sound okay with you? I don’t want you to think I’m being too pushy, I’ve just been through this loads with my Mum and Jess…”

“It’s fine,” Harry hurried to say, not wanting Louis to think he was upset with him when that couldn't be further from the truth. Harry enjoyed feeling like someone cared about his well being and he smiled at Louis across the centre console of the truck, liking how Louis looked behind the wheel. “Oh wow, is this your home?”

“Yours now, too,” Louis said with a smile, and turned the engine off, pushing his heavy door open. “Out you get then, doesn’t look like Jess is home yet.” 

Harry slid out carefully, his feet crunching on the gravel beneath his feet. He looked up in slight awe at the beautiful house in front of him. It wasn’t too huge or grand, but to Harry, it was perfect. It was a small detached home, a small garage to one side and a white front door with a lovely planter in front with a small shrub inside. It looked welcoming and homely, and Harry couldn’t believe he got to live here, even if it was only for a few weeks.

“Come on, in you come,” Louis called, arms full of boxes as he kicked the front door open, grinning back at Harry. He followed him up the driveway and looked around as Louis put the boxes down in the small hallway, kicking off his shoes as it felt like the sort of home you shouldn’t wear your shoes in. “Thanks for that, taking your shoes off, I mean. Jess is a bit particular about that.”

“S’only polite,” Harry said, smiling slightly at Louis. “You have a beautiful home.”

“Thanks, we like it,” Louis grinned back, kicking off his own shoes. “Lemme show you around before I grab the other boxes, show you where you’ll be sleeping and stuff then you can choose where you wanna put your stuff.” Harry nodded and shuffled along behind Louis as he headed for a white wooden door, pushing it open.

“Okay, living room. Feel free to watch what you want on the telly when we aren’t about, I’m sure you can figure out all the buttons and stuff but if not, just ask. Through there is the dining room, although we tend to eat in the kitchen. Up to you, though, if you want to sit in there for mealtimes.”

Harry’s eyes were wide as he took in the lovely home Louis and Jess lived in. Family pictures littered the surfaces, and Harry was itching to ask Louis about them, who the smiling children were. He wished he had the courage to stop Louis and ask him all about the photos, sure the man would wax lyrical about them but as usual, his shyness took over and he bit his lip, stepping away. It wasn’t his place to ask anyway. He stopped at a photo of Louis and Jess’ wedding day, feeling a little emotional at the big smiles on their faces, how beautiful Jess looked, and how handsome Louis was. He followed him into the kitchen, jaw dropping at the expanse of units, and the high-tech gadgets.

“We were lucky that the people before us remodelled the kitchen before we moved in, we kinda love it. Feel free to come in here whenever and cook what you want, when you want. We’re not picky about food either, so let us know if you there’s something you really want to eat, and we’ll do our best to make sure we get it.”

“Thanks,” Harry mumbled, still a little in shock as he took in his new surroundings. They headed upstairs next, Harry’s toes sinking into the plush pile of the cream carpet. Family photos were framed on the wall all the way up the stairs, and it settled warmly in Harry’s heart that Louis and Jess were clearly family people. “Your pictures are gorgeous.”

“Thanks. I’m a big fan of photos being around,” Louis said, pausing at the top of the stairs. He pointed at a closed door. “That’s mine and Jess’ room. Bathroom is there, obviously help yourself to that whenever you want. Your room is just along here.” He walked along a small hallway and stopped. “You go in first, it’s your room now.”

Harry felt a bit shy but put his hand on the silver handle, pushing it down and stepping inside. There was a light grey carpet on the floor, a silver bedframe against one wall with a navy bedspread on top, and a dark grey comforter on the end. There was an empty bookshelf, a white wooden wardrobe and a chest of drawers.

“It’s- god, it’s lovely. Thank you so much for this,” Harry said, wanting nothing more than to jump on the bed and make himself at home. He held back until Louis put a hand at the base of his spine, pushing him forwards.

“I can see you want to. Go on.” He turned around at that point and slipped out of the room, pulling the door closed behind him, giving Harry some privacy. The kind and thoughtful gesture made Harry want to cry, but instead, he ran at the bed, leaping onto it, smiling as the bedspread puffed up around him.

“Fucking hell,” he muttered under his breath, wondering quietly how he got so lucky. After a few minutes of exploring his new surroundings, pulling open empty drawers and doors, flicking light switches on and off, and playing with the dark grey roller blind at the window, he headed back downstairs, listening out for any sign of Louis. He watched as the man set another box on the floor, and grinned down at him. “Can I help?”

“Um, no?” Louis laughed, wiping his brow with the hem of his t-shirt. Harry swallowed, quickly looking away from the expanse of tanned belly that became exposed as Louis’ t-shirt hitched up. The small roundness of his tummy made Harry smile and want to touch, so instead, he walked past Louis and shoved his boots back onto his feet, grabbing the coats and a few other stray things from the truck before taking them back indoors.

“They’re lightweight, don’t worry,” Harry muttered as he walked past, quickly hanging his few jackets on the coat hook. “Oh, is this okay, I can-”

“Love, it’s fine,” Louis said, heading upstairs with a couple of smaller boxes. “Look, why don’t you head upstairs and start putting things away while I bring these boxes up, and in a while, when Jess is home, we can head back to yours and grab the last few bits?”

“Okay, thank you,” Harry said, following Louis up the stairs, keeping his eyes firmly on his feet, not on Louis’ perky bum in front of him. Once inside his new room, he peeled the tape off the first box, opening a few drawers and setting his clothes inside as Louis continued to pile boxes up against one wall. Harry couldn’t help smiling as he saw his things slowly filling up the bedroom, popping a few books on the bookshelves, along with a couple of knick knacks he liked to have; his candles, a few small plants, and a ceramic teddy his grandma gave him when he was a baby. It wasn’t much, but Harry felt oddly at home already.

“Ooh, posh candles,” Louis said as he flopped down onto the edge of the bed, watching Harry put away a few more clothes, hanging up a couple of shirts in the wardrobe. “I do like a good scented candle.”

“You do? Steve hated them, always made me blow them out when he got home-” Harry cut off when he realised what he was saying, a blush spreading over his cheeks. “Um…”

“I like them,” Louis repeated. “Maybe you’ll have to burn one downstairs sometime, might broaden my candle horizons and get me to try a new one or something.”

“Yeah, okay,” Harry said, turning back to the jumpers he’d just folded and folded them again, wanting to keep his hands busy. They both went quiet as they heard the front door open and Harry swallowed, suddenly feeling nervous at the thought of meeting Jess again. He pondered over the fact it was Jess and not Louis who made him feel nervous but he pushed that to the back of his mind as he followed Louis out of his room and down the stairs.

“Hey, welcome home,” Jess said, smiling up at Harry, looking tired. “Things going okay?”

“Yeah, just a few bits still at Harry’s we need to grab, then we’re done. Can you come with us and help? I don’t want Haz doing anything strenuous at the moment.”

“Sure, lemme just go and put on something more comfortable, I’m not sure this dress is the right thing for lifting and climbing in that bloody awful truck,” she joked, jogging up the stairs. It only took her a few minutes before she reappeared in a pair of leggings and a baggy jumper, her hair pulled into a messy bun on top of her head. She looked beautiful even like that, and Harry smiled softly at her, still feeling a little awkward in her presence. “Okay, let’s go, boys.”

The drive to Harry’s took no time at all, and with three of them working together, Harry’s flat was empty aside from the items he was leaving behind, and it was time to go. Harry wandered around a few more times while Louis and Jess stacked the last few things into the truck and secured them down, making sure he hadn’t left anything important behind. It felt odd, knowing it was the last time he’d be in this flat, the place he’d called home for the past few years. He left his bedroom, checking the kitchen before he stood in the living room, just taking a few deep breaths for a moment.

He could hear Louis and Jess come back in the flat behind him, and he turned, giving them a wobbly smile. Jess returned it but quickly looked away, as if she didn't know exactly how to deal with a hormonal, pregnant man. Louis, on the other hand, walked over, giving Harry a look of concern.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Um, I think I’m gonna leave my key here. I don’t need to come back.”

“Are you sure, Harry? You don’t have to rush anything, we can come back if you need more time-”

“No, it’s fine. I need to move on.” He hooked his keyring out of his pocket and quickly twisted off a brass key, turning it over in his fingers for a few minutes before he set it on a shelf. He exhaled shakily and could feel the familiar burn of tears in his eyes, emotions overwhelming him for a moment. He pressed his hands into his eyes, wishing he was alone to fall apart.

He heard someone leave, the sound of shoes fading, and he felt his breath catch as tears began sliding down his cheeks.

"Hey ... Harry, it's ok ..." he heard Louis' voice, and he both wanted to listen to him and wanted him to leave. He didn't like anyone seeing him like this. It wasn't long before Louis' voice reached his ears again. "Can I ... can I touch you? Hug you? I just ... I want to help."

Harry bit down hard on his lip and nodded, giving in to what he secretly wanted, and in that next moment, he felt warm arms around his torso. To his surprise, he relaxed into it, resting his head on Louis' shoulder, and cried quietly, trying not to make too much noise.

Eventually, Harry pulled away and wiped at his eyes, feeling embarrassed at his show of emotion.

“God, I’m so sorry, I-”

“Don’t apologise,” Louis said softly, wiping away a tear with his thumb. “It’s a lot to deal with. I’m going to go and wait outside with Jess, take your time okay? I’m just outside if you need me.”

“Thank you,” Harry mumbled, grateful Louis was giving him a couple of moments to himself. He closed his eyes and ran through a few memories before his eyes opened and he steeled himself. He stood up tall as he walked towards the hallway, sliding on his boots before he stood in the doorway for the final time. He took one look back into his home and pulled the door shut, hearing the final click as he did so, putting the flat and his memories into the past once and for all.

He quietly walked out to the truck, where he could see Louis and Jess sat talking in the front seats, although they went quiet as he slid in. Louis turned and looked at him before he started the engine.

“Are you ready?”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

“We wondered if you’d like takeaway tonight, Harry? Our treat to welcome you home. We were thinking Chinese?”

“Um, I don’t have any cash on me-”

“It’s on us,” Louis insisted as he started the truck and began driving. “I’m rather partial to egg fried rice though, so if you want it, I suggest you order your own.”

“He gets vicious if you steal his food, just to warn you,” Jess joked, drawing a laugh out of Harry. He realised then he hadn’t even looked back as they’d driven away, and for a moment, he felt full of hope, that he might actually find some happiness now he was making a fresh start. He was due a bit of good luck, after all.

*****

Louis looked up from where he was sat at the kitchen table a few days later, hearing footsteps on the stairs. After so many years, he knew it wasn’t Jess, it was too heavy-footed for that, and he smiled as Harry poked his head around the doorway, smiling nervously at him. Louis had hoped that Harry would be a little more comfortable by now, but he still acted as if he were a houseguest rather than someone who lived there.

“Tea, love?” he asked, and Harry nodded, hovering as if he weren’t sure what to do with himself. “Come and sit down with me, you’re making the place look untidy.” 

Harry smiled and shuffled over, very cosy looking in some jogging bottoms and a baggy t-shirt, a hand clasped against his belly. Louis wasn’t sure it was a conscious thing Harry did, but he loved it anyway. He flicked on the kettle and made Harry a tea, setting the cup down in front of him.

They drank in silence for a while as Louis read the news on his iPad, and Harry picked up one of Jess’ magazines, flicking through the pages until he disappeared, returning ten minutes later fully dressed, stuffing a few pieces of paper into a well-loved looking bag, his hair held back by a thin black headband. Louis had never really been into longer hair on men before but somehow, it suited Harry, and Louis wondered idly if it was as soft as it looked, how the strands would feel between his fingers.

Jess came into the room then, dressed smartly as always in a red dress with a black jacket on top, black ballet pumps on her feet. She greeted Louis with a quick kiss on the cheek, and Harry with a smile and a hand on his shoulder. She spoke about her day with the pair before Harry stood up and slung his bag across his body, making sure he didn't bump his belly with it before he went to leave the room.

“Where are you going?” Louis called, puzzled as Harry hadn’t said anything about leaving the whole time they’d sat together drinking tea and reading.

“Oh, um, I have college, my first class is in an hour.” He smiled and held up a hand, waving goodbye.

“Hang on, you’re walking?” Jess called, and Harry appeared again, nodding, his eyes on the floor. “Don’t be daft, love. I have to pass the college on my way to work, I’ll give you a lift.”

“Oh, I don’t want to be a bother-”

“You’re not,” Louis jumped in, wishing Harry would stop thinking of himself as a burden. “Jess isn’t going out of her way, and to be honest Harry, you need to let us start helping you out. You can’t be walking miles for no reason, not while you’re pregnant. What if something happened?”

“Okay, sorry,” Harry mumbled, his cheeks flushing red, as if he were embarrassed at Louis’ reaction. “I’ll, um, wait in the hall-”

“Come and sit. Please,” Louis asked, and Harry nodded, shuffling back over and dropping his bag on the floor. He accepted the slice of toast Louis pushed towards him on a plate, and sat quietly as Louis followed Jess out of the room. “Hey, Jess?”

Jess turned around and looked at Louis, sorting a few things out of a folder and slotting them into another, which she placed into her large black work bag. “What’s up, Lou?”

“I think later on we need to talk to Harry about his timetable, try and sort it so one of us can try and help out as much as we can with lifts and stuff. He might be alright now while he’s only just a few weeks, but by the time his bump gets bigger and he’s more uncomfortable, he’s going to need more help. I just don’t want him to think we’re being too heavy.”

“No, that’s very, um, thoughtful of you. We could do it tonight, over dinner? Did he tell you when the scan was?”

“Oh yeah, sorry, it’s on Friday at 10, his doctor’s surgery can do all that, apparently. I’m going in to work late, can you as well?” She nodded and stepped over, kissing Louis’ cheek quickly, his heart falling at the almost dismissive gesture.

“Harry? Are you ready, hun?” she called, and Harry soon appeared, bag on his shoulder again. “See you tonight, Louis.”

“Bye, Lou,” Harry mumbled, meeting his eyes for a moment as he walked out, following Jess and sitting in the passenger seat, his bag by his feet. Louis waved as Jess reversed the car, whirring off down the road. Louis sighed and closed the door, heading back to the table where he was going to be working from home.

After a short while of writing an article that just wasn’t going his way, Louis headed upstairs, wanting to change into some shorts, too hot in his joggers. He peered into Harry’s room before he went into his own bedroom, and smiled at how neat and tidy everything was. Harry had already made his bed, his phone charger was neatly curled up on top of the bedside table rather than trailing out of the wall like Louis’ always was, and his window was cracked open, filling the room with fresh air.

Not wanting to feel like he was prying, Louis went back into his own room, smiling wryly at the very messy bed and wires spouting out from behind his own bedside table, and at the mess atop Jess’, her spare glasses, kindle, nail varnishes and a book littering the surface. Clearly, the pair of them were the antithesis of Harry but somehow, Louis had a feeling Harry was going to fit into their home perfectly. He hoped Harry would realise that himself soon enough.

*****

“You okay? Nervous?” Louis asked, eyeballing Harry in the rearview mirror as he drove the three of them across town to Harry’s doctor’s surgery for his first proper prenatal appointment.

“Yeah, and I really need a wee,” Harry mumbled making both Louis and Jess laugh. He knew that Harry had struggled to drink the suggested amount of fluid for the scan that morning, and the way he was wriggling in his seat suggested he wasn’t embellishing his feelings at all. “Don’t laugh, it hurts…”

“Sorry,” Louis smiled back, fixing his gaze back on the road. He fiddled with the stereo system, letting Radio 2 play out, the familiar dulcet tones of Chris Evans’ breakfast show filling the car as they sat in the morning traffic. “Won’t be long, love.”

They arrived soon enough and Louis and Jess went to sit down while Harry checked himself in. It wasn’t long until they were called through by the midwife, and they sat together on the chairs, Harry on one end, Louis in the middle and Jess at the other end.

The midwife, a young blonde woman, smiled across the table at the three of them, putting down a few pieces of paperwork before she began to speak. Louis glanced over at Harry, seeing he was visibly nervous by the way he was fiddling with the cuff of his jumper, and nibbling on his lip, and wished there was something he could do to soothe him a bit. Instead, he just smiled when Harry’s eyes met his, and he was pleased Harry returned the smile, albeit a lot smaller than Louis’ own.

“Okay, so. My name’s Angela Williams and I’m going to be your midwife for the duration of your pregnancy Harry, unless we need to get other medical professionals involved later down the line, which I’m sure won’t be necessary. I understand this is your first appointment?”

“Um, yeah,” Harry confirmed, answers short and voice quiet.

“Right, so I’m going to get you to fill in your paperwork first of all so I have a bit of an idea about you, your diet and general health. Are these your friends?”

“Well…” Harry looked a bit stressed, as if he didn't know what to say and looked to Louis for guidance.

“We are his friends, yes, but we are also adopting Harry’s baby. I’m Louis, and this is my wife, Jessica. Harry’s living with us at the moment, so we wanted to support him here.” Harry flashed Louis a grateful smile as he looked up from the form he was filling in, and Louis smiled back, glad he seemed to have put Harry at ease a bit. The midwife continued to ask a few questions and when Harry finished, she ran her eyes down the paperwork, seeming satisfied with the answers.

“Right, this all looks good, Harry. I think after your scan and I’ve let you use the loo, I’ll draw some blood and then you’ll be free to go, how does that sound?”

“Good,” Harry nodded, standing up when Angela did.

“Excellent. If you could just hop up on the bed and pop your top up for me, that’d be great.” Louis watched as Harry did that, then he craned his head back, looking over to where Louis and Jess were still sat on their chairs, watching from a distance.

“You can come over and see,” he said softly, and Louis jumped at the chance, standing next to Harry with Jess on his other side.

“Sorry, this will be cold,” Angela said apologetically, and squirted a blob of blue gel over Harry’s tummy, spreading it with the wand. The screen was angled towards her for a moment before she smiled and nodded, turning it around. “Okay, all is looking good, Harry. What I’m seeing tells me you are about fifteen weeks or thereabouts, putting your due date in September, around the fifth. And… here’s your baby.”

What Louis saw took his breath away. He’d seen plenty of his own Mum’s scan pictures before, but seeing his own baby inside Harry, wriggling on the screen was just so much. It was only small, but there was a definite baby shape, a pronounced head and body. Louis just stared for a moment as Angela kept the wand in place on Harry’s tummy, letting them all watch in awe. Louis glanced down to Harry, and was alarmed to see tears in the boy’s eyes.

Without thinking, he reached out and grabbed Harry’s left hand, holding it gently until Harry squeezed back, telling him he’d done the right thing in offering him some comfort. He then realised he hadn’t paid any attention to Jess since the baby had appeared on the screen, and quickly stretched out, grabbing her hand in his other hand, smiling at her. She had a tight smile on her face at Louis’ action, but allowed her hand to be held, looking a little amazed at the screen.

“Um, can you tell me if it’s a boy or girl please?” Harry asked, his voice barely a whisper, clearly trying to hold himself together.

“Not ‘til 20 weeks,” Louis replied without thinking, his eyes snapping up to the Midwife’s, seeing an impressed smile on her face. “Sorry, been through so many pregnancies with my Mum, think some of the stuff is well and truly drilled into my brain.”

“Ah, well, you’re very right, Louis. We can’t tell the gender just now, Harry, but if that’s what you want, we can do that at your next scan.” Harry just nodded, still unable to rip his eyes away from the screen. “Did you want a picture?”

“Please,” Harry mumbled as Louis nodded, and the midwife seemed to understand that she needed to print more than one image. “Um, if you don’t mind me having one?” he asked Louis and Jess, who quickly shook their heads.

“Of course we don’t, Harry,” Jess said, resting a hand on top of his, which was still in Louis’ hold. The midwife flicked the monitor off and wiped the gel off Harry’s belly, letting him sit up. Louis couldn’t help but notice that a proper little bump was starting to form now, and no matter how many times he saw a pregnant belly, he was always in awe of the fact human beings could grown new human beings inside of them. He held out a hand and helped Harry down from the bed, who mumbled something that sounded like thank you in return, all of them returning to their seats.

“Okay, so all looks good with your initial scan. I’m going to let you use the loo then we’ll get those bloods done. After that, you’re free to go, but before you do, please book in at the desk for your twenty week appointment. Your friends are welcome to join you again, of course. Do you have any questions for me?”

“Um, I know I’m not allowed to eat certain things when pregnant…” Harry started and Angela nodded, turning to her desk drawer. A few seconds later, she produced a couple of leaflets, handing Harry one, then Louis.

“You’re right. Everything is in this pamphlet, and I recommended popping a copy on the fridge so everyone in the household is aware of the do’s and don’t while you’re pregnant. Have a good read of it, but as long as you keep a healthy, balanced diet, you should be fine. If you have any questions, the number for our community midwife is at the bottom there, and you can always come and see me too. Louis, Jess, do you have any questions?”

They looked at each other and shook their heads, both happy with what they’d heard. Angela disappeared for a second while Harry went to use the loo, and she returned with a tray ready to take Harry’s blood. Jess visibly went pale and Louis knew it was because of the needles.

“Um, do you mind if I go wait outside? I just can’t-” she motioned towards the things on the desk and Harry and Louis nodded before she left, leaving them alone.

“God, I hate needles,” Harry whispered to Louis as Angela put the tourniquet around his upper arm, patting the skin at his inner arm, looking for a vein.

“Aww, want me to hold your hand?” Louis teased, but he was surprised by how quickly Harry nodded. He took Harry’s left hand as Angela prepared the needle, watching how Harry screwed his eyes up. All of a sudden, Harry’s body was against his and his face was in Louis’ neck, his breaths tickling Louis’ skin. Louis didn't move for a moment then quickly got himself together, squeezing Harry’s hand, rubbing up and down his back, comforting him as Angela made quick work of taking the vials of blood she needed before she applied a small plaster to Harry’s arm.

“All done,” she said, and Harry slowly sat up, looking down at his arm.

“Shit, sorry,” Harry mumbled, his cheeks red, not able to meet Louis’ eyes.

“Hey, don’t worry. That’s what I’m here for, yeah? Jess was always rubbish with needles too, I’m not bothered so if you need a hand or a shoulder, gimme a shout, okay?” Harry nodded and slipped his jumper back on. “Are we free to go?”

“You are indeed,” Angela nodded, handing Louis a couple of pieces of paper while Harry got his coat on. “Just hand these in when you book Harry’s next appointment, and if you have any questions, do give us a call and one of my team will get back to you.”

“Thank you so much,” Harry said softly, walking towards the door, Louis hot on his heels. They walked to the reception desk together, Louis quickly smiling over at Jess. Something told him not to leave Harry just yet in case he had a funny turn after his blood work like Jess used to, and he hovered while Harry booked the next appointment. “Is that time okay, Lou?”

“Sorry, what?” Louis asked, wincing when he realised he hadn’t been paying any attention at all.

“Nine am on a Wednesday, is that alright? In about six weeks.”

“Yeah, I’m sure that’ll be fine, they have to give me time off for these things, right?” he mumbled, quickly inputting the date into his phone, the only sure way he’d remember the appointment. When Harry was done, they walked outside to the car, Harry getting into the backseat again. “So I’ll drop you at home, Haz, then Jess and I will go to work and we’ll be home later. Or did you want me to drop you somewhere else?”

“Nah, your place is fine,” Harry replied, and Louis hoped one day he would refer to it as home. Soon, Louis pulled in and watched as Harry climbed out, holding his jacket closed against the biting wind. “See you both later.”

“Bye, love,” Louis called, waving as Harry headed off up the drive, disappearing behind the front door. “So… that was pretty fucking amazing, right?” he said to Jess, grinning at the memory of seeing his baby for the first time. “I mean, we saw our baby, Jess.”

“I know. I just… I don’t want to get excited just yet. Not with our history. I mean, I know it’s Harry and not me, but still. Maybe next time I can feel like it’s going to be okay.”

“Sorry, I get that, babe, I really do,” Louis said, reaching to take her hand. He liked how she laced her smaller fingers around his, silence settling between them as they continued the drive towards Jess’ office. When Louis pulled up, he was surprised when she leaned across and kissed his lips gently, cradling his face with her hands.

“Love you, see you tonight. Don’t work too hard.” She smiled and swung her legs out of the car, reaching back in to pick up her bags.

“Love you too. Bye, Jess,” Louis said, watching her head into the building, his head swimming. It felt like months since Jess had last initiated any sort of intimacy with him, and if he was honest, it felt…. Odd. He shook off the thought as he pulled back out on the main road and headed to work, the scan picture burning a hole in his wallet, a smile on his face as he thought again of the tiny baby growing in Harry’s belly, his heart full of excitement for what was to come.

*****

“Oh my god, what the hell is that smell?” Louis called as he stepped into the house, kicking off his shoes. He inhaled as he hurried through to the kitchen, wondering how Jess had got home early enough to cook something that smelt so delicious given her previous attempts at cooking weren’t exactly successful.

He came skidding to a halt when he saw Harry at the counter, stirring something at the hob, the smell utterly delicious. Louis also couldn’t help but think Harry looked quite stunning, stood in a pair of shorts, barefoot with an apron wrapped around his belly, showing off his pronounced little bump more than he usually would. He turned and smiled at Louis, reaching for something off to the side before he sprinkled it in.

Louis couldn’t resist getting closer, and peered in to see what was in the pan, biting his lip at the sight of creamy mashed potatoes. He turned and then looked in the oven, something cooking on a oven tray inside bubbling away.

“What is all this for? And you cook?!” he practically shrieked, excitement filling his veins. “Um, you’re not having friends around for dinner, are you? Have I been horribly presumptuous?”

“No,” Harry said with a laugh, moving easily around Louis, sliding his hands into the pink and purple striped oven gloves hanging from the oven door handle. He carefully slid out the tray and put it on a couple of cork mats, laughing when he turned to see Louis practically drooling. “Do you wanna go and get changed before dinner?”

“Sure,” Louis replied, and practically ran up the stairs, throwing on an old t-shirt and some joggers before he rejoined Harry in the kitchen. “How can I help?”

“Um, set the table please?” Louis nodded and grabbed the mats and water glasses, followed by the cutlery, setting things out neatly, having a feeling this was important to Harry for some reason. “Tell me what you’ve cooked, love. This looks amazing, I have to say. I wish you told me you cooked!”

“Sorry, yeah, I love cooking,” Harry said, and Louis loved how his eyes sparkled as he started telling Louis all about the meal he’d made for them. “So it’s nothing fancy, but it’s something my Mum loved making when I was little. It’s chicken wrapped in parma ham with mozarella cheese inside, with mash and green beans.”

“Fuck me, I’ve died and gone to heaven,” Louis confirmed, pretending to ignore the blush creeping up Harry’s cheeks at his choice of words. “Here, let me grab those.” Louis reached and took the warm plates from Harry’s hands, putting them on the table before he grabbed the last one. “Jess should be home any minute, she’s gonna be so excited I haven’t just cooked her another frozen dinner…”

Harry smiled at Louis as he took off his apron, popping it on the counter before he smoothed his top over his tummy, resting both hands on it for a second.

“Proper little bump now, isn’t it?” Louis said quietly, hoping the comment wasn’t too much. It didn't seem it was because Harry smiled down at it before he slid into his chair at the table, pouring some water from the jug into the three glasses Louis had set out. “S’good though, means bubba is growing nicely.”

“Yeah, it is. Feels weird but at the same time, really nice,” Harry said, jumping when the front door banged shut.

“Louis, what the hell have you been cooking- oh.” Jess’ face was a picture as she stood in the doorway of the kitchen, staring at the two seated men. “Who did this?”

“Me,” Harry said shyly as she sat down, looking in wonder at the plate of food in front of her. “Erm, I did it to say thank you to both of you for taking me to the appointment earlier, and supporting me. It, um, it meant a lot to me.”

“Hey, you’re more than welcome, love,” Louis said, smiling over to Harry across the table. “We’re happy to do whatever you need us to, right Jess?”

“Definitely,” she agreed. “We’re really grateful you let us be part of it, actually. You don’t have to, so thank you for being so great about this.”

“I also wanted to say… um, I can get your rent money by the end of next week, I should be paid by then…”

“No, that’s fine,” Louis said, sliding the first bite of chicken into his mouth. “Jess and I talked, and we don’t expect you to pay any rent. Just maybe contribute to the groceries or something if you must, but we don’t need money, love. Save what you’ve got for your place.”

“I couldn’t just-”

“Hey, listen. We won’t take any money, Harry. Just… cook us food like this every now and then, and we’ll be happy. We’re pretty easy to please. Maybe help us out with the housework, do a bit of shopping with us, that’s all we ask.”

Harry thought it over for a few minutes, before he looked up, swallowing his mouthful of food. “Are you sure? I really don’t mind.”

“We’re more than sure. And this is delicious, Harry, thank you so much,” Jess said, cutting up another piece of chicken. “Honestly, Louis never gets food like this, I’m a bit hopeless.”

“You’re just… a bit challenged when it comes to cooking, love,” Louis teased, and even Harry giggled along with the pair of them. “Harry, seriously, this is gorgeous, and a lovely surprise. Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome,” Harry said, scooping up some mash and beans onto his own fork. He hummed around the mouthful and they ate the rest of their meals silently, each of them enjoying all of it. Louis caught Harry’s eye as he finished off his dinner, winking quickly at him, intrigued by Harry's reaction of looking straight down into his lap. He decided not to question it for now, now knowing that it was more often than not that Harry avoided eye contact. He wished there was something he could do to make Harry more comfortable, but he just wasn’t sure what. Maybe all he needed was a little time.

*****

Harry pushed back from the table when everyone was done, and started gathering the plates up when Louis stopped him, taking the dishes from his hands. Harry looked up in confusion, wondering what Louis was doing.

“You sit. You cooked all this, me and Jess are going to wash up and clear away. Go and relax, Harry.”

“Okay but just let me-“

“Listen to Lou, he means it,” Jess smiled over to Harry, who reluctantly agreed, tucking his chair under before he headed upstairs. He felt like a bit of a read so climbed the stairs, his aching lower back protesting at the movements of his body.

Once upstairs, he closed his door behind him and pulled off his clothes, pulling on a baggy t shirt and some baggier sports shorts, still not comfortable enough to sleep in just his boxers as he preferred to. He settled on his bed and grabbed his book, a light-hearted romance he’d read several times but always went back to when he needed something to make him smile and fill him with hope.

Later on, and with tired eyes, Harry dragged himself out of bed, tucking his tatty old bookmark between the pages before he crept out of his room and down the hall to the bathroom. He’s just put a strip of toothpaste onto his brush when a hand on his shoulder startled him, making him shout out.

“Oh shit- Louis, you scared me!” He rested a hand on his heart, trying to slow it where it was pounding in his chest.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to. Are you alright?” Louis looked at him, full of concern and suddenly Harry felt bad.

“Yeah, just… don’t creep up on pregnant people, okay? Kinda wanna keep this one inside for quite a while longer.” He started brushing his teeth next to Louis, who did the same. They rinsed off and Harry hovered while he waited for Louis to leave the bathroom.

“Um, I just wanted to thank you again for today… for holding my hand when I got scared, and being there-“

“Haz, you don’t need to thank me, or Jess. We love having you here, and we want to help, as much as you want us to, of course.”

“Okay, well, thank you,” Harry mumbled again. “Sleep well, Lou.”

Louis practically glowed at Harry’s use of his nickname, and patted his arm in a friendly way. “Night, love. See you tomorrow.”

Harry slipped inside his bedroom and huddled down in his bed, trying to get warm again. He laid on his back, blankets pulled up to his chin. It was odd. Once Steve had left the flat, it had very quickly stopped feeling like home for Harry. But Louis and Jess’ house… it was nice. Harry was starting to feel a bit more like he could be happy here, comfortable even. The last thought to enter his mind before he fell asleep was that one day, if he was really lucky, it may even start to feel like home.


	3. 16-21 weeks

Louis sighed as he closed the front door behind him. It had been a stressful day at work, arguing with his colleagues over the direction of an article he was writing, and he was pleased when permission to work from home for the rest of the day was granted. Louis knew being in the office while he was in a bad mood only led to trouble. He kicked off his shoes, not caring that they weren’t lined up nearly as Jess preferred and sloped through to the sitting room, trying to ignore the buzzing of his phone in his pocket, knowing it would only be work emails.

He stopped dead when he looked across and saw Harry on the sofa, lying on his side, sound asleep. His hand was draped over his exposed bump thanks to the jumper that had ridden up slightly, and Louis took a moment to look at the expanse of soft, pale skin, the way it swelled lightly, and rose and fell with each of Harry’s breaths. Even his slightly distorted laurel tattoos at his hips that Louis only saw for the first time at the scan looked perfect. Louis felt like he was privvy to something private and special, and reached across, pulling a blanket that was on the back of the sofa down until it was draped over Harry’s body.

Louis didn't see the point in waking him up just yet, clearly his body was exhausted from work, college and growing a baby, so he left him to it, pushing a few curls away from Harry’s sweaty forehead with a gentle touch. He crept through to the kitchen, setting up his laptop on the table before he prepared himself a cup of tea, making sure to be as quiet as possible so Harry could sleep.

After a couple of hours, and now with a crick in his neck, Louis logged off and shut down his computer. Harry was still dozing, and Louis knew that if he didn't wake Harry up soon, he’d never get to sleep that night. He crouched down next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, shaking him gently.

“Harry, love, time to wake up,” he said, and Harry sniffed, not waking up. Louis smiled and continued to talk, hoping to stir Harry without needing to get any more physical. “Harry, come on, up you get.”

“Lou?” came Harry’s voice, sleepy and low, Louis desperately trying not to feel too fond over it. “Oh god, I’m sorry-”

“Don’t apologise, growing humans is tiring work, you needed the rest. But I think if you don’t get up now, you won’t sleep tonight and you’ll hate me for having let you sleep.”

“I couldn’t hate you, Lou,” Harry said, struggling to sit up, pushing the blanket off his body. Louis stood and helped Harry, ignoring the spark of something that flooded through him as his hand grazed the firm skin of Harry’s bump. Harry looked down, obviously having felt it too and flushed, pulling his jumper down, covering himself. Louis helped him to his feet and watched as Harry stretched, pushing his hair back out of his face. “I must look a right state…”

“You don’t,” Louis replied, turning away to give Harry a few moments to get himself together. “Want a drink? Water? Tea?”

“Water, please.” Harry followed Louis back to the kitchen and accepted the glass gratefully, drinking half of it down quickly, wiping his mouth off on the back of his hand. “Thanks, Lou. You’re home early? Everything okay?”

“Yeah, just work shit,” Louis mumbled as he peered into the fridge, wondering what he could make for dinner. “God, I’m crap at this. What can I make from these ingredients?” Harry laughed lightly and stepped over, standing behind Louis as he looked into the fridge, the slight swell of his bump resting against’ Louis’ back. Louis swallowed and tried to not react, enjoying the sensation of Harry in such close proximity to himself.

“Well, you’ve got enough stuff for a nice salad, and you have chicken… we could make a chicken caesar salad? I’m sure you have stuff for the dressing, we got lots when we went shopping the other day.”

“Sounds good. Gonna help me? If you’re not too tired, I mean.”

“I’d love to.” Louis grinned and started taking things out of the fridge as Harry drifted over, grabbing a few things from the cupboard and setting them on the counter. “You wanna talk about it?”

“What?” Louis asked, flicking his confused eyes over to Harry who was pouring a few things into a bowl, stirring them with a small whisk.

“Work, whatever was bothering you.”

“Not really. It’ll be fine, but thank you. I did, however, want to talk to you…”

“Sounds ominous,” Harry mumbled, watching Louis chop the chicken into strips. He stepped over to a cupboard and grabbed a frying pan, preheating it on the hob. “Have I done something wrong?”

“Why do you always assume- no, love. Of course not. I’m just worried about you, and how much you’re working. If you’re not at college, you’re at work. It’s a lot, and you’re exhausted, I can see it. What would you say if I suggested maybe cutting back?”

“I’d say no, Louis. I need to earn money to pay my way-”

“Harry, we’ve been through this. Jess and I don’t want money, and surely your health is your priority? Have you even told them you’re pregnant yet?” Judging by the sheepish expression on Harry’s face, he hadn’t. “Oh love. You have to tell them, there’s laws and things they have to follow to protect you and the baby, and you’ll be entitled to certain things as well.”

Harry sighed and stopping chopping the peppers in front of him, resting his hands on the worktop. “I know. I do, I’m not stupid, it’s just…” He looked over to Louis then, his eyes wide and open. “I’m scared, Lou. I don’t want to lose my job.”

Louis felt a little surprised that Harry had opened up to him, and he felt like somehow this was a big thing for Harry to admit. He bit back the urge to grab Harry and hug him and instead continued to stir the chicken in the pan with his wooden spoon, pleased to see Harry had gone back to his task. “They can’t sack you for having a baby, love. That’s illegal. But you do have to tell them. I can come with you, if you like?”

“No, thank you. I can… I can do this on my own. I’m working tomorrow, I’ll talk to my boss then.”

“If you have any trouble, you call me, okay? I won’t let them muck you around, Haz.” The front door closed, signalling the arrival of Jess, and Louis smiled over to Harry, telling him quietly that this would be kept between them. “Hello, love,” he called, kissing Jess’ cheek as she stepped over in her bare feet, and he watched how she smiled carefully at Harry, maintaining her distance and not touching Harry as he had done earlier. It struck him as odd but he said nothing, focusing on cooking again. “Harry’s helping me make chicken salad for dinner.”

“Sounds lovely. I’ll just go and get changed.” Louis nodded and she quietly left the kitchen, leaving the pair alone again.

“Thank you. For keeping that between us,” Harry muttered as he popped the leaves of the lettuce into a salad spinner after rinsing them under the tap. “I just… I’m used to keeping my business to myself. It’s odd, to share things with someone.”

“It’s not a problem. Unless it affects the baby, you don’t have to tell us anything, you know that?” He saw Harry nod out of the corner of his eye, and he looked up, sharing a smile with the boy. “Right, let’s get this done and eat, yeah? I’m starving!”

*

“Lou!” Harry smiled as he slid into the passenger seat next to Louis after his shift, a wide smile on his face. Harry felt good, and he didn't even bother to hide his joy, knowing in a few minutes, Louis would be just as happy as he was. He pulled his seatbelt over his body, making sure it wasn’t directly across his tummy before he realised Louis was staring at him with a strange expression on his face. “What? What did I do?”

“Nothing. It’s just…. It’s nice to see you smiling,” Louis said with a shrug, and turned his body so he was facing Harry. “What’s put that grin on your face?”

“I did it! I spoke to my boss, I told him I was pregnant, and he’s reduced my shifts and is sorting out paternity pay and leave. Oh my god, I can’t believe I did it.”

He was stunned when Louis suddenly surged forwards and wrapped him up in a hug. Harry froze for a moment before he brought his own arms up, looping them around Louis’ neck quickly before they separated. Harry could feel his cheeks were hot and he smiled shyly at Louis, pleased to see a smile on his face. “I am so proud of you, love. I know it wasn’t easy for you but you did it. Is that the first person you’ve told about being pregnant?”

“Yeah. I was so scared, Lou but he was so kind. He asked about the baby, and when I was due and stuff. I told him about you and Jess, and he added you as my emergency contacts in case something happens at work. I mean, maybe I should have asked, is that okay-”

“Of course, you don’t ever need to ask. At least I know they have to look after you now. What about the shifts, what did they say?”

“Well, he asked if the late shifts were too much, and I didn't want to say but he must have sensed it. He switched the four late ones for two afternoon ones. I’m earning a bit less but I think it’ll be better for me.”

“I agree. Good idea, love. We need to celebrate. I think takeaway night for sure, my treat. What do you want?”

“Um, pizza?” he mumbled as Louis started the engine, noticing the smile that crossed Louis’ face at that suggestion. “I’m really in the mood for cheese.” He laughed in an embarrassed manner at that and put his head in his hands. “I used to eat so healthy, this baby just craves the junk, I swear.”

“Excuse you, don’t call my favourite meal junk food,” Louis admonished, making Harry laugh out loud, heading towards their favourite pizza restaurant. “Oh, it might just be you and me for the dinner, Jess text before I came to get you, she has to stay late, they’re working on a big case.”

“Oh, okay. Well, we can save her some, she can eat it later,” Harry said, looking at the road as Louis drove. “Thanks though, for encouraging me to talk to work. I know I should’ve done it beforehand…”

“Hey, that doesn’t matter. You’ve done it now and that’s what counts.” Louis’ stomach gurgled loudly then, interrupting their silence and his eyes flew open, Harry struggling to contain his laugh. “Um… oops?” They both fell apart then, laughing loudly in the car as Louis pulled over in front of the pizza place, wiping tears from his eyes. “Come on then, let’s go before my hungry belly starts embarrassing me even more…”

Harry just laughed again as they walked into the takeaway, Louis quickly ordering and paying while they waited for their food. It didn't take long for the food to be ready and they headed home, the warm box of food by Harry’s feet. They ate in the living room with plates on their laps, the pizza box open on the coffee table. Harry had already taken out a few slices and wrapped them in foil for Jess later on, and now they were both watching trashy TV, eating and joking with each other.

After a little while, Harry yawned and Louis hustled him off to bed, promising to tidy up and not leave greasy pizza boxes around. Harry reluctantly listened and thanked Louis for the pizza before he went upstairs, slipping out of his work uniform and into his comfy shorts and a tank top. He was getting less conscious about showing a bit more flesh around Louis and Jess, choosing comfort in his pregnancy over concealing every inch of himself. He also tended to get dressed before he headed downstairs for breakfast, so really, no-one saw him dressed like this except him.

He read his book again for a while, but the greasy, salty pizza was playing havoc on his body. He was soon thirsty after a while and decided to creep downstairs to get a glass of water, silently cursing the fact he hadn’t thought ahead before he’d gone upstairs. His feet and ankles were aching again, and he really just wanted to be back in bed and resting, knowing he had an early start with college again.

He paused outside Louis and Jess’ room as he heard raised voices, and although he shouldn’t, he started to listen when he heard his name, slightly worried to find out what they were talking about. It didn't sound good, and Harry’s stomach started turning over with nerves.

“... just so proud of him, you know? It was so hard for him to do that but he did.”

“Yeah, I know Louis. How many bloody times do you have to say you’re so fucking proud of every little thing he does?”

“Sorry, what?”

“Harry. It’s all you go on about at the moment. How wonderful he is, and how great he is, and how proud you are…”

“Oh, well sorry if I’m enjoying getting to know the person carrying our child, Jessica. I just want him to be comfortable here with us…”

Harry let out a shaky breath as he continued walking, feeling sick at what he’d heard. He knew Louis was proud of him, that much wasn’t a secret thanks to the conversation they’d had in the car. But he was surprised at Jess’ reaction to Louis’ words, and it upset him that he had caused an argument between the couple. With a shaky hand, he got a glass of water and headed back to his room, his stomach lurching again.

Before he knew it, he could feel bile rising in his throat and barely had time to slam the glass of water down onto the banister, clamping a hand over his mouth as he pushed the bathroom door open and emptied his stomach into the toilet. He tried to be as quiet as he could, kicking the door shut with one of his feet, and retched a few more times before he stood, grabbing a few pieces of toilet paper to wipe his mouth with.

He flushed the toilet and quickly brushed his teeth, hating the feeling of being sick. He sat on the edge of the bath for a few minutes, trying to calm his nerves, hoping that he wouldn’t encounter Louis or Jess on his short walk back to his bedroom. Knowing they were arguing about him made him feel really uncomfortable, and if he was honest, he was upset by the way Jess had bitten back at Louis.

Quietly, he pulled the bathroom door open and crept down the hallway, picking up the glass as he did so. There were no more voices behind Louis’ bedroom door which calmed Harry slightly, and he closed his door as carefully as he could, turning around to set the glass of water down on his bedside table. He pulled off the tank top he was wearing and threw it into his laundry basket, sitting on the edge of his mattress.

He cupped his hands around the small swell of his belly, noticing how his hands encompassed most of it. A feeling of being overwhelmed suddenly hit Harry, and he couldn’t stop the small sob escaping his lips, tears beginning to fall. He was scared that if he ruined this, he’d be homeless and alone with a baby he had no means of raising. Things had to work out with Louis and Jess, they just had to.

Harry continued to sit and cry, rubbing his bump, hoping the baby inside him would feel the love he was desperately trying to pass through with his touches. He wore himself out to the point where he just slumped back on the bed, unwilling to remove his hands from his bump. His sobs slowly subsided, and the damp pillow under his cheeks felt uncomfortable, but Harry laid there, blinking up into the darkness, wondering what on earth he was going to do come morning.

*

“Louis. Lou, wake up.” Jess whispered, voice cutting through Louis’ sleep and he stirred, pushing her off and rolling onto his side, just wanting to fall back asleep. The room was still dark, the sun hadn’t yet risen and for him, that meant it wasn’t time to be up yet. However, his wife was insistent, and it was a swift kick to his thigh that fully woke him up in the end.

“Ow, what the fuck?” he mumbled, reaching under the cover to rub the sore muscle, stilling when he heard a strange noise in the background. “Shit, what’s that?”

“I think it’s Harry…” she whispered back, and Louis sat up, flicking on his bedside light, listening out until the familiar sound of retching could be heard again. “Is that, is that normal Lou? He hasn’t been sick before, maybe he needs to go to the midwife-”

“No, it’s probably just morning sickness. I’ll go and see if he’s okay. You staying here?”

“I’ll come in a sec, let me get some clothes on.” Louis nodded and swung his legs out of bed, grateful he’d slept in shorts and a tank top last night, and opened their bedroom door, squinting into the brightness of the landing light. The bathroom door was pushed nearly shut, but a sliver of light was peeking through, and Louis hesitantly headed up to the door, knocking gently.

“Harry, love, are you alright? Can I come in?”

“No!” Harry’s voice sounded rough and upset, and Louis’ heart broke. “Please don’t, I’m a mess and-” He retched loudly again, and Louis winced slightly at the sound of vomit hitting the water in the toilet.

“I don’t care, let me help you, please?” There was no reply so Louis took that as a sign and slowly pushed his way in. What he saw made him want to cry. Harry was on his knees on the bathroom floor, hunched over the toilet, gripping the porcelain with tight hands. His hair was a mess atop his head, and when Harry finally met his eyes, he wanted to do nothing but help. His eyes were red-rimmed from crying, and his cheeks were flushed.

“Oh god, I look awful, I, I’m so sorry Lou-” Harry started to cry again and Louis rushed forwards, gently pushing Harry’s hair back from his face, stroking his back gently as he remembered his mum used to like when she suffered with sickness in her pregnancies.

“Hey, you look fine, love. It’ll take more than a bit of sickness to scare me off, I’ve seen my Mum through two twin pregnancies. I am literally immune to it all by now.” He chuckled to himself and reached over for a towel, seeing Harry’s hand scrabble to cover himself a bit. Louis’ eyes quickly raked over the expanse of black ink littering Harry’s skin before he draped the towel around his body, covering him up. Harry’s eyes were full of gratitude, and Louis just sat, comforting as Harry dry-heaved some more, probably not having much more to give.

“Oh jesus-” Louis looked to see Jess at the door, a hand over her mouth, a greenish tinge to her skin. He threw her an annoyed look and jerked his head, telling her to leave.

“Can you get Harry a drink of water and some clean clothes from his room, please?” She nodded and hurried away, pulling the door closed behind her. “Sorry, she doesn’t do well with sick people. You think you’re done, Hazzy?”

Louis paused for a second at the slip but Harry didn't seem to notice. Instead, he nodded and gently pulled back, sitting down on the cool tiled floor, keeping the towel wrapped tightly around his body. Louis flushed the loo and picked up a green flannel from the side of the sink, soaking it in warm water before he gently wiped it over Harry’s face, seeing the man’s hands were still trembling, aftershocks of his violent sickness still present.

“Let’s get you up and changed, okay? Let me help you.” He stood in front of Harry and held out his hands. He watched as Harry battled internally with what to do. There was no way he could have Louis help him up without dropping the towel, and eventually he sighed, clearly realising he had no choice. He let the towel fall to the floor and placed his hands inside Louis’. Louis braced himself and pulled Harry to his feet, smiling as Harry got his balance. “There we go. Let me just…” He bent over and picked up the towel, Harry smiling gratefully, but Louis couldn’t help but notice he didn't bother to cover himself as quickly, just holding it against his body.

“Love the butterfly tattoo by the way,” Louis mentioned as they headed out of the bathroom. Louis was pleased to see a fresh glass of water in Harry’s room as they went inside, Harry pulling on a clean t-shirt. “Any reason for that one?”

“Um, new beginnings, I guess?” Harry said, sipping at the water. “Fuck, I hate being sick… thought I might have missed the morning sickness but I’m not that lucky.”

“Yeah, Mum didn't get sick until later on with Ernest and Doris. She had it really bad, ended up having injections to prevent sickness, bless her. She’s a fighter, though, and took it all in her stride. You ready to head downstairs now, Harold?”

“M’not Harold,” Harry muttered as he walked down the stairs. Louis glanced up at it, hearing a hint of a smile in the man’s voice, seeing him trying to fight back a smile. “S’just Harry.”

“If you say so,” Louis teased, poking his tongue out at Harry as they headed into the kitchen. They sat at the kitchen table, Harry now clutching another glass of water, refusing any attempts of Louis and Jess trying to get him to eat.

“Trust me, a piece of plain toast won’t do any harm, it’ll settle your tummy,” Louis said, looking down at how exhausted Harry looked. “You have college this morning, don’t you?” Harry just nodded, his curls bouncing around, wild without a headscarf or hairband holding them back. “I think you should maybe stay home today, if it’s something you can miss?”

“Um, well, it’s just a study session, so I guess I can do that at home? I’ll email my tutor.”

“Good. Do you, um, do I need to stay home with you?”

“No, Lou,” Harry laughed, catching Jess’ eye and smiling slightly. “I’m a big boy, I can be home alone.” Jess headed over and set a piece of toast in front of Harry before she sat down behind her own breakfast.

“Just call me or Lou if you need anything, or you get sick again? Well, if you’re sick, probably best you call Louis, to be honest…” They all laughed at that, and Harry felt slightly better as he started to nibble at the plain toast, feeling like his tummy was finally settling. His muscles ached from the heaving but he tried to push that aside, pleased that the atmosphere between Jess and Louis from last night seemed to have passed.

“I’m really sorry to dash but I have an early editorial meeting, see you both for dinner?” Harry and Jess nodded as Louis pushed away, about to grab his dirty dishes but Harry stopped him.

“Leave it. I’ll clear away when you’ve both gone to work, I’d rather keep busy for a while.” Louis nodded in thanks and minutes later, called out goodbye before he left, Jess following him out of the house shortly after. Harry set about clearing away, putting the mugs and plates in the dishwasher before wiping the table and sitting back down at it with a pile of text books and a notepad.

His day passed by uneventfully. He found a can of soup in the cupboard that he heated up for lunch, and was pleased he managed to keep it down. He’d just put his books away, brain swimming with information when he heard the door open. He glanced at his phone screen, puzzled as it was mid-afternoon and he wasn’t expecting Louis or Jess home for a couple of hours yet. Louis poked his head in from the hall, grinning as he threw his bag onto the armchair.

“Hello, you. How are you feeling?” Harry watched as Louis shrugged off his blazer, trying desperately to ignore the curve of Louis’ waist, and the tanned stomach that was exposed as he stretched up onto his tiptoes, his back cracking slightly as he did so. There was something about Louis’ skin that made Harry want to touch it, and he shoved his hands under his thighs to ignore the twitch of his fingers.

“You’re home early, and I’m fine,” Harry said, watching as Louis slumped down into the chair, pulling his socked feet up onto the coffee table. “Why are you home?”

“Well, I’d done the majority of my work, and I wanted to check on you, make sure you hadn’t been sick again.”

“You’ve been texting me all day, and I told you I was fine…” Harry replied, secretly loving the attention Louis was giving him. He adjusted his body so he was facing Louis, and smiled softly. “It’s nice you care, though. You want a cuppa or anything?”

“I’m okay, thanks, love, had one before I left the office.” He sighed and tilted his head back. “I’m glad you’re okay, though. Wasn’t nice seeing you upset this morning. And before you even try, don’t apologise. You can’t help getting sick, you’re pregnant.”

“Well, it wasn’t my finest moment,” Harry admitted, laughing softly. “But… Louis. Thank you, for, um… well, for being there and the towel.... It meant a lot you did that.”

“I could see you were getting self-conscious, I just wanted you to be comfortable. Although, Haz, you don’t have to be that way around me, or Jess. You don’t have to be ashamed or whatever you feel about your body. Your little belly is really cute, and to be blatantly honest, I think your tattoos are sick.”

Harry laughed shyly at that, covering his face with his hands. “Feels like years since I got them. I didn't think about how stretched out they’re gonna be as the baby gets bigger. Hopefully they’ll ping back after and not be all distorted.” He paused for a moment, considering his words before he spoke. “It’s just a lot. My body is changing, and it’s out of my control. It’s a strange feeling. But I’ll try not to hide away, I will.”

“You do what’s right for you, love,” Louis replied, a small smile on his lips. “I mean, Jess might draw the line at you strutting around naked, but neither of us will be offended if you flash the flesh every now and then.”

“Oh my god, stop,” Harry giggled, blushing at Louis’ words, loving how comfortable he felt. “Hey, do you wanna watch that episode of The Great British Bake Off that we recorded the other night? We’ve got a little while before I have to start dinner and Jess will be home.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Louis grinned back, nodding his head. “You never know, I might learn a thing or two!”

“Louis, there’s not enough episodes in the world to teach you about baking,” Harry said with a roll of his eyes, ignoring Louis’ splutters of protest as he hit play, the familiar theme tune ringing through the sitting room. A sudden thought hit Harry then, curled up on the sofa, Louis just along from him. Harry felt at home.

*

Harry pushed down the wave of nausea threatening to overcome him as he headed downstairs, wishing this part of his pregnancy could be over already. He opened a cupboard door, picking out a tall glass when a small noise behind him made him jump. He whirled around to see Jess sitting at the table, clutching a hand to his chest in shock.

“Shit, sorry, I should’ve let you know I was here,” she began, clearly worrying about Harry’s reaction. “Hey, sit down with me for a sec?”

He nodded and smiled. There was something about his relationship with Jess that unsettled Harry. He wasn’t as comfortable with her as he was around Louis, and that grated on him. He felt like he needed to get to know her more but he wasn’t sure how. He sipped at his water as she suddenly got up from the table, returning with a plastic bag she put down in front of Harry. He frowned over to her, wondering where this was going.

“First of all, I just wanted to apologise for how badly I dealt with your morning sickness yesterday. It was nothing personal, I promise. I can’t deal with people being sick, and it took me by surprise. I’m just glad Lou was there to help you out.”

“It’s fine, I get it,” Harry mumbled, hating that she felt bad about it. He understood - he wasn’t a fan of sickness himself, but sadly, he couldn’t escape it right now. “I won’t hold it against you or anything…”

She chuckled and nodded. “Well. Since I’m not much good with that side of it, I did a little research. Um… look in the bag.” Harry grabbed the handle and peered inside before he reached in, pulling out the few items and setting them down on the wooden table in front of him. “I don’t know if they work, but these were the things that came up when I was looking up things to help ease morning sickness.”

Harry was shocked for a moment, looking at the things in front of him. There was a box of ginger tea-bags, a couple of different packets of crackers, and a box of ice-pops he needed to put into the freezer. He picked up the tea-bags, quickly reading the side before he looked up at Jess. His heart felt full at the way she’d gone out of her way to not only research but go out and buy these things to help him.

“I just… I don’t know what to say. Thank you, so much. I’m at the point where I’ll try anything, so this is amazing. Thank you, Jess.”

“You’re more than welcome. It’s the least I can do considering what you’re doing for us. Can I get you any breakfast?” Harry nodded and watched as she stepped over to the toaster, sliding in a few slices of bread. “I have a bit of a proposition for you, actually.”

“Oh?” Harry’s curiosity was piqued, and he followed Jess as she headed to the fridge, removing the butter and her jar of strawberry jam, the one Louis proclaimed was sent straight from hell because it had lumps in. He hadn’t been amused when Harry had laughed at that, calling him a child because he didn't like lumps of fruit in his fruit jam.

“I’ve got a day off today, time in lieu because of the overtime I’ve been putting in. So I was planning on heading to the out of town retail park and popping in John Lewis and Mothercare to look at some furniture and baby bits. I was wondering if you wanted to tag along if you weren’t busy?”

“You… you want me to come with you?” Harry subconsciously reached down, cupping his belly at the mention of the baby, and he saw Jess’ eyes follow the motion, resting on his ever-growing stomach. “You don’t have to-”

“I know. I want you to. We haven’t spent a lot of time together, not as much as you have with Lou, and I’d like to get to know you.”

“I’d like that to,” Harry spoke quietly, suddenly feeling shy. She turned back to her task, buttering the toast before she set a plate down in front of Harry. “Is Lou coming?”

“He has to work, it’ll just be us. Is that okay?”

“Of course,” Harry replied, smiling as she sat down opposite him. They ate breakfast and both got dressed, Harry quickly showering, the feeling of nausea finally having passed. He dried his hair, knowing if he didn't, he’d end up with a cold and he couldn’t afford to get sick, not for the sake of the baby. They both waved Louis off to work before they headed out themselves, Harry feeling slightly apprehensive about the shopping excursion.

Jess drove them out to the retail park and parked her car in front of the shops. Harry carefully got out and adjusted his jacket, trying to hide his bump a bit. They hovered outside Mothercare for a moment before Harry gave the nod, telling Jess it was okay to go in. He hadn’t stepped foot in a baby store since he’d gotten pregnant, and suddenly felt emotional and overwhelmed at the baby items littered around, other pregnant men and women milling around, holding their partners hands. Harry suddenly felt quite alone.

“Hey? Are you okay?” Jess asked, stepping over to Harry and laying a hand on his arm. He exhaled and nodded, pulling his face into a tight smile. “Shall we go and look at the furniture first? Then we could look at some pushchairs and car seats.”

“Sounds good,” Harry mumbled, following her, a hand on his belly. He knew his belly was big enough now he couldn’t hide it, and it felt like the eyes of everyone there were on him and Jess. They walked around for a while, Harry running his hands along the smooth wooden sides of the cots they walked past. It felt odd to him to be here, knowing he’d have no part in raising this baby, but at the same time, he didn't feel like he could say that to Jess, aware that her inviting him along was a big step in building some sort of the relationship between the two of them.

“Hi there, can I help you and your wife with anything?” Harry swung around in horror as he realised the shop assistant was talking to him, and even Jess seemed speechless, both glancing at each other before Harry found his tongue.

“Um, we’re not- she’s, um-”

“We’re not married,” Jess said, a certain steel to her voice that Harry hadn’t expected. “We’re just looking for now, anyway. But thank you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t assume. Just let me know if you need any help,” the woman said, bustling away, clearly embarrassed by her mistake. Harry turned away and wandered over to a changing table, setting his hands down and gathering himself for a minute. After a few moments, he started walking around again, his mind a bit boggled by the amount of baby paraphernalia littered around, things he had no idea how to use, or even what they were for. Of course, most of it wouldn’t apply to him, they were things that Jess and Louis would be putting to use, and the thought filled him with a sadness he couldn’t shift.

Harry followed Jess as she walked around the baby clothes, touching items as she wove around the aisles, picking up a couple of tops with cute slogans on. Harry swallowed down the lump in his throat, pushing away the dark thoughts in his mind as he watched her smile fondly at the tiny clothes, clearly imagining putting her son or daughter in them in a few months time.

She must have sensed she was being watched because she turned around, giving Harry a small smile. He tried to return it but failed, hurrying away and waiting outside the building, the cool May air cooling down his warm skin.

“Harry?”

“Over here,” he called, leaning against the brick wall. “Sorry, it’s just… it’s hard.”

“I didn't think. I’m really sorry. Do you, um, want to go to the other shops, or…”

“Do you mind if you take me home? I’m sorry, I just… I’d like to be on my own right now.” She nodded, and they headed back to her car, the drive home quiet and a little bit awkward. Harry was feeling sick again, and he was sure it wasn’t morning sickness. Instead, it felt like a dull ache in his abdomen, one of dread, and fear that he’d really ruined things between him and Jess now.

When they arrived home, he slipped his shoes off and headed upstairs, collapsing onto his bed, fully dressed. He must have dozed off because the next thing he knew, he was being shaken awake by Louis. He rolled over, sleepily staring up at the man sat on the edge of his mattress, staring down at him with concerned eyes.

“Haz? You alright, love?”

“Mm,” Harry replied, rubbing wearily at his eyes. “Sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep.”

“It’s okay. Jess told me your trip wasn’t exactly a roaring success…” Harry shuffled backwards and sat up against the headboard, Louis staying exactly where he was. Harry sighed and nodded, hoping Louis wouldn’t hate him for upsetting his wife. “She… her heart was in the right place, you know? She didn't think how it might be hard for you to look at baby stuff given you won’t be… you know, raising your baby.”

Harry bit down hard on his lips as he felt the burn of tears behind his eyes, willing them not to fall, not wanting to fall apart in front of Louis yet again. “I just… I forget, sometimes. That the baby inside me isn’t actually mine. But I feel awful for upsetting her, she was just trying to be nice…”

“Don’t worry, she’s okay. She’s actually gone out to her Mum’s for a while, so it’s just us. You wanna stay up here, or come and watch some telly with me? Because I’m that nice, I’ll let you put on more of the Bake Off.”

“Well, how can I say no to that?” Harry asked, getting out of bed, holding his belly as a sharp pain shot across his tummy. “Ouch.”

“You okay? Something wrong?” Louis asked, hurrying back over from where he’d made his way to the door. “Is it the baby?”

“Nah, I think I just stood up too quick, muscle twinge. I’m fine, let’s go.”

They settled on the sofa together, the Bake Off playing in the background, Louis chuckling away at the banter between Mel and Sue, marvelling over the mess the contestants were making of whichever cake they were supposed to be baking. Harry shuffled over until their thighs were touching. He glanced over to Louis out of the corner of his eye, and was relieved to see his friend didn't seem bothered or disgusted by Harry touching him.

Harry kept moving closer until they were pressed up against each other, and finally, Louis took the hint, moving his body so he could drape an arm around Harry’s shoulder. Harry had missed the comfort of a cuddle from someone he felt safe with, and now Louis was giving him that, Harry just relaxed and let go. His head flopped down until it rested against Louis’ shoulder, curling up into the warmth. He was struggling to keep his eyes open, and promised himself he’d close his eyes but keep listening, wanting to know how the episode ended.

“... just let him sleep, he’s exhausted.” Harry stirred as he heard Louis’ voice speaking to someone softly. He didn't move, too comfortable to care and he twitched his fingers, curling into the fabric of what he thought must be Louis’ top.

“And you need to be that close with him, do you?” Harry couldn’t help his muscles tensing at her tone, and he could feel Louis’ fingers dig further into his side, almost as if he were protecting Harry.

“Jess, leave it. It’s just a hug, stop reading into it. When he wakes up, I’ll move. Until then, I’m comfy and so is Harry and the baby. Leave it be.”

“Whatever.” Harry heard the clacking of her heels on the floor until there was silence again. Once more, Harry felt as if he’d intruded into something private behind Louis and Jess, another argument that was down to him. Slowly, he started to bring himself round from his second nap of the day, using the firm muscles of Louis’ stomach to push into as he sat himself up. He quite liked the firm feeling underneath his palm, and flicked his eyes up to Louis, smiling sleepily up at him.

“I’m really sorry I slept against you. And, um, about what Jess said, I’m sorry for that too. I didn't mean to make her uncomfortable.”

“I’m not sorry, and you didn't make her uncomfortable,” Louis answered, honesty present in his eyes. “You were tired and you needed comfort. There is nothing wrong with that, love. And Jess is tired, work is hard, and she’s taking it out on me. It’s fine, please don’t worry about it. But I’m sorry you had to hear that.”

“Thank you.” They shared a look for a moment before Harry eventually pulled away. “You give good cuddles.”

“Years of practise with my little sisters and brother. Anytime you want a cuddle, let me know. I’m quite the cuddler myself.” Harry loved how Louis was making him feel okay about this, showing him he didn't mind at all Harry seeking comfort from him. “Right, I’m gonna get up and make you a drink then see what we’ve got for dinner, okay?”

“Okay, thanks Lou,” Harry said, stretching up, strangely not minding when he could feel the hem of his top slide up his belly with his movement. He caught Louis’ eyes flicking down to the exposed bit of belly, and he gently cupped it. “Growing well, huh? Nineteen weeks tomorrow.”

“Wow, it’s going so fast. Nearly halfway. I can’t believe next week we get to see the baby again, I’m so excited.”

“Me too. You can still come right, you and Jess?”

“Nowhere else we’d rather be.” And with that, Louis gave Harry a wide smile and left the room, Harry trying to ignore the hushed conversation Louis and Jess were trying to having in the kitchen, most likely about him. Somehow, though, the fact he had Louis and his friendship made Harry feel calmer, and he snuggled back against the sofa, a small smile on his lips.

*

“Harry, are you ready to go, love?”

“Um, can you give me a minute, Lou?” Harry ripped open the parcel that had arrived yesterday, shaking out the bags inside, trying not to grin too widely. He’d been struggling to pull a couple of his band t-shirts over his ever-growing bump so had finally used some of his paycheck to splash out on a couple of paternity t-shirts.

He opened a navy blue one and held it up, pleased with the design he’d chosen, and yanked his tank top over his head, throwing it onto his bed. He pulled the new one over his head, smoothing it down before he stepped over to the mirror. He bit his lip, not sure how to feel about the sight that greeted him.

The top was tight, was the thing. It clung to his bump much more prominently than anything else he owned, and there was absolutely no denying he was pregnant now. He placed his hands on his stomach, cradling it either side as he moved around, looking at himself from every angle. He didn't seem to have put on weight anywhere else other than his belly, but still, it was quite a confronting image.

There was a soft knock at the door and Harry called for whoever it was to come in, whirling around when he saw Louis in the doorway.

“I just- wow. You look-”

“It’s awful, isn’t it? It’s fine, I’ll send it back-”

“No. Don’t you dare. You look amazing… your belly. Wow.” Louis stepped over, running his eyes over Harry’s body again. “Harry, honestly, you look fantastic. It’s a proper bump now, isn’t it? Do you like the top? Is it new?”

Harry nodded, suddenly feeling shy and very exposed in front of Louis. “I just… it makes it feel more real, you know? To wear something tight that shows off my belly. I don’t fit in many of my clothes now, so I thought I’d order a few new things, but this isn’t quite what I imagined.”

“But do you like it?”

“I do.” Harry was surprised that he admitted that, but there was something nice about the way the fabric moulded itself to his round tummy without feeling too restrictive. He ran his hands over himself again, smiling shyly up at Louis.

“Then wear it. You were whatever you feel confident in. If that’s baggy tops or tighter ones, it doesn’t matter. You need to feel happy and good in whatever you wear.” He glanced over to the small pile of other packages on the bed. “You’ll have to try them on later and show me and Jess. If you want to, I mean. We can give you our opinion.”

“I’d like that, thanks Lou,” Harry said. “Um, can you cut the tag out for me? I want to wear this one today.” He bent down slightly and watched Louis reach for the scissors on his side table, snipping it out quickly, tucking the label at the back of the neck back inside. Goosebumps sprung up as their skin made contact, and Harry held his breath as Louis fluffed up his curls at the back of his head.

“Beautiful.”

“Um, thank you, are you ready to go?”

“I am if you are,” Louis said, heading to the door and holding it open, letting Harry walk past him. “Let’s go see that baby again!”

The drive over to the hospital didn't take very long. Because it was one of the main scans, they’d been booked in at the hospital rather than Harry’s doctors surgery, and it suddenly all felt very real as they took a seat in the waiting room. There was lots of pregnant men and women sat around, a few children sat quietly with their parents, others playing with toys on the floor. Harry watched them with fond eyes before he heard his name, nervously getting to his feet.

“Where’s Jess? I don’t want her to miss it,” Harry said, fretting over the fact Jess had been running later, and promised to meet them at the hospital.

“She’ll be here, don’t worry. Let’s go, though. Don’t want to miss our slot.” Louis laid a gentle hand on Harry’s lower back and they walked together up the corridor. Louis’ hand was a grounding presence, and when they stopped as a midwife unlocked a door, Harry pushed back into it slightly, enjoying the warmth and pressure, wishing for a second Louis could slide his hand up under his top and touch his skin. His hands were perfect, small and delicate, yet strong and safe. Harry had dreamt too many times of how Louis’ hand would feel in his own.

He shook himself back to reality as Louis called his name, the pair stumbling in through the door. Harry silently berated himself for those thoughts as Louis explained to the midwife his wife was running late. Louis belonged to Jess, he was married, and there was no chance he’d ever want someone like Harry anyway. It was just a crush, Louis was showing him kindness and Harry was reading too much into it. He tuned back in as the midwife offered to do the blood draws and other measurements before Jess hopefully arrived.

Harry stood while she measured his belly and took his weight, asking Harry a few general health questions, some frankly too embarrassing to answer in front of Louis, and he appreciated how Louis paid a lot of attention to his phone screen as Harry mumbled his way through the mortifying answers. Eventually, they couldn’t put it off any longer and they stepped into another room with a bed and a scanner to the side.

“Okay poppet, if you can get up onto the bed and lift your top, we’ll take a look at your little one.” Harry nodded, and appreciated how Louis held out his hands as he lifted himself on the bed, turning so he was laid down. Nervously, he pulled his top up, exposing the expanse of his stomach as the midwife popped out of the room, sighing when she realised the room had no gel for the scanner. Harry’s eyes remained fixed on the ceiling but he blinked quickly as he felt something he hadn’t expected.

He looked down and saw a stunned looking Louis resting one of his hands across Harry’s bare belly, just staring at it. Harry couldn’t quite place the expression on Louis’ face, but he bit his lip, feeling overcome with emotion at how Louis was touching him. His hand looked tiny on his tummy, and Harry tried not to react as Louis started to stroke back and forth slowly, shaking his head slightly.

All of a sudden, the door burst open and Louis’ head snapped over, eyes widening when he saw Jess there and snatched his hand back, as if he had been doing something wrong. Harry coughed and smiled over to Jess, relieved that she’d made it after all.

“I’m so sorry, the client wouldn’t leave, and-” she panted, trying to catch her breath. “Have I missed it? Oh god, no-”

“No, we’re just about to start,” Louis mumbled, not stepping over to Jess at all, staying fixed at Harry’s side. They all jumped as the midwife came back in, a bottle of gel in her hand and a big smile on her face.

“Ah, you made it, excellent. Let’s make a start then. I’ll take my measurements first before I turn the screen around, so bear with me, okay?” They all nodded and sat in silence as they waited, Jess’ feet nervously tapping on the floor, Harry’s hands fiddling with the paper sheet underneath his body on the plastic hospital bed. “Right, everything looks great to me. Baby is growing on track, and I’m pleased with what I can see. Here we go.”

She spun the monitor around and all of them gasped, unable to believe the grainy image on the screen. In contrast to the tiny baby they’d seen weeks ago, this baby looked big. They were fully formed, and Harry could see the little arms flailing around on the screen. It was mesmerising to know that this baby was inside of him, and he felt tears trickle down his cheeks, unable to hold back. He released a shaky breath as Louis grabbed his hand, squeezing tightly, wordlessly offering the comfort Harry needed in that moment, and he’d never felt more grateful.

“Did you want to know the sex? I got a good look earlier, and I can tell you, if that’s what you want?”

Harry looked to Jess and Louis, wiping at his eyes with his free hand, a bit embarrassed at his show of emotion. “It’s, um, it’s up to you two. I don’t mind either way.”

“Then yes please. We’d love to know,” Jess answered, her eyes flitting nervously from Harry to the screen and back again.

“Okay, well in that case, congratulations, you’re having a baby girl.”

Harry just stared blankly at the screen, letting the thought that it was a girl growing inside of him sink in, Louis still clutching his hand as he turned his torso, offering comfort to a now crying Jess. He felt oddly detached from the situation, and didn't say anything as he cleaned off his tummy, watching Louis and Jess accept the scan photos that the midwife handed them. He got into the car quietly, and when they got home, cried off with a headache, slipping silently up the stairs, willing the tears not to fall until he was locked away where he could let his pain finally consume him.

*

Louis had barely been able to put down the scan photographs the midwife had handed him earlier. Jess had quickly propped one up on the mantelpiece, grinning at it whenever she walked past, and Louis clutched at a spare copy, intent on giving it to Harry later on. He was worried about him. The boy had gone quiet after the scan and had slipped upstairs, but Louis had chosen to leave him alone, thinking maybe he needed some time to process things.

Jess had gone back to work, but Louis had managed to wangle another day working from home. He hadn’t actually done any work yet, but that was beside the point. He was having a daughter. A baby girl. He’d grown up surrounded by females, so the thought didn't scare him at all. The fact the baby would probably look like Harry and have his curly brown locks and plump lips was a complete bonus, and Louis couldn’t shake the thought of raising Harry’s daughter out of his head.

With that in mind, he quietly headed up the stairs, stilling outside Harry’s room, listening for any sign that Harry was awake and not asleep. The mattress creaked for a moment so Louis rapped his knuckles gently on the wood. There was no reply, so he carefully lowered the handle, peering into the dark room. Harry had pulled the curtains and had his back to Louis. Louis assumed he was asleep and was about to creep back out, but something stopped him. He stepped over and hovered near Harry, seeing the shake of his torso again.

“Harry? What’s- are you crying? Oh love, what’s the matter?” Harry didn't reply, shaking his head, burying his face further into the pillow as Louis watched on helplessly. He reached out, putting a hand on Harry’s bicep, wishing there was more he could do. Without really thinking it through, he kicked off his shoes, and shuffled around, trying to get Harry to look at him. “Love, I’m going to lay down and give you a hug, is that okay?”

Harry sniffed and nodded, Louis grateful that he was accepting it so readily. He curled up behind Harry’s body, draping an arm around his belly, smiling softly as Harry felt for his hand, lacing their fingers together. There were no words spoken, there didn't need to be. Harry’s body began to shake as the tears began to fell, and Louis could do nothing but hold him through it, wishing he could take away whatever pain Harry was feeling.

After what felt like forever, Harry pushed back, Louis slumping onto his back, staying still as Harry rearranged his body, cosying up to Louis’ side, his head resting on his chest, one of Harry’s hands laying on Louis’ stomach. The curve of his bump was pressing into Louis’ side, and something about it all just felt right to Louis. He carded his fingers through Harry’s curls, looking over to him. He was startled by the sudden urge to kiss him and redirected his gaze to the ceiling.

“Harry… I’m worried about you, sweetheart. Will you please talk to me? Tell me what’s upsetting you?”

There was silence for a few more minute as Louis waited patiently for him to answer, not wanting to push Harry either way. His heart was full of love and sorrow for the man in his arms, and he hated feeling so helpless.

“I don’t get to see her grow up, Lou.” Louis’ heart broke as he dissolved into sobs, pushing their bodies closer together as he sought the comfort he so desperately needed, and Louis could feel himself losing control as his arms offered Harry a safe haven. He couldn’t help sliding his hand up under the edge of Harry’s top, rubbing at the soft skin on his back, wishing he could follow the path his hands were taking with his lips, show this boy how wonderful and special he was, how much-

“I… It hurts so much. I won’t know if she’ll get my hair, or Steve’s eyes, or whether she’ll be quiet like me, or outgoing like him. I won’t get to see it, and I just can’t-” he cried again, and Louis allowed himself to cry too, everything suddenly becoming too much. After a while, Louis rolled over so he was on his side, letting Harry push a leg between his, their bodies tangling so easily and thoughtlessly. One of Louis’ hands came to rest on Harry’s bump, and he started to talk, stroking his cheek with his free hand, aware this was probably entirely inappropriate, but it felt too right to stop, and Louis wasn’t sure he could, even if he wanted to.

“You will. You think I’m going to let her Daddy walk away, out of her life? No way, love. We want you to be a presence in her life, and in ours. Please don’t ever think we don’t want you around, either now, or when she’s here. Because we do… I do.” His breath hitched as he looked up, staring deeply into Harry’s green eyes, heart aching with how they were filled with tears. Louis’ tongue darted out and licked his lips, unable to break the trance. “Harry, I-”

A loud clap of thunder outside broke them apart, Harry pushing back from Louis to glance out of the window, both surprised by the heavy rainfall lashing down the window pane. Harry sighed and buried himself back against Louis, the moment entirely broken. Louis resumed his strokes on Harry’s back, the room silent between them.

“Oh, before I forget,” Louis said, wriggling around so he could slide the picture out of his back pocket. “I want you to have this. You deserve a picture as much as we do.” Harry’s shaking hand reached up, taking the small piece of paper from Louis’ hand, staring at it as he continued to sniff, still tucked up against Louis’ body. “She’s beautiful, Harry. I bet she’s going to have your curls, and your lovely green eyes. I love her already.”

“So do I,” Harry whispered, reaching across Louis to set the photo down on his bedside table before he closed his eyes, his head back on Louis’ chest. “Can we… can we just stay here for a bit? I just.. I need a hug. Please?”

“Of course, love. As long as you need. I’m not going anywhere.” And as the words left Louis’ lips, he realised exactly how true they were. He was sure right now that what he felt for Harry wasn’t what he should be feeling. It was more, and part of him really didn't want to shut it down, or push it away. Looking down at Harry’s face as he shut his eyes, Louis noticed the way his eyelashes curled, and his lips parted as he breathed softly, Louis realised he was in deep. And if he was honest, he wasn’t as scared of that realisation as he probably should have been.


	4. 22-28 weeks

“Harry? Are you free?” Jess’ voice carried easily down the quiet corridor, and Harry sat up from where he’d been laying on his bed, staring at the scan that had happened a week ago already. Harry’s belly felt huge today, and he carefully got onto his feet, placing a hand on his bump as he headed to the doorway.

“Everything alright?” he replied, not sure where Jess was, staying put so he wouldn’t see something he shouldn’t.

“Yeah, I just wanted your opinion, if you don’t mind? I’m in the spare room.” Harry swallowed, knowing Jess meant she was in the nursery, the room that would become their daughter’s when she made her arrival in just under eighteen weeks time. He stepped out towards the door and walked inside the room, seeing Jess stood in the middle, arms folded as she peered at the long wall opposite her.

“Hey,” Harry said, startling her from where she was looking at several pieces of paper taped to the wall.  “Ooh paint colours.” Jess turned and smiled, nodding at that. She walked over and pointed to two slightly different shades of yellow, her head turned around to look at Harry.

“I can’t decide. I don’t really want pink, I hate all that stereo-typing, that because she’s a girl, she must have a pink room. I think yellow is cheerful and bright. Which one do you like? The one on the right is called buttercup, and the left one is sunshine.”

“Hmm.” Harry stepped closer before going back and switching on the room’s light, changing the hue of the colours yet again. “Well, um, they’re both lovely. And I agree about pink and baby girl’s as well, although I have to admit I did love the pink clothes in the shop the other day.”

“Oh me too,” Jess said, turning around with a smile. “There’s a lot of choice though, I can already tell I’m going to spend a fortune on baby clothes. But we’re getting distracted. Paint. I’m leaning more towards the buttercup. I saw some lovely wall stickers the other day, butterflies and birds and things, I was thinking I could put them on the wall behind her cot.”

“That would look gorgeous,” Harry admitted, resting a hand on his swollen tummy, a slight twinge appearing again that Jess didn't miss. “No, I’m fine. It’s just my muscles stretching I think. I’m getting bigger by the day, I’m sure.” He rubbed his hand in circles, trying to ease the slight cramping sensation. “I like the buttercup too.” He watched as Jess headed over, sitting opposite the window, her knees pulled up and feet flat on the floor.

“Come and sit,” she said softly, patting the carpet next to her. Harry walked over and struggled down onto the floor, trying to get comfortable despite the large bump sticking out in front of him. His legs ended up flat, and Jess laid a hand on his thigh for a moment, peering over at him. “Harry, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for what happened at the shops last week. Lou spoke to me, told me why you found it so hard, and I’m really sorry. It was insensitive of me to ask you to do that, I didn't mean to upset you.”

“It’s okay-” Harry started but Jess stopped him, looking slightly upset now.

“No, it isn’t. I know this isn’t easy for any of us, but I haven’t thought enough about how hard this must be for you. I just want us to get on. I see you and Louis and how easily you two are around each other… I want that for us, too.”

“That would be nice,” Harry smiled back and took her hand, squeezing gently before he pulled away, not as happy with touching her as he was with Louis, not feeling he and Jess were in that place just yet. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Jess angled her body so she was facing Harry more, her body language open. “You can ask me anything.”

“Okay. Um, you and Louis… were you childhood sweethearts? You never speak much about your relationship, you don’t have to answer-”

“No, Harry, it’s fine. We met at school, Lou was 16 and I was 15. We were friends for a while before we started dating, nothing serious, we were too young. We did break up for a while, I think we just realised we were very young, and needed to spread our wings a bit, especially as Louis was heading off to Uni.” Harry nodded, trying to keep up with the story, but what Jess said next surprised him.

“I dated other guys for a while, but nothing serious. I know Louis was dating other people too, he had a fairly serious boyfriend for a while, which I wasn’t too happy about. He told me early on in our relationship that he was bisexual, but by the time I found out about the boyfriend, I was missing him a lot.” Harry nodded, trying not to react too hard to the news that Louis liked men as well as women, pushing away the little flicker of hope that was burning inside him.

“He came back from Uni for a break, and I text him, so we met up. We, well, we ended up in bed together, and I got pregnant. Bit careless, I was only 18 and Louis was 19 but there you go. We decided to get married and did it fairly quickly, just a small registry office wedding. I lost the baby a few weeks after-”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Harry said, taking her hand for a moment. She smiled slightly at him, clearly reminiscing.

“It’s okay, I dealt with it a long time ago. Anyway, we were both devastated, and decided after a little while to try again, but… it wasn’t meant to be, I guess. It’s been hard since then, dealing with the losses, it’s definitely affected our relationship.” She sighed at this point, looking a little wistful as she stared at the window. “Things aren’t what they used to be, shall we say. I’m just hoping that when we welcome our daughter, things will be okay again.”

“Um, I hope so, too. Thank you for trusting me, and telling me,” Harry said, shifting slightly thanks to a pain low in his back. “Ouch, I think I need to get up, this floor isn’t good for my back.” He carefully got to his feet, rubbing his belly with both hands, the bump protruding nicely in another of his new tops, one that Louis had proclaimed to be his favourite. “Do you want a cup of tea or something?”

“Yeah, that’d be good. Let’s go down, I’ll make it. Do you want one of the ginger ones? Has it been helping with your morning sickness?”

“It has actually,” Harry answered in a bright voice. His nausea had started to disappear again, much to his delight, and he felt much brighter for it, less like he wanted to bury his face in the pillow and not get up each morning.  “I haven’t been sick for a couple of days, I thought I would the other day when Lou bought home that bloody awful cinnamon thing from work-”

“Oh god, I hate that smell as well, he always tries to buy cinnamon candles near Christmas, I have to put my foot down with him and tell him no!” They both laughed at that, Harry imagining Louis’ sad little face when he was told he couldn’t have his favourite Christmas candle, mind slipping into thought of perhaps spending a Christmas with Louis at some point. Jess too, of course, and their daughter, but it was Louis’ face that filled his visions.

They sat and laughed and talked for a little while, Harry finally like he was breaking through a bit of a barrier that had been ever present between him and Jess since the beginning, until Louis came home from work.

“Hey, laughing about me, I suppose?” came Louis’ dulcet tones from the doorway, and Harry couldn’t quite help how he spun around with a big grin on his face, greeting Louis warmly. “How are you both doing?”

“Good, I’ve chosen a colour for the nursery with Harry’s help,” Jess said, smiling at her husband. Harry noticed that Jess didn't greet him with a hug or a kiss, instead just smiled before she headed off back upstairs, leaving him and Louis alone once more.

“Tea, Lou?” Harry asked, getting to his feet and waddling over to the kettle. He was well aware he was developing a waddle and to be honest, he loved it. It made him feel happy to look down and see his bump, and he rested his hands on it more times than he realised thanks to the fond looks Louis and Jess sent him as they watched him do so.

“Please, love,” Louis called in reply, starting to put the shopping away. “Oh, I got you some of that cream the midwife mentioned at the end of the appointment the other day, the one for your tummy.” There was no reply, and he quickly turned, suddenly worried something had happened to Harry. “You okay?”

“You… got me that cream?” Harry wasn’t sure how to deal with the fact Louis had done something so kind for him, something a boyfriend or a girlfriend might do for their other half, and he felt ridiculously touched at the thoughtful gesture. “You… you didn't have to. How much was it, I’ll give you-”

“No, you bloody won’t,” Louis bit back, putting the tube in Harry’s hand. “A little pressie from me. I know you said your belly was itchy the other day because of the skin stretching and stuff, so I just thought I’d get something that could help.” He looked up to see tears in Harry’s eyes, and hurried over. “Oh, don’t cry, Haz. Come on, it’s only stretchmark cream…”

“Just… I don’t have anyone to do these things for me, so … thank you, Lou,” Harry said, pressing a quick kiss to Louis’ cheek, his cheeks flaring up as his lips made contact with Louis’ stubble laden skin. “Um, here’s your tea, I’m gonna hop in the shower and try the cream.” With a quick and shy smile, he hurried off as quick as he could to the bathroom, pulling off his clothes before he stepped under the warm spray.

He couldn’t stop thinking about what Louis had done for him, how kind and generous the man was, not to mention how gorgeous he was too. He started cleaning himself, his skin cooling thanks to the warm water, and slowly, Harry’s hand trailed to his cock. He closed his eyes as his fingers wrapped around his length, a slight guilt flooding his veins as he pictured Louis, how Louis had cuddled him in bed, how easily their bodies had fit together as Louis comforted him. The fact Harry now knew Louis had been with men only made Harry’s mind run away with him even more, and before he knew it, his hand was flying over his cock, Harry barely able to see what he was doing thanks to his baby bump.

“Oh fuck- Louis-” he whimpered out as he came hard, coloured lights flashing behind his eyes as his orgasm took over his body, releasing with Louis’ name on his lips. He stroked himself until it bordered on being too much, and he watched as his come trickled down the drain, Harry slowly coming back to reality. Louis was out of bounds, he knew that, he was married and adopting Harry’s baby girl when she was born. But still, Harry was struggling to get the man out of his head, and now the floodgates were open, Harry wasn’t sure they were ever going to be shut again.

*****

A few days later, on a bright and sunny Saturday morning, Harry found himself alone downstairs. Jess was out for the day, meeting with a friend to get their nails done, and Harry was determined to make the most of the day of rest. For once, he had no reading for college to do, and his next shift at work wasn’t until Tuesday afternoon. He felt relaxed, had spent a good ten minutes rubbing the wonderful cream that Louis had bought him the other day into his belly. He’d googled it and was shocked by how much it cost, but he knew Louis was be offended if he so much as tried to offer a penny towards it.

Instead, he’d cooked Louis and Jess as many meals as he could manage, constantly offered to make tea, and had done his fair share of housework, determined to pay Louis back in whatever way he’d allowed for his kindness. Harry had also thought of another few ways he could show Louis how grateful he was, but he knew they definitely wouldn’t be welcomed by either Louis or Jess. More’s the pity.

Louis was still laying in bed, music low on his sound system, enjoying a bit of a lie in. Jess had pretty much ignored him this morning, and he’d given up trying to work out what he’d done wrong this time. It was getting clear his wife couldn’t stand the sight of him at the moment, and the more he tried to be nice to her, the more she pushed him away. He was getting frustrated with the situation, and found himself spending much more time with Harry, just watching TV or going for walks, Harry preferring to get out in the fresh air whenever he could.

Louis couldn’t deny he was starting to fall for the pregnant young man carrying his adopted daughter. Every morning, Harry never failed to put a smile on Louis’ face, appearing in the kitchen with a cup of tea, made exactly how Louis liked it, and he always made an effort at the end of every day to ask how work had been, genuinely interested in whatever article Louis had been working on that day. Louis found himself confiding more and more in Harry, about the people he disliked at work, how things were tough at the moment with Jess, and the cuddles they were having late at night on the sofa weren’t helping Louis whatsoever.

Still, he knew Harry loved cuddles, and so did he, so there was no harm in it. At all. The fact Louis may have been sneakily stroking Harry’s belly under the blanket was neither here nor there either, both men ignoring it, staring steadfastly at the television as Jess sat a couple of chairs over, engrossed in whatever show they were watching. Louis was currently texting one of his sisters, promising to pop home soon when a scream startled him.

“Louis! Jess!” Harry sounded panicked and that made Louis panic. Not caring that he was in just his underwear, he sprinted down the stairs as quickly as he could, heading to the kitchen, where he thought he might find Harry. The man was stood in the middle of the kitchen, a plastic bottle of water spilling on the floor at his feet as he looked shocked, both hands clamped down hard on his belly.

“Oh my god, are you okay? What happened? Is it the baby? Do I-”

“Louis, get your arse here now!” Harry all but shouted, and Louis hurried forwards. Harry grabbed his wrist with a hand and Louis watched as he yanked up the fabric of his tank top, baring his belly and pressing Louis’ palm firmly against the taut skin. There was silence as Louis wondered what on earth Harry was doing when he felt it. His eyes flew open and met Harry’s, his grin matching the one now stretched Harry’s face.

“Holy shit- was that-” Harry nodded excitedly, and the pair giggled as the baby did it again, Louis in complete and utter awe. “Oh my god, she kicked Harry-”

“That’s the first time I’ve really felt it. I’ve felt a few flutters before, I wasn’t sure but that- that was definitely a kick, Lou. That’s my-your daughter in there, and she’s letting us know she’s there.” Harry looked up at Louis, blushing slightly at his slip, and they smiled softly at each other, their eyes meeting as they shared the precious moment together. The baby continued to move about softly until she stilled, Louis not wanting to remove his hands from Harry’s soft skin.

Without thinking, he dropped to his knees, hands still either side of Harry’s belly. He felt Harry’s hands come to rest on his shoulders, and he slowly leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to where he’d felt his baby girl move inside Harry’s tummy.

“Hey baby, it’s Daddy. Um, I just felt you for the first time, and I just wanted to say hi… and, yeah.” He got to his feet and removed his hands, suddenly feeling a bit awkward. “Sorry, I just-”

“Don’t. Don’t say sorry, it’s fine. I talk to her a lot, when I’m going to bed or whatever. I don’t mind if you do, she’s your daughter, Lou.”

“Thank you. For that, and for sharing that with me. I really thought something was wrong, the way you screamed out. God, my heart-” he laughed and laid a hand on his chest, very suddenly aware he was naked except for his boxers. “Hence the no clothes situation…”

He looked up, suddenly noticing Harry’s eyes raking up and down his body, resting on his slightly pudgy tummy. Harry blushed as he looked away, knowing full well he’d been caught ogling and Louis tried to ignore it, not wanting to embarrass Harry any further. He reached forwards, taking the hem of Harry’s top in his hands and tugged it down, covering him back up again.

“Um, do you want to go for a walk or something? Looks like a nice morning, and I don’t really want to be stuck in all day.” Harry nodded and Louis walked out of the room, going upstairs to get dressed. Before he did, he sat on the edge of his mattress, staring down at his left hand, playing with his wedding ring. Things with Jess were just getting tougher, and sharing moments like this with Harry was only making it harder. He found himself wanting to spend more time with Harry than with his wife, which felt wrong in some ways, yet so right in others.

He got into some shorts and a tank top, sliding his feet into some Vans, not bothering with socks. When he got downstairs, Harry was already waiting in the hallway, sunglasses on his face, and a headscarf around his curls. He smiled and walked out of the front door, Louis grabbing his keys before he walked out. They started off down the road, and Louis stuffed his hands down into his pockets to stop himself reaching for Harry’s hand.

“Hey, I found a pregnancy yoga group online,” Harry began, turning to face Louis occasionally as he spoke. “The first session is next week at the community centre, at 7. Um, I was wondering, if you’re not busy, and if you don’t mind-”

“Course I’ll give you a ride,” Louis cut in, knowing exactly what Harry was struggling to ask for. “My mate lives near there, I can pop in and see him while you do your class then bring you home after. Have you always liked yoga and stuff?”

“Um, yeah. I did it a lot when I was younger, with my sister. I’ve always had a bad back, and it kind of helps relieve the pain a bit. I think it might help with the pregnancy as well, I’ve read it’s very calming.”

“Worth a try. Personally it’s not my cup of tea, but if it works for you, then go for it. But if I forget, just come and grab me for the lift, yeah?”

“Thanks, Lou. Steve always took the piss when I tried to do yoga, said it was girly so I stopped, it was just-”

“He said what?” Louis said, stopping Harry with a gentle hand on his wrist, feeling anger boil inside him at what he’d heard Harry just say. “Your boyfriend made you feel bad because you liked to do yoga? Are you kidding me?”

“Ex-boyfriend, Lou. He’s gone, remember? He- he didn't get it, I suppose, me liking yoga. There was a lot about me he didn't like, actually, looking back.” He suddenly stopped talking, as if he realised what he was confessing and looked back to the ground, beginning to walk again.

“Were things… bad between you?” Louis asked, hoping Harry would finally start opening up. They’d known each other for quite a long time now, but Louis still felt like there was a big portion of Harry’s life he was keeping from them, and everytime it came up, Harry quickly diverted away from the topic, as if he couldn’t bring himself to discuss it.

“I don’t really wanna talk about it, Lou. Sorry,” Harry mumbled, still walking alongside Louis. “So, tell me,” he began, changing the subject as he often did. “How is that article going?”

Louis sighed and agreed to Harry’s subject change, talking more about the article he’d written a few weeks ago that his editor wasn’t too pleased with. Louis was proud of it, however, getting Jess and Harry to read it over, both approving it until finally, his editor had agreed to publish it. Harry had been enthusiastic about it, and Louis had felt warm from his support. They walked until Harry complained about his hips feeling sore and they turned around, heading home, Louis smiling fondly when just an hour later, Harry was curled up and asleep on the sofa.

He picked up the blanket that Harry loved to curl up in and draped it over him, gently pushing his curls back from his forehead, taking the opportunity to lean in and kiss his forehead gently, enjoying how his lips felt on Harry’s soft skin. It felt like an intimate moment somehow, one he wanted to store away and remember, wishing, if only for a second, that things could be so very different.

*****

Later that night, a very tired Harry was laid on his back, kept awake by his baby girl doing what felt like dance moves inside his tummy. His hands were pressed down, feeling every bump and kick, and he loved it, loved feeling her so alive and well inside him. He was whispering words of love to her, wanting her to know how much he cared, that he really didn't want to give her up, but that he had no choice.

Steve had been on his mind too, more so than any other time lately. Louis had been probing more and more, asking questions that Harry desperately wanted to answer, but he wasn’t sure how to. Part of him wanted to open up and tell Louis, to finally let out the demons that had been trapped inside for so long, but he had a warped sense of loyalty still towards the father of his baby. Still, the desire to talk was burning louder now than ever, and Harry made a split decision before he could change his mind.

He yanked on some shorts, not bothering with a top as he crept out of his room, pulling his door closed behind him. He raised his hand to knock on Louis’ bedroom door, hesitating for a moment. He wasn’t sure Louis would appreciate being woken up, and turned around, about to head back to his bedroom again. Just as he did, the baby suddenly delivered a harsh kick to Harry’s abdomen, making him gasp and look down. He felt like she was trying to tell him something and he smiled, rubbing gently where he had felt her kick.

“Okay, okay, I’ll do it, little love,” he whispered, taking in a deep breath as he knocked gently. There was no sound behind the door, and Harry knew there was no way he was barging in that room. He was about to knock again when the door clicked open a crack, a tired looking Louis peering out, features full of concern when he saw Harry stood there. “Um, sorry to wake you-”

“No, don’t say sorry, it’s fine. Is something wrong? The baby?”

“No, Lou, me and the baby are fine. Do you- do you mind if we talk?” Harry felt nervous at asking, worried that Louis would deny him, and to be honest, if he did, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to get over that. Of course, Louis didn't say no, nodding his head before he slipped out of the room, closing the door as quietly as he could behind him. He was wearing a baggy pair of pyjama trousers, and together, they crept down the stairs.

Louis handed Harry a blanket that he wrapped around himself before he settled on the sofa, grabbing a hoodie from the arm of another chair he’d taken off earlier on. He curled his legs up underneath him, Harry’s eyes watching the shift of his thigh muscles as he did so, heart racing in his chest as he thought about what he was about to do.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” The room was dimly lit, only a small corner lamp lighting everything up, and it felt cosy somehow, like he and Louis were the only two people in the world in that moment. He ignored the fact he and Louis were entirely alone, and focused only on the beautiful man in front of him. He clasped the blanket over his lap tightly in his hands, the soft fabric clinging to his belly.

“I wanted to, to tell you. About, um, me and Steve. I know you’ve been asking and I’ve been holding back, which isn’t fair-”

“Hey, you don’t owe me anything, Haz. If you don’t want to talk about it, it’s okay. I promise.”

“I want to. I have to. I think if I don’t get it out soon, it’ll drive me mad.” Louis nodded, staying quiet. He must have sensed Harry was struggling because he reached across the divide, shuffling closer and taking Harry’s hand in his own. For a moment, Harry noticed that Louis wasn’t wearing his wedding ring, a band of pale skin where the metal band usually laid, but he ignored it, steeling himself for what he was going to do.

“Me and Steve… I thought he was the one. Honestly, I did. Before I got pregnant, I was thinking about asking him to marry me. In my head, we were a forever thing.” Louis remained quiet, his thumb gently stroking the back of Harry’s hand, a reassuring touch Harry so badly needed. “He’d always been honest about the fact he didn't want children. Stupidly, I thought he might change his mind one day.”

“Not stupid,” Louis whispered. “It’s not stupid to want a family of your own.”

Harry could feel a lump rising in his throat and swallowed it back, carrying on. “I didn't get pregnant on purpose. We always used condoms, and I was on birth control.  Still don’t know how it happened, but it did. It felt like, I don’t know, a sign, maybe?”

“A sign for what?”

“That we were meant to have kids, meant to be a family? I got excited, I started planning for the future. I really, honestly thought that when I told him, he’d be happy.”

“But he wasn’t.”

“No, he wasn’t,” Harry chuckled darkly, resentment filling his body. “I’m sure he blamed me, that he thought I got pregnant on purpose.”

“So, what happened?” Louis squeezed tighter then, supporting Harry every step of the way.

“The morning after I told him, I left him in bed while I went to college. When I came home, he was gone. He’d taken all his things and disappeared. He left me a shitty note, telling me he never wanted kids, and that I was on my own if I kept the baby.”

“What a dick,” Louis muttered, unable to hold back anymore. “Seriously, Harry, that’s a shitty thing to do. If you’re man enough to get someone pregnant, be man enough to stick by their side. You didn’t get pregnant on your own, love. I hate men that run out like that.”

“I’ve not heard from him since. He’s changed his number, erased me out of his life like I never mattered-” Harry choked up then, tears already threatening to fall. “Louis… I… I feel so alone-” he started crying then, his hands quickly coming up to cover his face. He cried for a moment before he pulled back, not really caring he was a mess in front of Louis, he’d seen it all before. “I knew I couldn’t give my baby the life they deserved, not on my own. That’s when I made the decision about adoption. When I met you and Jess, I knew you were the right people.”

“Harry… you’re not alone. You won’t be alone anymore, I promise. You have Jess, and you have me… you’ll always have me.” Louis stopped talking for a second, the gap between himself and Harry getting ever smaller. Harry subconsciously licked his lips, the air between the pair heavy with tension, and something Harry couldn’t identify. “Are you still in love with him?”

“Steve? No. Not after what he did. I mean, I’ll always love him as the father of my baby, but there’s nothing left there anymore.”

“I know that feeling…” Louis whispered, his eyes coming up to meet Harry’s again, and Harry pondered on what Louis meant by that. “I hate that he made you so sad, and that he made you feel alone. I wish I could stop you ever feeling that way again…” Once again, the air changed between them, and Harry held his breath, sure this might be the turning moment for everything.

Just as he was readying himself, Louis pulled back and coughed slightly, getting to his feet. “Thank you for telling me, Harry, and trusting me. I’ll keep it to myself, I promise.” He held out his hands and helped Harry to his feet, admiring his bump and resting his hands on it quickly. “So beautiful. Let’s get to bed, okay?” Harry nodded and paused for a moment, wondering if he would be brave enough to ask for something else he needed.

“Um, can I have a hug, Lou?” Louis smiled and nodded, their bodies coming together. Harry was suddenly very aware he had nothing on his top half, Louis’ hands burning into his back as they rested there, Louis’ head against Harry’s bare chest. After a moment, Louis pulled back. “Thank you… for everything.”

Louis took Harry’s hand and led them upstairs, pausing outside Harry’s closed bedroom door. There was silence for a moment, their hands linked between them still. “You know you can talk to me whenever, Haz. I’m always here for you. Sleep well, love. Goodnight.” Louis reached up and rested a hand on Harry’s shoulder, his lips grazing Harry’s cheek.

Harry just smiled, unable to speak as his body began responding to Louis’ proximity, silently willing Louis not to step any closer in case he felt exactly how he was affecting Harry. With a small smile, Louis turned away and went back inside his bedroom, Harry hurrying back into his own room. He sighed as he pushed his shorts down his thighs, flopping back onto his bed, curling on his side. The size of his belly meant laying on his back was getting hard, and he often felt breathless, so his side was the best way to sleep.

With a sigh, he shut his eyes, trying to sleep. Instead of darkness, all he could picture was Louis. Louis’ face. Louis’ eyes. Louis’ hands on his body, on his belly, on his dick. Louis all over him. Louis. Louis. Louis. Louis was everything, and right now, Harry wanted nothing more than to be Louis’, and for Louis to be his.

*****

Harry stirred from his sleep, stretching his muscles out when he felt a now familiar kick low in his belly. He grinned and his hand flew down to touch the taut skin where his baby girl was merrily letting him know he was awake, and his mind drifted off to the memory of he and Louis sharing that special moment last night, feeling the baby kick together. Harry felt somewhat guilty that Jess had missed out on it, but at the same time, it wasn’t as if he had planned it, and there was no way either of them could have known it was going to happen last night.

He headed to the bathroom and used the facilities before he went back to his room and pulled on some joggers, resting the waistband under his bump and pulling a t-shirt down to cover his torso. He noticed Louis’ bedroom door was open and the room was empty so he went downstairs, stopping in the hallway when he heard familiar voices in the kitchen.

Jess’ shoes were kicked off by the front door next to the holdall Harry knew she had taken with her, and he couldn’t help listening it when he heard Jess say his name. He hoped he wasn’t going to be the source of yet another argument between the pair, and he leant against the doorframe, their words carrying easily through the quiet house.

“...it’s not like we planned it, for goodness sakes. The baby didn't know you weren’t here, so I’m sorry you missed out, but-”

“No, Louis, it’s not just this! It’s like this pregnancy is all about you two sometimes, and I’m just stuck on the outside looking in.”

“You’re being ridiculous, Jess. Harry is carrying our baby - yours and mine. So just… stop it, yeah? He’s finding it tough, and I just want to take care of him.”

“Yeah, and don’t think I haven’t noticed that.” Harry shuddered at the venom in her voice, and bit his lip, feeling a bit upset. “I just seem to miss all the big moments, Louis. Maybe you should just raise the baby with him instead.” There was no reply from Louis, and then Harry heard a scoff from Jess and the sound of a chair scraping across the kitchen floor, and before Harry could even turn around and head back upstairs, Jess was storming past him and up the stairs herself.

“Jess, you need to- oh shit. Harry… how much did you hear?” Louis looked guilty and stopped in front of Harry, a look of regret on his face.

“Enough,” Harry whispered, tears burning at the back of his eyes. He turned and ran upstairs as quickly as he could, starting to throw things into his bag, things he knew he wouldn’t be able to leave behind. His eyes flew around as he checked he had everything of importance and pulled on a hoodie, zipping it up over his bump as he thundered down the stairs, grabbing his keys from the little dish near the front door.

Louis must have heard the sound of Harry in the hall as he appeared from the sitting room then, eyes wide when he took in the sight of Harry with his bag by his feet.

“Harry? What… are you leaving? What’s going on?” He panicked and stepped over to Harry, raking a hand through his hair, eyes wild as he tried to work out what was happening.

“I heard what you and Jess were arguing about… and I know it’s not the first time, Lou. I can’t break your marriage up, I can’t.” He bent down and picked up his heavy bag, wincing as the weight pulled on his muscles for a moment until he got it comfortable. He took Louis’ hand and pressed the key into it, closing his fingers around it. “I’m sorry, Louis.”

Harry pulled open the front door and stepped outside into the cool morning air, surprised when it hit his cheeks, blowing his hair around his face. He’d barely made it to the end of the garden path when there were footsteps running up behind him, and a small hand grabbing his wrist tightly.

“I’m not letting you run away, not now. None of this is your fault, and I won’t let you think that it is.”

“Louis, I won’t be the reason your marriage falls apart-”

“Stop right there. You aren’t the reason my marriage is in trouble, I promise. Things haven’t…” he stopped and sighed for a moment, releasing Harry’s wrist. “Things haven’t been right for a while. I promise you, it’s not you. Please, Harry, please don’t go.”

“I don’t know, Lou. I just-”

“I need you, Haz. I can’t lose you, not now. Please.” Harry wobbled when he saw tears glistening in Louis’ eyes and he reached out, taking his hand for a moment. Harry paused, watching Louis’ adam's apple bob as he swallowed heavily before he slid his hand out of Harry’s, turning and heading back into the house. His shoulders were hunched and his head was hung to the floor. Harry stayed outside for a moment, debating what to do until he made a decision.

He couldn’t leave Louis. Not now, not when he’d all but begged him to stay. Slowly, he turned around, ignoring the kicking in his belly as he went back up the path and into the house, closing the front door behind him. He gently placed his keys back into the bowl and left his bag at the bottom of the stairs, listening out for any sign of Louis. He could hear the TV on in the sitting room, and the shower was running upstairs, so he took a guess that Louis was still downstairs.

Louis looked up as Harry walked in and stared at him for a moment before a small smile crossed his lips. There were no words needed. Harry knew the reason he was back, and somehow, he had a feeling Louis knew it too. He shivered with the thought that maybe his feelings might be more reciprocated than he had ever thought but pushed them aside. Something with Louis was never going to happen, he was here to give him and Jess a baby, and that was all.

Louis patted the expanse of sofa next to him as he turned his eyes back to the television and Harry slowly walked over. He sat down next to Louis, and gasped as the baby did a particularly large kick to the side of his belly pressed against Louis’ thigh. Louis smiled, feeling it, and Harry nodded when Louis’ hand snuck across, resting gently on his tummy. They just stayed there, watching telly, bonded by the feel of the baby wriggling around inside Harry. Clearly there was still a lot that they needed to work out, and Louis and Jess needed to talk, too. But Harry felt like despite this, somehow, things were going to be okay.

*****

“Wow, your bump is amazing! Can I ask how far along you are?” the salesman said to Harry, who was blushing and stuttering under the attention. Louis knew that Harry wasn’t used to parading his bump around in public that much, and he’d been very aware of lots of eyes on his pregnant friend as he had followed Louis and Jess around town that morning. Louis had a few chores to do, and had persuaded Harry to come out with the pair of them, knowing he needed to buy some more paternity clothes.

Jess had disappeared to look for a few things for herself in the clothes store, and Louis had wandered around as Harry had browsed the selection of pregnancy clothing. Louis had noticed a few things catch his eyes, Harry stroking the soft fabrics between his fingers, smiling at a few of the cheesy looking slogan tops that made Louis grin.

Harry had a few things hooked over his arm, ready to take them into the changing room, but Louis could sense his hesitancy, especially since this overeager salesman didn't seem to want to leave Harry alone. Louis hovered, not wanting Harry to feel like he couldn’t handle the situation on his own but when he saw the man reach out to touch Harry’s bump and the look of panic on Harry’s face, he had to step in.

Quickly, he stepped over and stood next to Harry, wrapping an arm protectively around his waist, the salesman looking a little shocked at the move. Harry smiled over to him, and Louis could see the gratitude filling his eyes.

“You okay, love? Need any help?” Harry just shook his head, his curls brushing Louis’ face thanks to how close they were standing. “Oh sorry, was I interrupting?”

“Oh, um, no, I was just checking to see if you needed any help,” the salesman said, blushing by now. Louis just grinned back.

“I think we’re all good, but thank you. Let’s get you to the fitting room,” Louis said, guiding Harry in the opposite direction with a hand placed gently at the base of his spine. He couldn’t help but love how perfectly his hand felt nestled there, and pushed back the urge to slide his hand up under the hem of Harry’s shirt, to touch his soft skin. “Right, in you go. Let me see you in them though, please?”

“Okay,” Harry said, shuffling in to the changing room and pulling the curtain across, leaving Louis sat outside on one of the chairs. His phone buzzed, just Jess texting him to say she was on the lower floor wandering around the make-up counter, and he replied saying he was with Harry still looking at clothes. The curtain slid open and a nervous Harry emerged in a pair of tight jeans, socks on his feet and a baggy pink blouse draped over his top half.

Before Louis could even begin to say anything, Harry started mumbling nervously, tugging at the fabric around his body.

“Um, I’m not sure about the top, it’s really big, and makes me feel huge, and the jeans are quite tight on my thighs, I must have put on weight-”

“Harry, love. You look lovely. The blouse looks great, might be nice for days when you don’t want anything clinging to your tummy perhaps. And I love the jeans, you look great, and your thighs are not huge, you’re pregnant.” He tried not to react as Harry pulled up the shirt, showing Louis the large elastic panel over his bump sewn into the top of the jeans. He yanked on the material for a moment until he was comfortable, letting the shirt down again. He looked up and smiled at Louis before he disappeared again.

Louis sat down, ignoring the thrum of something in veins from seeing Harry like this, so vulnerable and yet so open to Louis at the same time. He could hear Harry pulling clothes off, and his mind ran away with him at the thought of what Harry would look like in far less clothes. Louis loved when Harry was confident enough to walk around topless in the comfort of their home, but the thought of Harry naked… that was something else all together.

The curtain pulled back again and Harry appeared in a smarter black and white shirt with a heart pattern all over it. There were deep blue jeans on his lower half this time, and Louis felt like his heart might give out. Harry’s curls were fluffy, and his cheeks were slightly red from the exertion of getting the clothes on and off in a small, confined space. The lack of air conditioning wasn’t helping either.

Louis stood up and went to stand beside Harry, who was looking at his figure in the mirror, running his hands over his bump.

“Beautiful,” Louis whispered, reaching across and resting one hand on the side of Harry’s bump, knowing Harry had no problem with him being tactile with his belly. “You’re stunning.”

Harry slowly turned around until he and Louis were face to face, and Louis’ breath hitched. He felt his tongue slip out and wet his lips as he and Harry’s eyes locked, staring at each other. There was no one else around, it felt like they were the only two people in the whole world in that moment. Louis’ hands itched to hold Harry’s, and he felt himself gravitate towards Harry as Harry leaned in to him.

Louis was stopped by the loud noise of his phone ringing, making Harry stumble backwards. Louis reached out and grabbed at Harry’s hips, steadying him so he wouldn’t fall and hurt himself or the baby. Harry mumbled a few words of thanks before he disappeared behind the curtain again. A few minutes later, he came out in the clothes they’d set out in earlier, the others held over his arm. Louis gently took them and followed Harry out, blinking quickly when he spotted Jess.

Harry took the clothes back again and headed over to the till to pay, Jess hovering near Louis for a moment.

“Helping him get dressed now, are we?”

“Give it a rest. He wanted my opinion.” Louis didn't even bother to look at Jess. They’d decided to put on a front to Harry to act like everything was okay between them, not wanting the pregnant man to feel any worse than he did about the deterioration of their marriage. Harry thanked the lady who served him and carried the plastic bag by his side as he came back to stand with Louis and Jess. “Right, everyone ready for some lunch?” Harry nodded, his belly gurgling loudly which made all three of them laugh.

Louis stayed back a bit as Harry lifted a couple of his new clothes out of the bag enough to show Jess, who managed to look interested in what Harry was saying to her. They found a small cafe to eat lunch in, Harry hungrily devouring his bowl of soup and bread much to Louis’ amusement. Jess just picked at a salad, rolling her eyes at the meaty burger Louis chose to eat, laughing as Harry grabbed at the pickles he’d left on the side of his plate, moaning as he pushed them between his lips.

They headed home shortly afterwards, Harry’s back starting to ache thanks to the extra weight of his bump, and his ankles were starting to feel sore, too. Jess dropped Louis and Harry off at home, telling the pair she was going to see her Mum for a little while. Louis reluctantly agreed, and sat quietly at the kitchen table while Harry retired to his room to have a nap. Louis knew he had a busy day at college the next day, so was pleased Harry was choosing to nap and rest his weary body.

Louis made them both some sandwiches and snacks while Harry slept, setting things out in front of the television, keeping the volume low until he heard the floorboards upstairs creaking, telling him Harry was up and awake at last. Louis had picked out a few DVDs he wanted to watch, and when Harry appeared in the doorway with a fond smile on his face, Louis grinned back, a small “Ta da!” on his lips.

“Oh, Lou, you didn't have to do all this,” Harry said, padding into the room in a small pair of shorts and a t-shirt Louis suspected might well be his own. He sat down heavily on the sofa, one hand under his bump supporting the weight, and he wriggled until he was against the backrest. Louis passed him his plate, Harry letting him know which other snacks he wanted, and together, they chose to watch one of Louis’ favourite comedy movies.

“Thanks for this, Louis. It looks lovely, but you didn't have to. I don’t expect you to run around after me.” Harry popped a small cocktail sausage into his mouth and chewed as Louis crouched down in front of the DVD player, popping the disk into the machine.

“I hardly think making you a sandwich and sticking some snacks onto a plate is running around after you, love. And honestly, you’re welcome. If you need anything, let me know. You’ve got a long day tomorrow so take advantage of me being here and rest.” Harry smiled and nodded, and Louis felt ridiculously fond as he watched Harry balance his small plate on his bump, looking full of glee when it actually steadied and stayed there.

They laughed their way through the movie, Harry actually crying with laughter at one point which just made Louis laugh even harder. They had to pause it at one point, Harry stating that if he didn't get to the loo, he was going to have an embarrassing accident, which made Louis laugh so hard some of his beer spurted out of his nose. Harry had rushed off at that, legs almost crossed to stop himself from doing anything embarrassing.

Harry returned and sat closer to Louis, their torsos pressed together as they continued to laugh. Louis loved that spending time with Harry was so easy, and he couldn’t stop visions of the two of them doing this for years to come filling his mind, making him feel more than content.

“Oh my god, Lou, look at the state of him!” Harry practically yelled, pointing at the TV as he rocked backwards, a full belly laugh bursting out of him which made Louis giggle even more. He turned to look at the boy next him, merrily wiping tears from under his eyes, and he felt time stop again as their eyes locked. Harry looked stunning - his hair was a complete mess, his eyes were red-rimmed, and tear tracks ran down his cheeks from laughing so hard, but Louis thought he’d never looked more beautiful.

He was about to say something when Harry bit his lip, and grabbed his hand, a bolt of electricity running through Louis as their skin touched. Before Louis knew what was happening, Harry was surging forwards and pressing their lips together. Louis felt stunned, so stunned he couldn’t react - Harry’s lips were soft and perfect against his own, Harry’s fuller ones encompassing Louis’ thinner lips, and he couldn’t deny that this was what he had wanted for such a long time. Finally, and without really thinking, he allowed his eyes to shut and brought his hand up, resting on Harry’s cheek for a moment as he began to kiss Harry back, their lips moving together, Harry’s belly now pressing into Louis’ own stomach as they got closer.

It was that nudge that dragged Louis back to reality. His eyes flew open and he pulled back, letting his hand drop back into his lap. He’d loved the kiss, there was no doubt about that. He wanted nothing more than to grab Harry and kiss him again, deeper this time, but he couldn’t. He was married, and this wasn’t fair to Jess.

“Harry, I-”

“Oh god, I’m so sorry, Louis. I just- I misread the situation, oh god, I’ve ruined everything.” Harry’s hands came up to cover his eyes and Louis could see him shaking, and he wished there was something more he could do to comfort him.

“Harry… love, I’m not angry at you, and you haven’t ruined anything, I promise. And, um, you didn't misread anything.” He saw Harry peep up at him at that, and flushed from finally admitting to his feelings. “But we can’t do this now, it isn’t fair to Jess. It isn’t that I didn't like it, I swear. I did, I... I loved it, Harry, and that’s the problem. I just can’t do this to Jess. I have to talk to her. I need to tell her.”

*****

Harry nodded at Louis’ words. He felt sick, like he’d made the biggest mistake of his life, despite Louis’ reassurance. What hurt the most was that Louis wasn’t attempting to comfort him physically, as if that would lead to something else unwanted. Harry couldn’t believe he had read the situation so wrong, and felt nauseous at the fact he might actually lose Louis for good over this.

“I… I need to go, I’m going to bed,” he mumbled, carefully getting to his feet, watching Louis hover out of the corner of his eye, ready to support Harry if he needed to. Harry placed his now empty plate on the table and ignored the end of the movie still playing on the television. Without meeting Louis’ eye, he left the room and went upstairs as quickly as he could, muscles screaming in protest after a long day on his feet.

He got into his bedroom and closed the door behind him, biting back the sob threatening to break free now he was alone. He slumped down onto his bed, and the scan photo propped up against his bedside lamp caught his eye. He picked it up and looked down at the photo, stroking the little head with the tip of his finger.

“I’m so sorry I keep screwing this up, baby girl,” he whispered, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. “I’m really scared there’s no coming back from this… I’ve ruined your one chance at finding a family. I’m so, so sorry.” He put the photo down and cried, aware that Louis could probably hear his sobs. He curled up into a ball on the bed, wondering if he should pack his bags now or wait until the morning. There’s no way Louis would want him to remain in the house now, no matter what lies he’d said about enjoying the kiss, and it was only when Harry’s pillow was drenched with his own tears that he allowed himself to finally fall asleep, hand wrapped around his belly, heart shattered into a million pieces.


	5. 29 to 33 weeks

Louis’ head was banging when he left his bedroom the next morning. He’d sunk a few beers alone when Harry had run away last night after their kiss, and Louis knew he wasn’t going to be getting any sleep. Instead, he sat and watched reruns of his favourite TV shows late into the night, not surprised when Jess didn't return until gone midnight. She barely acknowledged him as she came into the house, and it was only then that Louis retired to bed, back turned to Jess as they fell asleep, as seemed the norm these days.

He woke up with his wife still asleep behind him, and he felt sick at the thought of the conversation he had to have with her in a short while, although in his mind, he knew it was very necessary. He frowned when he saw Harry’s bedroom was wide open, and couldn’t resist peeking in, relieved to see evidence Harry hadn’t run away overnight. His pyjamas were on his bed, and the scan photo was still propped up against his bedside lamp.

Louis went downstairs and made himself a black coffee. It wasn’t something he especially liked to drink but he felt he needed it that morning just to wake him up. There was no sign of Harry anywhere, and Louis pulled his phone out of his pocket, seeing he had a message from Harry telling him he’d walked to college, and not to worry. Louis was of course worried that a twenty-nine week pregnant man was walking a few miles alone but at the same time, he appreciated Harry probably needed space after the developments of the night before.

Louis sipped on the hot and bitter liquid as he sat at the table alone, mind racing with the thoughts of what had happened last night. There was no denying that the relationship between himself and Harry had changed lately. It was only little things, but when Louis put them together, it suddenly became obvious that both he and Harry had feelings for each other, no matter how much they tried to deny them. Harry had been much more confident around Louis and they’d been very tactile, from their late night cuddles to Harry cuddling up to Louis while they watched TV, the long walks they took together, the things that Harry had confided to him about, not sharing anything personal about himself with Jess at all.

Louis sighed as he heard movement upstairs, meaning Jess was up. It was a Saturday, and Louis knew neither of them had any plans so were both due to be at home, at least for the first part of the morning. He poured her coffee and made it just as she liked it, setting on the table near his as he waited for her to come downstairs. His heart was racing now, and he could see his hands trembling, so he clutched his mug harder, not wanting her to realise anything was wrong, at least, not yet.

“Morning.” Louis was startled from his thoughts as she walked into the room in her pyjamas, a pair of shorts and a vest top, and he watched the curve of her legs as she sat on the chair, one foot on the seat part of the chair as she reached forwards to pick up the drink Louis had poured her. “Sleep well?”

“Not really,” Louis replied with a shrug. He drained the last of his drink and left the mug on the table in front of him, fiddling with the ceramic handle with his fingers for something to do. “You?”

“Yeah, okay. Have a good night with Harry? Where is he?”

“Oh, he text me and said he’s at college all day, so he’ll be back later. Actually-”

“Here it comes,” she said with a roll of her eyes, Louis swallowing as he realised she had no idea what was coming.

“Jess, this is serious. I really need to talk to you about something.”

“Now?” she asked, and he nodded. As much as he wanted to put it off and run away from the truth, he knew for himself, and for Harry, that this had to be done. It would hurt but for everyone’s sakes, it needed to be out in the open. Jess stood up and headed through to the sitting room, curling up in the armchair, giving Louis nowhere else to sit but on the sofa at one end, keeping them apart. “Well, come on then. Tell me whatever it is you have to say.”

Louis nodded and licked his lips quickly, holding her gaze, knowing he couldn’t do anything but.

“Harry kissed me last night. No, that’s not fair. We kissed each other. I didn't reject it, I just…. Harry and I kissed, Jess.”

There was silence for a moment and Louis couldn’t stop his gaze falling to the floor, unable to look at the effect his words were having on her. He could hear the blood rushing through his own ears, and he couldn’t stop himself from speaking now, everything coming out in a jumbled rush.

“We didn't, we didn't plan it- it just happened, I don’t. Oh god, I’m sorry. Harry just-”

“Shut up. Just fucking shut up, Louis. Is this some sick fucking kind of joke? My husband fucking kissing the man carrying our baby?”

“No, it’s not, I’m-”

“Do not fucking tell me you’re sorry again, Louis, I swear to God. Where? Where did you kiss him?”

“Um, here. We were watching a movie and it just… it just happened. Jess, I promise you-”

“Are you going to tell me it was a mistake and it meant nothing, Louis?! Is that the next load of bullshit you’re going to tell me?” Louis looked up as Jess continued to stare at her, and he could see the change in her eyes, the flicker of recognition as she groaned, grabbing at her hair with her hands. “Oh my god… you can’t tell me that, can you? Because it wasn’t a mistake…”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered back, wringing his hands in his lap. He could feel the anger emanating off her, and he stood up, moving to crouch in front of her. “Jess…”

“I knew it. How the fucking hell could you do this? You’ve betrayed me, and betrayed our marriage. How are we - how are we meant to come back from this? Do you even want to?”

“I don’t know.” Louis was determined to be honest, and he shoved his hands between his legs in an attempt to keep them still.

“What are we supposed to do, Louis? We’re having a fucking baby… did you think about that? We’ve signed the papers, is…. Have you just been staying with me because of the baby? Because you want Harry’s baby?”

“No!” Louis was quick to shout that down, knowing that most definitely wasn’t the case, no matter what Jess might have thought. “Jess, just… no. No way. That’s not how it is, at all.”

Jess looked back at him and Louis couldn’t do anything but sit and listen, almost seeing the fight leave her with each of her words. Her body deflated, her shoulders hunching and falling. “Somehow, I knew there was something between you… something I used to see between you and me. The way you look at him, Louis… it’s how you used to look at me. When you were falling for me. We should have talked about this sooner, before things ever got this far.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Louis admitted. “I could say I’m sorry again but… I’m not, in a way. I’m sorry that this happened, because we’re married, and I meant my vows when I said them. But I can’t keep pretending things are okay with us because they’re clearly not. You cannot tell me you’ve been happy in this marriage lately, Jess. We just feel like two people living together, going through the motions.”

“Louis, I… I didn't think…. Fuck. Will you at least do me the courtesy of being honest with me?”

“Of course. I have been… I told Harry I was going to tell you-”

“Oh, that’s big of you, well done. But seriously, Louis. Are you in love with him?”

Louis stilled at the question, not having expected it at all. “I’m not sure. I think I might be. I know I could love him, that I feel something for him, there’s something about him that I can’t… I can’t keep pushing these feelings away, Jess. That’s why I’ve told you… I didn't- I  _ don’t _ want to hurt you. I’m sorry this has happened like this.”

Jess just sighed, rubbing her palms over her face. “Louis, you’re not in love with me anymore, are you? I mean… I love you, I do. But… you’re right. Things haven’t been okay, not for a long time. I think we were broken a long time before Harry came along.”

“I love you, Jess. I always will. But I don’t think I am  _ in _ love with you anymore.” She smiled almost ruefully at him and nodded, as if she was accepting her fate. “I am sorry, I really am.”

“Is… is our marriage over?” Louis couldn’t speak. Instead, he stared at her, pleading with her, not wanting to answer that question. The thought of admitting his marriage was done was frightening, although they both truthfully knew the answer. “Shit. What do we do now?”

Louis just stood and held his arms out to her, hoping she wouldn’t push him away, knowing this could be the last time he had to be with her, to be a husband to her. To his relief, she stood up and walked into his arms, resting her head against his chest as his arms naturally looped around her, as they had done so many times before in the years gone by. His hand stroked through her hair, and he could feel his t-shirt dampen with her tears.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for you,” she whispered, her voice choked up with tears. “Don’t deny it, Lou. I see the way you look at him, and the way he looks back at you. He’s so in love with you.” Louis sighed, realising she was most probably right. The way Harry kissed him last night told him so, and the thought didn't scare him, not at all.

“What do we do now?” Louis said as Jess pulled away from the hug, wiping at her eyes with a tissue she grabbed from the box on the coffee table. “I mean-”

“I’m going to leave.” Jess said it matter of factly, and Louis felt a bit stunned. He assumed he’d be the one to have to leave given he was the bad guy here, but she continued to speak.

“Are you sure? I can go-” Louis didn't want her to feel like she had to leave, but at the same time, it was inevitable one of them was going to have to at some point.

“Louis, don’t argue with me. You and Harry can stay here, sort things out, whatever you want to do. I’m going to go and stay at Mum’s until I can find somewhere else.” Jess steeled herself then, a neutral expression crossing her face as she folded her arms across her chest. “Louis… are you going to make a go of things, with Harry, I mean? You and him and the baby?”

“If he’ll have me,” Louis replied, determined to be honest again, knowing Jess would appreciate his candor.

“Why wouldn’t he want you?” Jess all but whispered back, her eyes shining with unshed tears as she stepped back over to Louis, sliding her wedding band off her finger. She pressed it into Louis’ palm and kissed the back of his hand. “Don’t make this any harder than it has to be. Stay here, and let me go, okay?”

Louis bit his lip, his hands clenching into fists as he tried to fight back the tears. “Okay. Jess, I really didn't mean for this to happen.”

“I know,” she whispered back, sniffing slightly. “Just… be happy, Louis. For me, please. Show me you didn't give up on our marriage for nothing.”

*****

Harry wanted to cry as he finally turned into the road where Louis and Jess’ house was. It had been a long, hard walk home in the June heat, and Harry’s back was screaming out in pain, and his Converse were rubbing painfully on his swollen feet. There was also the fact he really didn't want to go back in that house and find out if Louis really had spoken to Jess about the kiss. He felt that if he had done, Jess wouldn’t want him there anymore, and the thought petrified him because without them, he and his daughter would be homeless. Not his daughter, he reminded himself, shaking his head at the thought.

He let himself in with his key, pausing in the doorway to make sure there was no yelling to be heard, relief filling him when there wasn’t. He sat down on the bottom of the stairs and tugged off his shoes, wincing at how swollen his feet looked, rotating his ankles for a few seconds. He disappeared upstairs and got changed, not wanting Louis or Jess to see him looking a sweaty mess, and reluctantly went back downstairs.

He jumped when he saw Louis stood in the middle of the sitting room, apparently waiting for him to make his entrance. His hands were stuffed into the pockets of his jeans, and he had on one of Harry’s favourite t-shirts, a deep blue one that made his eyes shine. Louis smiled softly, and Harry tried to return it, ignoring the wriggly baby in his belly that was happily kicking away. He must have given something away with his face as Louis’ was quickly marred in concern, the man hurrying over and resting a hand on Harry’s shoulder.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, just… kicking, again,” Harry said, placing his hand on the bump where he could feel the baby kick. Louis looked hesitant so Harry reached out, grabbing Louis’ wrist and putting his hand onto his tummy over his t-shirt. “Feel it?” Louis grinned and nodded, leaving his hand there for a moment before he took it off, tugging Harry towards the sofa where they sat down. “Where’s Jess?” Harry asked, needing to know.

“She’s, um, she’s at her mum’s tonight,” Louis said a little hesitantly, nervously playing with his fingers. “Harry, I spoke to Jess.”

Harry’s heart felt like it stopped in his chest. He was dreading to hear what had happened, but at the same time, he just had to know. He couldn’t speak, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at Louis either, not wanting to read anything in his expression. His eyes flicked up for a moment and he stopped, noticing something he hadn’t seen before.

“Louis, where’s your wedding ring?” His eyes met Louis’ then, and he felt shocked to see tears in Louis’ eyes, and he wanted nothing more than to comfort him, but he didn't know how.

“I just… I don’t- Harry-”

“She’s gone, hasn’t she? She’s left you?”

“Yes but - not exactly, it’s a mutual decision, Harry. Things haven’t been okay, for a while actually. And kissing you… it was just… right. Shit… my marriage is over, Harry, I-”

Louis flopped back against the sofa, and brought his hands up to his face. As much as Harry wanted to touch him, he couldn’t bring himself to. Guilt was flooding his veins at the realisation he was the trigger for Louis’ marriage officially being over, and he was struggling to push down the wave of sickness inside him. Louis removed his hands and looked back over at Harry.

“Harry… you can’t blame yourself. You’ve heard us argue, it’s been rough for a long time. Look at me, love. Please?” Harry reluctantly pulled his head up and looked at Louis, giving him a wobbly smile. “I… I don’t know how you feel about… well, us. If there could ever be an us, or whatever. But you just need to know… I’d like for there to be. An us, I mean.”

Harry couldn’t stop himself from hugging Louis then, leaning forward and wrapping his arms around Louis’ neck, smiling as Louis’ hands rested at the base of his spine. He inhaled Louis’ scent at his neck, realising he no longer had to hide how Louis made him feel.

“Lou, I ... I’ve always wanted, I mean, you’re amazing and I just ... I don’t know if I feel right doing this so soon after, ummm, you know? I want to, god I want to, you’re so  _ amazing _ , but I can’t ... I don’t know ...” he trailed off miserably, unable to word what he wanted to say. His mind was a mess of emotions, of want and desire and love and confusion and shame. He didn't want to cry, but that was exactly what he felt was going to happen.

“Hey, no, that’s okay. It’s a lot, I get that. I just need you to know, Haz, that I… that I want you. But nothing has to change, not if you don’t want it to. We can stay as we are, friends, and just make that work. I promise, we’ll be fine, love.”

Harry kept his clenched fists at his side, biting back the urge to touch Louis and hold him. He couldn’t believe he’d been so lucky as to find someone so supportive and understanding, and he laughed as the baby rolled around again, seeing a slight ripple in his belly at the movement. He stood up and looked down at Louis, pulling him gently to his feet.

“Haz? That okay? That we stay friends, and just be… us?”

“Yes… and no. Just… fuck, just kiss me, Louis.” Louis’ eyes widened but he didn't hesitate for more than a few seconds, placing his hands on Harry’s hips as he moved their bodies closer and finally pressed their lips together. Harry felt like it was better than last night in so many ways - it didn't feel wrong, now that he knew Louis really did want him, and Louis wasn’t doing anything behind Jess’ back.

He sighed slightly into the kiss and tilted his head, letting Louis deepen the kiss, moaning slightly as their tongues touched. He allowed his hands to slip up under the hem of Louis’ t-shirt, loving the feel of his soft skin under his hands, and it was everything he’d been thinking of since he met Louis all those months ago. He felt Louis start to lose himself in it too, and slowly he pulled back, not wanting it to develop into anything more just yet.

“So… we can keep doing that, right?” Louis said with a cheeky grin, Harry nodding in reply as he pecked Louis’ lips again. “Because… you’re a great kisser, and I really like kissing you.”

“I like kissing you, too, but, uh… just kissing, for now? I… I want to take things slow,” Harry admitted, a blush covering his cheeks. He felt relieved to see Louis nod, hoping he hadn’t put the older man off. Their bodies were still close, Harry’s belly still pressed against Louis’ own flat stomach. “So… you wanna just hang out tonight? Watch some telly?”

“Yeah, that sounds great. Shall we order some pizzas or something?” Harry nodded and Louis picked up his phone as Harry snuggled up to his side. Louis let his arm come up and around Harry’s shoulders as they placed their online order, and Harry relished the feeling of having Louis hold him.

“Thank you,” Harry whispered as Louis looked down at him, smiling softly before he kissed him on the end of his nose.

“For what?” Louis asked, stroking Harry’s shoulder with his thumb.

“For understanding, for not rushing me.” Harry bent his neck so Louis could kiss him gently again, and Harry thought he could never get enough of Louis’ lips against his.

“We’ve got time,” Louis reassured him, cupping Harry’s chin with his hand tenderly. “We’ve always got time.”

*****

The next morning, Louis came downstairs to find Harry curled up on the sofa under a blanket, a mug of tea balanced on his bump as he stared intently at the episode of Sunday Brunch on the television. His eyes were glazed over though, and Louis wasn’t entirely sure he was really watching the chefs on screen prepare some sort of chicken dish Louis couldn’t identify.

“Haz?” he called out, watching as Harry jumped from where he sat on the sofa. Harry’s eyes raked around until they settled on Louis, immediately softening as their eyes met. “You’re up early, my love. Everything okay?”

Louis noticed how Harry practically preened at the pet name, and he nodded with an amused smile. “Lou, it’s ten in the morning, it’s not early. Anyway, the baby woke me up kicking away like she was playing for Manchester United or something.” He rubbed his belly then and moved his hand to make way for Louis’, who circled the skin underneath Harry’s t-shirt for a few minutes while they both watched the television.

“Want a cuddle?” Louis asked, and he grinned when Harry nodded and opened up the blanket, letting him slide inside, cuddling up close to Harry’s body. He reluctantly removed himself again for a few minutes to make them both a fresh cup of tea but soon returned. This time, though, Harry had scooted forwards and indicated to Louis to sit behind him. Louis did, and let his hands rest on Harry’s bump, clasped over his belly. He loved that Harry wasn’t stopping the contact, and the way Harry rested back against him felt right somehow.

Louis smiled when the baby kicked against his hand, and he spoke softly to Harry. “Did you sleep okay? I know you’ve had a lot on your mind lately…” Harry just nodded, turning so he could look up at Louis from where he was sat.

“Yeah, I guess. I was weirdly chilly last night, strange considering it’s been hot and I’m usually like a human radiator. But once I got to sleep, I was fine.”

“Well, if you ever need anything in the night, you can just come and wake me up, you know that, yeah?” Harry nodded, and paused for a moment before he decided what he was going to do. He brought one hand up, cupping Louis’ cheek to drag his face down until their lips met. They kissed gently for a few moments until Harry’s back twinged, and he nestled back against Louis. There was silence in the house apart from the TV playing, but it felt perfect to Harry. Louis felt Harry’s body going lax against him but when they heard the sound of a key in the front door, and the hallway door opening, they jumped apart as if they’d been caught doing something they shouldn’t.

Louis didn't miss the look of disdain Jess threw over to where he and Harry were sat on the sofa, and he also didn't miss how Harry’s gaze stayed fixed on the TV, not flitting to where Jess was stood. Louis got up and headed into the hall, following his wife up the stairs, closing their bedroom door behind him as he watched her slide a suitcase out from underneath the bed. She started opening the drawers and pulled out piles of clothes, setting them inside the case, steadfastly ignoring Louis’ presence.

“So are we going to talk about this?” he asked, perching himself on the edge of the mattress, his eyes firmly following her around the room, wishing she’d look at him. “Jess, please-”

“Please what, Louis? What is it exactly you want me to say?” Louis felt as if he had been slapped at her harsh tone, but when he took a breath, he realised she had every right to be upset. “I can’t stay here, not now. Mum is going to take me in for a while until I can find somewhere of my own. Now if you don’t mind, I’d like to get my things together in peace.”

Louis nodded and stood up, leaving the bedroom and shutting the door behind him. He pulled Harry’s bedroom closed before he headed downstairs and rejoined Harry on the sofa, not snuggling up as he had done a short while ago. Harry must have sensed he was tense as he slid over, gently picking up Louis’ hand and placing it in his own. Louis ignored the warm feeling that travelled up his arm as their bare skin touched. They’d touched plenty of times before last night, but now, there was a different atmosphere between them, and everything felt more charged than it ever had. Louis’ body was responding in ways it hadn’t to Jess in too long, and he was determined he wouldn’t put that onto Harry until he was ready.

“Lou? You okay?” Harry asked softly as he pushed a hand through Louis’ fringe, gently moving his hair out of his eyes.  

Louis just sighed and nodded, feeling a bit numb. “Never mind me, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, Lou. She didn't speak to me, not yet, anyway. But it’s your marriage, remember? I just… I want to be there for you, if that’s what you want.”

“I do want that,” Louis replied, leaning in to peck Harry’s lips to reassure him. Harry smiled softly at that. “It’s just weird, you know? I mean, I told you things haven’t been good for a while, but now it’s actually over, it’s odd. She’s packing at the mo, she’s going to stay with her mum so I guess it’s just you and me here for a while.”

Harry nodded, biting his lip, unsure what to say. He winced as a wave of nausea hit him, breathing deeply to ward off the idea he was going to suddenly throw up. “Oh god, Lou would you mind grabbing me a couple of crackers? I haven’t eaten and I feel icky all of a sudden.” Louis nodded and hurried off to the kitchen.

Harry took a few deep breaths, getting up to walk around a bit, hoping that would stop him throwing up. He turned around just as Jess came down the stairs and he stopped dead, not really sure what to do, and Louis hovered in the sitting room, watching with wide eyes as the pair just stared each other down. He held his breath, somehow knowing that Harry was going to be the bigger one and speak first.

“Jess… I, I’m so sorry. I promise I never intended for any of this to happen, I didn't-”

“Harry, just leave it. I honestly don’t want to hear it right now, I’d just like to get my things and leave.” Harry just nodded and turned around, heading over to Louis and taking the crackers, sinking into the armchair, avoiding Louis’ eyes. Louis took in the way Harry’s body was tense, tears filling his eyes as he clutched the blanket that he now draped over his legs. His hands were placed on his bump in an almost protective manner, and Louis wanted nothing more than to dash over and comfort his… friend, but he couldn’t do that in front of Jess, not right now anyway.

“Let me grab your case for you,” Louis mumbled, sprinting up the stairs and returning with her case in his hand a few minutes later. “Do you need a hand with this, or anything-”

“Louis, I don’t want or need anything from you, okay? But can we talk, outside?” Louis nodded and followed Jess outside, heaving her suitcase up into the boot of her car without being asked. He’d been doing things like that for her for years now, and the fact their marriage was over didn't mean he was going to stop being himself around her. “Right, can I be blunt?”

“Yes, of course.” Louis nodded, folding his arms across his chest.

“What’s happening with the baby? You and I aren’t going to be raising her so what’s your plan? Are you going to raise her with Harry? I know I mentioned it the other night but I want… I need to know.”

“Um, we haven’t really talked about that, but that’s what I’m hoping for,” Louis said nervously. “I mean, um, you have rights too, we signed the paperwork together, so-”

“Louis, I’m not that much of a bitch. If raising Harry’s baby together is what you and he both want, then I can’t stand in your way. I won’t come between that. I can see how much he likes you, and how much the idea of giving his baby up hurts him.”

“Thank you,” Louis whispered, unsure what else to say to convey his gratitude. “I’m going to talk to him when we… when we work out what’s happening between us.” She nodded, stepping over to her car door.

“Look, I’ll be in touch, okay? We have a lot to sort out but I need a bit of space. I’m hurting, Lou, so I need some distance from you. I hope you understand that?”

“I do, I promise. Balls in your court, but I’m at the end of the phone whenever you’re ready to talk. I’m just… I’m so sorry it’s ended up this way. I know our marriage wasn’t perfect Jess, but I did love you… I do love you.”

“Just not in the same way you love Harry, right?”  Louis didn't answer that, still not fully sure he was completely there with Harry, not yet, but the fact it was well within the realms of possibility made it something he couldn’t acknowledge to her. “Take care, Louis.” She got into her car and he took a few steps, raising a hand to wave as she drove away, probably for the first last time, fully out of their marriage. Louis headed back inside and found Harry on the sofa again, staring up at him.

“Come here,” Harry whispered, and Louis collapsed onto the sofa, wriggling over until their bodies were mushed together, one of his hands on Harry’s belly, needing the grounding touch of him right now. “I’m so sorry, Lou.”

Louis started to cry softly. He wasn’t crying over the end of his marriage, not exactly. But it was an emotional moment, the full realisation that his wife had just left him, and his two year marriage was over. Jess had been in his life such a long time, and now she wouldn’t be. But looking up at Harry, the man who was offering him unconditional comfort and quite possibly everything Louis had ever wanted, a flash of hope ran through him, and he gave Harry a wobbly smile, pleased when Harry returned it, kissing his head before they curled up again, just the two of them against the world.

*****

The next couple of days passed by relatively normally for the pair. Louis still had work to go to everyday, and Harry was working hard at his college work, his tutors giving him plenty to keep him busy at home so he didn't have to worry too much about walking to and from the college with his heavy books. Louis helped out with lifts as much as he could, but he was keen that Harry didn't walk too far, especially now his bump was getting ever bigger.

Tuesday evening saw Louis mowing the lawn while Harry watched on from the patio, sitting out on a lounge chair in a tiny pair of yellow shorts that Louis found positively indecent. That just inspired Harry to wear them even more, hoiking the waistband right under his bump, exposing his ever-growing belly more and more. He looked deathly pale thanks to the heavy layer of sunscreen he’d applied to his torso, but he felt relaxed out in the fresh air, hating being cooped. Plus, seeing a sweaty Louis march around with the mower was always a good sight to watch.

“You missed a spot,” Harry called, pointing to a long tuft of grass over by one of the borders. “Not exactly Alan Titchmarsh, are you love?” Louis just stuck his middle finger up at Harry as he headed that way with the mower, making Harry cackle loudly. Once Louis was done and emptying the mower’s bin, Harry heaved himself off the lounger and headed for the border, stopping to admire a few flowers growing there. They were clearly hardy plants as neither Louis or Jess ever seemed to do much gardening.

Louis came and wrapped his arms around Harry’s warm belly, kissing his shoulder blade gently as he looked down at the colourful blooms with Harry. “You like flowers, babe?”

“Yeah, they make me smile,” Harry nodded, pointing to a couple in particular. “I love those, gerberas, they’re called. So colourful. I love peonies as well, and sunflowers.” Louis nodded, clearly not having a clue about what Harry was talking about. “Never mind, babe. Yes, I like flowers, let’s leave it at that.” Louis chuckled as Harry turned around in his hold, his arms around Louis’ neck. “Mmm, you’re all sweaty.”

“You love it,” Louis teased. The sexual tension had been bubbling between them slightly lately, their kisses becoming a bit deeper, and Harry was always seeming to hold himself back from doing any more than that, which Louis was still fine with. He had the shower, and he had his right hand. God knows he’d made it many months with just that as Jess hadn’t wanted to have sex for too long, but now, Louis was craving something more.

“I do,” Harry mumbled, pressing their lips together chastely before he pulled away. “I’m going to make dinner while you clear up out here.”

“Ooh, right little housewife aren’t you?” Louis called, and Harry couldn’t miss the grin Louis sent him as he turned around and nodded, dragging one of Louis’ t-shirts over his head as he stepped inside, fishing out the chicken breasts he and Louis had bought earlier that day when they’d done the big shop. Harry had enjoyed dragging Louis up and down the aisles, grabbing everything he’d need to feed the two of them for a week, Louis refusing to accept a penny from Harry at the checkout. It had felt scarily domestic, and Harry loved it.

They ate together at the table that night, Harry wrapping his swollen ankles around Louis’, always enjoying some point of contact with him. Louis insisted on washing up while Harry did a little more reading for college until he felt his head start to nod with tiredness.

“Oi, let’s get you to bed,” Louis mumbled into his ear, switching off the telly and picking up Harry’s book from where it was laid on out his tummy. He bent down and pressed a kiss to the bump before he stood up, and Harry kissed his lips quickly when they were standing together. He linked their hands as they headed upstairs, brushing their teeth next to each other as they got ready for bed.

“Um, Lou?” Harry asked, not quite believing he was feeling brave enough to ask for this now. Louis turned and looked at Harry, waiting for him to say something more. “Would you mind coming and giving me a cuddle? In my bed, I mean? I just miss cuddles, and I thought it might be nice…”

“You don’t even have to ask, love,” Louis said with a big grin. “Let me just get into my comfy clothes and I’ll be with you.” He disappeared into his bedroom and Harry hurriedly slipped into a baggy tank top , forgoing shorts since the waistband had started feeling uncomfortable while he slept. He knew Louis wouldn’t mind, so he got into bed, already feeling much more comfortable when the mattress dipped behind him and Louis’ slender arm snaked over his waist.

“This okay?” Louis whispered, and Harry just nodded, grasping his hand over his belly. “You not sleeping well, or something?”

“Nah, nothing like that,” Harry mumbled back, half asleep already. “I’m just a cuddly person, I used to love being cuddled to sleep. Steve always made out I was a nuisance.” Harry could almost feel Louis frown at that, and he smiled to himself as Louis moved closer, Harry pushing his calf back between Louis’.

“You’re not a nuisance, not at all. Anytime you want a cuddle, I’m here, okay?” Louis waited for a reply, and when one didn't come, he propped himself up on one elbow and looked over to see Harry fast asleep, a curl of his hair blowing up with every exhale of breath. Louis just continued rubbing gently over his belly as Harry slept, promising himself he would stay just five more minutes.

*****

Harry stirred from what felt like the best sleep he had had in a long time. The baby was kicking in his belly, and he whispered to her to try and calm her down a little. He stretched his arms backwards and paused when he felt something behind him, something he hadn’t felt before. He looked back over his shoulder and saw Louis’ body. He was still sound asleep, and Harry realised then in his half-asleep state that his legs were tangled with Louis’, and Louis’ morning wood was pressing up against his thigh. Harry swallowed, wondering how to deal with this.

“Lou. Louis.” He whispered quietly, shaking Louis’ shoulder until he started to wake up, inhaling deeply before his eyes flew open and he sat up, clearly aware of his erection against Harry’s body. “Louis-”

“Shit. Oh my god, I’m so sorry, Haz. I promise I intended to go to my own bed, I did, but you were so warm and cosy, I must have fallen asleep…”

“Don’t. It’s fine...I… I like waking up with you.” Careful of his tummy, he rolled himself over until he was facing Louis, loving how beautiful he looked in the morning, his hair sticking up all over the place and eyes soft. “Morning, Lou.” He leaned in and kissed Louis softly, not caring about either of them having morning breath. “You working today?”

“Mmm,” Louis said, nodding sleepily, burying his face into Harry’s neck. “Yeah, you still going in to college?”

“I am,” Harry said, feeling more awake now. He winced as the baby kicked hard, Louis laughing as he felt it up against his own stomach. “She’s awake, clearly. I’m sure she knows when you’re around, she’s always more active when she hears your voice.” Louis blushed at that, but looked ridiculously pleased. “Come on, we need to get up and get going.”

Louis got out of bed first, and Harry averted his eyes while Louis adjusted himself in his shorts, trying to mask his morning erection, Harry doing the same under the covers. As much as he was attracted to Louis and wanted nothing more than to touch him, especially when he was aroused like this, he knew he couldn’t, not yet. He needed to straighten his thoughts out in his head and work out what it was he really wanted, and he knew Louis would give him as long as they needed.

They shared breakfast together and Louis insisted on driving Harry over to college, even going so far as to help him lug his bag of books into his classroom, introducing himself to Harry’s tutor as his friend, something Harry appreciated. Louis kissed his cheek before he left, and Harry knew his cheeks were flaming as a few of the younger women in his class cooed over Louis’ attention to Harry.

Harry’s day at college went relatively well. He received high marks on the latest assignment he had submitted, and practically skipped out to Louis’ car at the end of the day, a wide grin on his face. The skin of his belly was feeling a little itchy which he was trying to ignore but he knew Louis had spotted him clawing at it on the drive home.

“What’s wrong?” Louis asked, eyes flitting across in concern as Harry gave up having any dignity and just hitched his top up, itching his bare skin with his nails, trying to get some relief. “Is something hurting?”

“No, I don’t think so.... I think because my belly is growing so fast the skin is stretching and it’s itching like hell. Think I just need a cold shower. Oh! I got that assignment back, the one you read through for me last week before-” Harry cut himself off, realising he was going to say ‘ _ before I kissed you and Jess left’ _ , and dropped his gaze back to his belly. “Um, yeah, so I did really well, I got 94%.”

“Oh my god! Haz, that’s amazing! Well done, love. I knew you’d smash it. Remember you have that cream at home as well, the one the midwife talked about. Maybe you should give that a try?” Louis grinned across before directing his eyes back on the road, taking what Harry thought was the wrong turn at the roundabout. Soon, Louis pulled into a space and Harry frowned, peering up at the shop Louis had stopped outside of. “Wait here, I just need to grab a couple of things. I won’t be a tick.” Harry nodded and pulled out his phone, scrolling through his emails and calendar to check for appointments, pleased to see he didn't have much on this week.

He jumped when there came a slight tap at his window, and Louis was stood outside with his hands behind his back, beckoning him out with odd jerks of his head. Harry unclipped his seatbelt and hoisted himself out of the car, a hand on his belly as he stood up straight, pulling the hem of his t-shirt down a bit so he was covered up. “Lou?”

“Um. Well. I was in the shop and I… um, well I just want you to know I’m really proud of you, Haz. You amaze me, and… yeah, these are for you.” From behind his back, Louis thrust a bunch of bright pink gerberas at Harry, wrapped loosely in a soft yellow tissue paper. Harry felt stunned but reached out to take the flowers, his fingers brushing Louis’ as he did so. He could feel his cheeks heat up and he smiled, feeling so touched Louis had done something so kind for him.

“Oh my god, Lou… you didn't have to…. They’re so beautiful, thank you so much.” He brought them up to his face and inhaled their soft scent before he looked back up to Louis. He took a couple of steps until they were stood so close, his belly was against Louis’. Louis looked down and grinned at the touch, and brought his hands up to rest on the top of the bump. “Thank you so much.”

He peered shyly up at Louis then and leaned in, kissing Louis softly in the middle of the carpark, not caring who was looking at them. He felt Louis melt into the kiss, and parted his lips, letting Louis’ tongue come inside gently for a few moments, savouring the taste of the man pressed up against him. Harry felt himself getting worked up and reluctantly pulled back, pecking Louis’ lips a few more times before he stood up straight again, wide eyes on Louis.

“Wow,” Louis mumbled, clearing his throat quickly. “That was, um, amazing. I need more of that please.” Harry chuckled at that, and noticed the carrier bag still hanging from the crook of Louis’ elbow. “Oh yeah, got you some of your favourite chocolates as well, I know Mum craved the sweet stuff when she was pregnant?” It came out like a question, and again, Harry was floored when Louis handed the bag out to him.

Harry fished inside and pulled out a selection of his favourite guilty pleasures, and felt himself get tearful at the thoughtful gesture. “Oh god, sorry, I’m an emotional wreck,” he mumbled as he wiped at the tears about to fall, feeling embarrassed he was being so soppy. “Just… no-one’s taken care of me like for a long time, Lou. This means so much to me, thank you.” Louis crowded into Harry’s personal space again and hugged him close for a minute, kissing his cheek as he pulled away.

“Come on, let’s get you home so you can stuff your face and rest.” Harry giggled and nodded, carefully putting the flowers on the backseat alongside his carrier bag of much needed chocolate bars, and Louis made the short drive home to their house, taking special care over the speed bumps as he knew they made Harry uncomfortable. Louis took the flowers into the house and put them in a vase which he placed on the sitting room window, and when Harry re-appeared in the sitting room in much comfier clothes that didn't restrict his belly, he couldn’t stop himself smiling at the sight of them, cheering up the room easily.

“I’m making chili for dinner, is that alright?” Louis called from the kitchen. Harry padded through to the kitchen, loving the sight of Louis moving easily around the room. He looked at Harry and smiled at him softly, and Harry couldn’t help the hand that came up to rest on his bump as his baby girl kicked inside him. “You look beautiful, Harry.”

“Thank you, Lou,” Harry whispered back, suddenly feeling shy. “I love chili, thank you for cooking.” Louis walked over and sat his hands on Harry’s round belly, grinning up when the baby kicked at his palm. After a few seconds, he moved away and began cooking again. Harry sat at the kitchen table with one of his school books, reading quietly while Louis sang to himself, the smell of the delicious food filling the kitchen, and before he knew it, Harry had a plate of rice and chili in front of him, Louis sat next to him. They ate while they chatted, Harry’s feet sat on top of Louis’ under the table.

They watched television for a while until Louis was yawning loudly, and Harry gently nudged him with his foot, stirring Louis from his sleepy state. Louis blinked blearily at him and rested a hand on Harry’s ankle, stroking the skin gently as he waited for Harry to speak.

“Go to bed, Lou. You’re absolutely knackered, have an early night. I think I will too, actually.” Harry pushed himself up off the sofa, stumbling forward slightly thanks to his altered centre of gravity, and he winced at a twinge in his back. Louis watched on in concern before he stood, placing a hand at the small of Harry’s back, pressing down lightly. “God, that’s nice, thanks.” Louis smiled and they just stood there for a few moments until Harry’s pain subsided, and Louis busied himself, locking the doors and taking their glasses out into the kitchen.

Harry made his way upstairs, clutching the banister as he went before he headed into his room. He stripped off into his night clothes and threw his clothes into the laundry basket in the corner of the room, leaving his room and heading down the hallway to the bathroom. Louis was already in there, removing his contact lenses, and Harry squeezed past him to grab his toothbrush, his belly brushing against Louis’ lower back. Louis turned and smiled back at him before he stood up straighter, making more room for Harry to get by.

Harry put a strip of toothpaste on his pink toothbrush before picking Louis’ up and doing the same, setting it down on the side of the sink, touching Louis’ shoulder before he pointed to it, his own brush in his mouth by now.

“Thank you, love,” Louis said, leaning in to kiss Harry’s cheek, making Harry blush at the contact. They brushed their teeth side by side, and when Harry was done, he hung around outside the door, intent on wishing Louis a good night before they went to bed. When Louis emerged, he stepped in front of him and wasted no time in hugging Louis,  looping his long arms around his neck, enjoying how warm and tiny Louis felt against him. “Hey, what’s this for?”

“Just wanted to hug you goodnight and say thank you for being so lovely to me today… the flowers, chocolates and cooking me dinner. I, um, I appreciate it, Lou. It’s been a while since anyone’s taken care of me like this, so I wanted you to know I’m really grateful.” He grazed his lips against Louis’ cheek, enjoying the slight stubble littering his jaw before he pulled away. Harry reached up and wiped the skin with the pad of his thumb, rubbing away any trace of his kiss before he walked back to his room, turning around before he stepped inside. “Sweet dreams, Louis.”

“You too, Harry. Hope that little lady lets you get some sleep.” Louis winked before he went into his bedroom and closed the door behind him. Harry sighed and stepped into his room, kissing the little scan photo before he slid into bed. He didn't feel hugely tired so he picked up his book and read a good chunk before his eyes started to feel heavy. He popped his bookmark between the pages and laid down, trying to get comfortable.

Sleeping while pregnant was a nightmare, and Harry was finding it increasingly difficult. The midwife had recommended a special pillow but Harry hadn’t yet saved up enough to buy one, so he was making do with a spare pillow he’d found in the linen closet. He had it shoved between his legs, but his bump just felt so awkward. He tossed and turned for a while, wishing he had a magic cure to make him sleep. Steve used to hug him to sleep, letting Harry be the little spoon despite being much larger than the other man, and Harry realised then what it was he wanted.

He peered across at the little clock on his bedside table and cringed when he saw it was already gone midnight. He quietly rolled out of bed and stood up, stretching his back out before he tiptoed across the room, opening his door as quietly as he could. He waited outside Louis’ door for a few minutes as he worked up the courage to do what he wanted. In the end, he just went for it, knowing if he stood there much longer, he’d chicken out and end up back in bed alone and unable to sleep.

He gently knocked on the door, and when he heard nothing, he pushed the handle down and the door creaked open. Harry peered into the pitch black room, and he jumped slightly when the room was suddenly filled with light, Louis sitting up in a sleepy panic, looking Harry up and down for any sign of distress.

“Harry? What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is it the baby-”

“Lou, I’m fine,” Harry hurried to say, wanting to put Louis’ mind at ease. “I just, um…”

“What is it? Do you need something? Just tell me, I’ll do anything you need babe.” Harry was pleased the room was fairly dark as he knew he was blushing at that term of endearment, and he nervously fiddling with his t-shirt, pulling the fabric down over his bump, stretching it slightly. “Harry…”

“Okay, um, I just… will you come to bed with me, and um, hug me? Please?” Harry felt nothing but relief when Louis broke out into a huge grin and nodded, swinging his legs out of bed. Harry averted his eyes when he realised Louis was only wearing boxers, and Louis paused, sensing Harry was a little awkward.

“Sorry, I forgot, I’ll put some clothes on if you want me to…?” He tailed off, but just reached for Harry’s hand when the other man shook his head, his curls flying about as he did so. Louis flicked off his light, and used the torch on his phone to follow Harry into his bedroom, their fingers still laced together. He let Harry crawl into bed first, arranging the covers to make sure Harry’s back was covered before he slid into bed next to him. Harry loved the way the mattress dipped next to him, telling him he wasn’t alone, and he stayed on his back for a moment until he felt too uncomfortable. “How do you want to do this, love?” Louis whispered.

“Um, can I be little spoon? Like, you cuddle up to me?” He felt Louis nod and rolled over so his back was to Louis, and just seconds later, he felt Louis’ torso press up against him, an arm coming over his side and a hand resting on his bump. Harry smiled to himself before he took Louis’ hand in his own, letting his eyes close, feeling settled and at home in Louis’ arms. Despite his hesitance about jumping into anything with Louis, little things like this were making Harry realise perhaps he and Louis were more perfect for each other than either of them realised.

He shivered as he felt Louis’ warm lips on the back of his neck, kissing the soft skin there gently. “Goodnight, Harry.”

“Night, Lou. Thank you… for coming in here with me.”

“Anytime, love. I promise.”

Harry only realised as he was about to slip into sleep that not only had he woken up with Louis in his bed that morning, but he was falling asleep with him in his bed too. And the thought that falling asleep with Louis wasn’t the only thing he was falling into hit him… and he didn't feel as scared as he thought he would.

*****

The next morning, Harry crept out of bed without waking Louis, who was snoring softly, an arm tucked under his head, one leg kicked out of the covers, exposing a length of tanned bare thigh to Harry, who struggled to drag his eyes away from the sight. Louis’ body was something else, and the more Harry got to see of it, the more he wanted to see all of it. He couldn’t resist stroking his fingertips up Louis’ leg, noting how soft the hairs on his skin were, and how warm Louis’ skin was at his touch.

Harry stood up, scratching at the itchy and dry skin of his belly before he remembered Louis mentioning a cream he’d bought him a while ago. Harry opened the curtains enough to let a little morning light in, and padded over to his toiletries bag, rifling through until he found the tube of cream. He lifted off his t-shirt and popped the cap and sniffed, loving the soft lavender scent and squirted a little out into his palm. He dipped the tip of his index finger in and rubbed a little into his belly, checking he liked the texture and sensation before he got a little more, rubbing it into the sides, enjoying how soft his skin felt as he massaged the cream in gently. The baby wasn’t kicking yet, and he was hoping she wouldn’t wake up at his touch.

“Harry, I-” Harry whirled around, struck by how beautiful Louis looked, sat in his bed with the sheet pooled around his hips. His hair was sticking up in all directions, his stubble was dark on his jawline but Harry thought Louis had never looked more perfect. Harry couldn’t deny the look of adoration in Louis’ eyes as he stared at him, and for once, Harry didn't feel at all conscious of his body. He dropped his hands, and locked eyes with Louis, something passing between them for a moment before Louis spoke again. “Can… can I?” His eyes flitted down to the tube in Harry’s hand, and Harry realised what he meant.

Wordlessly, he stretched his hand out, Louis taking the cream from him carefully before he opened it and put a little onto the palm of his hand. He rubbed both hands together before he stood up and stopped in front of Harry. Slowly, and so carefully, he placed both of his hands on Harry’s belly, starting to rub in small circles, transferring the cream from his own hands to Harry’s skin. It was an innocent touch, but Harry felt himself responding to the touch and intimacy of the moment.

“I can’t believe I get to do this… to touch you, to…” Louis trailed off, licking his lips slowly. “Harry, I…”

“I know,” Harry whispered back, not needing to hear the words to understand what it was Louis was trying to say. “Me too, Lou.” Harry didn't flinch as Louis pulled the waistband of his boxers right down, until they were almost hanging off his lower half, exposing the top of his pubic hair to Louis, who just grazed it with his fingers, staring up at Harry reverently. Harry had no idea why Louis had this effect on him, why he wanted Louis to touch him and see him, but it was what he wanted more than anything.

“Louis… kiss me,  _ please, _ ” Harry begged, not caring how desperate he sounded. Louis’ hands on him were making him want to be close to Louis, and now Harry didn't have to stop himself, he didn't even try. He felt grateful when Louis didn't hesitate and just cupped Harry’s face, pulling them together until their lips met in the middle. Harry let Louis lead the kiss, parting his lips when he felt Louis wanting more, and his whole body was covered in goosebumps at how good Louis made him feel. It was a deep kiss, both men trying to communicate what they couldn’t say with words, and Harry knew then that he was heading down a path there was no way back from.

They pulled away after a few moments, and Louis slowly dropped to his knees, running his hands all over Harry’s bump and hips, touching every inch of him. When he was done, he leaned in and gently pressed a kiss to where Harry’s belly button had popped before he began to whisper to Harry’s stomach, his hands cradling it, thumbs moving back and forth over the cream slick skin.

“Hey, baby girl. I hope you’re being a good girl in there, your Daddy is doing a great job in growing you. I can’t wait to meet you, you’re going to be so beautiful, I just know it.” He kissed the bump again before he stood up. He glanced at the clock, wrinkling his nose when he saw it was time to be getting ready for work. “I don’t want to leave you,” he said reluctantly, reaching for Harry’s hand and kissing the back of it.

“I’ll be fine, Lou. I’ll make us dinner for when you get home, yeah? Fajitas?”

“That would be amazing. I’ll go and get ready for work, but promise you’ll call me if you need anything?” Harry nodded and let Louis kiss him again before he left the room, Harry’s eyes on his neat little backside in his boxers as Louis walked away from him. Harry pulled on a t-shirt, wincing at its tightness before he realised it was Louis’ and left it on anyway, loving wearing the other man’s clothes. He crept downstairs and quickly pulled together a lunch for Louis, putting it in a lunchbox he found in one of the cupboards.

Louis came into the kitchen and made them both tea and toast while Harry looked through the work he had to do today, but soon, it was time for Louis to leave. Harry handed over the lunch, which Louis accepted with a grateful kiss, usually resorting to getting something from the work cafeteria as he never bothered making himself lunch, and Jess wasn’t the sort to do that kind of thing either. Harry watched from the table as Louis walked off, and he could hear him putting his shoes on and Louis called out bye before Harry had a realisation and pushed back from the table quickly, the chair tumbling to the floor behind him as Harry sped out of the kitchen as quickly as he could.

“Lou! Wait!” Harry panted as he stopped on the driveway, Louis hopping out of his car, his eyes raking all over Harry’s body. Harry was aware he looked sleepy, he was wearing a top three sizes too small that was ridden up halfway over his belly with tight shorts that did nothing to hide his growing form, and his curls were piled up on top of his head in a small top knot. He looked a mess, but he knew neither him or Louis cared.

“Harry?”

“Louis… I want this. I want us. I know I said I wasn’t sure, that I wanted to wait. But I don’t. I just… I hope you want that too?” Louis stood for a few moments, just staring at Harry, letting the words sink in. Harry felt more nervous as time ticked on, and he wondered if he’d made a horrible mistake, ready to backtrack. “I mean, if you want to wait, that’s fine, but I just-”

He was cut off by Louis rounding the car and pulling him into a deep kiss, right there on his driveway where anyone could see. Harry’s hands automatically flew up to rest on Louis’ hips and he let Louis push his tongue into his mouth, moaning slightly at how close their bodies were, only separated by the swell of Harry’s stomach between them.

“Fuck, you know I want that… I want you, Harry. So much, god-” He kissed him again, and Harry couldn’t stop the smile crossing his face then. “You mean it? You want this?”

“I do, I promise,” Harry reassured him, reaching down to hold both of Louis’ hands in his own. “So, we’re…” He suddenly felt nervous to say the words and bit his lips, looking into Louis’ deep blue eyes.

“Boyfriends?” Louis jumped in, and Harry nodded shyly, loving the sound of the word on Louis’ lips. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to call you my boyfriend, Harry.”

“Really?” Harry asked, still unable to believe that perhaps Louis had wanted him as long as he’s wanted Louis, that his pining perhaps wasn’t as one sided as he had originally thought. “Shit, I wish you didn't have to go to work now…”

“We’ll celebrate tonight, okay?” He kissed Harry once more, and bent to kiss Harry’s bump before he got back to his feet, and touched Harry’s cheek gently. “See you later, boyfriend.” He winked at Harry as he got back in the car and drove off, tooting the horn as he did so. Harry waved before he headed back inside, grinning to himself at what he’d just done. He and Louis were officially a couple. Louis was his boyfriend. That thought was enough to keep a smile on Harry’s face for the rest of the day.

*****

“Oh, I got a letter earlier from the community midwives,” Harry said, passing the letter across the table to Louis. Harry had cooked them fajitas as promised, but they’d indulged in a bit of a kissing session on the sofa as soon as Louis had arrived back from work which had put them behind schedule a bit. “It’s about, um, antenatal classes.”

Louis stopped, his fork halfway to his mouth as his eyes met Harry’s for a moment. “And you want to go?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Harry said, shrugging his shoulders, not sure how to approach Louis about going with him. “But I mean, I think, um, maybe, it might be good if… you come too?”

“Well, yeah, I was hoping you’d want me to come,” Louis said, pushing the fork of salad into his mouth as Harry rolled another fajita, avoiding Louis’ gaze. “I mean, if I’m going to be at the birth, and I’m raising this baby too, I need a bit of an idea what to do to help you. What?” He noticed Harry looking at him with a peculiar expression, and wondered if he’d said something wrong.

“You… raising this baby too? Louis- what?”

“Shit. Um… fuck. I just… I assumed that since Jess has gone that we would, I don’t know, well, raise your baby…. I mean,  _ our _ baby, together? Like, a family, I guess?” Louis looked horribly nervous, and all of a sudden, Harry found himself wanting nothing more than what Louis had just offered him.

“I don’t… I can keep her? She can be ours?” Harry had tears in his eyes now, and Louis practically ran around the table to crouch in front of Harry between his legs, one hand holding Harry’s, the other on his bump. “Louis… please tell me you mean it,  _ please.” _

Harry could see tears in Louis’ eyes now, and Louis nodded, still stroking Harry’s belly. “Yeah, love. I… I’m sorry I said it like this, and so soon, but… I want this. I would like to make a real go of this, with our baby girl. I want to raise her with you, Harry, I want to be her Papa.”

“But Jess… I, she signed the paperwork…”

“I’ve spoken to her. She knows what I want. She’s… accepting, I think the word would be. But Harry… I need to know this is okay, that you want to keep your baby, that I’m not forcing you into something that you feel you have to accept-”

“Louis, no. I never wanted to give up my baby, I only did this because I felt I had no choice. I wasn’t in a position to raise her, not alone. But… well, now I have you, and that’s everything I ever wanted. A family. My own little family.” Louis pulled Harry into a kiss then, and Harry’s tears fell as Louis kissed him exactly as he wanted to be kissed.

“You mean so much to me, Haz. And so do you, little girl,” Louis said, lifting the hem of Harry’s shirt to kiss his bare belly, eyes shutting as he did so. “My little family.”

*****

“Oww, fuck!” Harry winced as he twisted his body to get into the car, and Louis supported his weight with his arms as much as he could, wishing there was more he could do. “Shit, stupid fucking yoga.... Thanks Lou.” He relaxed back into the seat and allowed Louis to lift his bag into the boot before he sat next to him behind the steering wheel, eyes flicking over to Harry in concern. “Don’t start, Louis…”

“I’m not, I just think maybe you should ease off the yoga a bit if it’s hurting your body that much? And yes, I know it’s a pregnancy class but even so… just, be careful, yeah?” Harry nodded and leaned his head back against the headrest, shutting his eyes, his body still aching from the positions he’d contorted himself into, and the spasm running down his left leg wasn’t abating at all. He knew what would help but there was no way he could risk it, not yet, not at 32 weeks pregnant. Everything felt dangerous at the moment, and Harry was struggling with his loss of independence the bigger he got.

When they arrived home, Louis helped Harry get out of the car and supported him all the way to the front door where he left Harry while he grabbed the bags. Harry hobbled into the sitting room, lifting his feet so Louis could pull off his trainers and socks, and exhaled, leaning against the back of the sofa.

“Right, that’s it. Get upstairs, you’re getting in the shower. It’s the only way your muscles will relax. Come on.” Harry nodded and let Louis lead him up the stairs, Louis taking it entirely at Harry’s pace. By the time Harry reached the top of the stairs, he wanted to cry, his muscles screaming in protest but he hobbled into the bathroom, struggling with undressing himself until Louis took over. “Is this… okay?” Louis asked, helping Harry pull his top over his head, throwing it on the floor behind the pair of them. Harry just nodded, and Louis left Harry in his boxers and went to leave, but in a moment of madness, Harry reached out, grabbing Louis’ wrist, stopping him in his tracks.

“Stay? Please? I… I don’t want to fall or something, and I’d feel better if you were there.” Harry knew he was blushing but Louis just nodded, stepping out of his clothes until he was in his boxers, like Harry. It wasn’t the first time Harry had seen Louis in his underwear, but there was something different about it now they were officially a couple, and Harry couldn’t stop himself reaching out and touching Louis’ bare body, staring at him in awe. “You’re so gorgeous, Lou. I… I’m sorry about my stretch marks, I know I’ve gotten really big lately, and my body has changed so much-”

Louis pressed his hand against Harry’s mouth and stopped him before he removed it and kissed Louis’ lips gently. “You’re perfect. I promise. Your stretch marks are wonderful because you’re growing a baby, Haz. Your body is making room for her, and I love it. I promise your body turns me on… you have nothing to worry about. I’ll keep my boxers on, I’ll just be here for a support, okay?”

Harry shook his head and brought Louis’ hands over to the waistband of his own boxers, heart thudding wildly in his chest. “No. I… I want to see all of you, Lou. Please?” Louis let out a shaky breath and pushed Harry’s boxers down his thighs until they fell around his ankles, leaving him bare in front of Louis for the first time.  Harry could see Louis’ body responding behind the confines of his underwear, and he hooked his long fingers in the elastic of Louis’ boxers too, letting Louis nod before he tugged them down, both men naked now. The air was thick with tension between them, and Louis reached to turn on the shower, the sound of falling water breaking the silence between them. They just continued to stare at one another, Harry realising quickly this marked a whole new stage in their relationship, one he felt ready for at last.

Louis stepped into the cubicle first and put his hand out for Harry to take, the heavily pregnant man following Louis in. They stood under the spray together, the water coating both of their bodies, and Louis kissed Harry gently, his hands moving around Harry’s body, coming to rest of his bare backside. Harry moaned lowly at the touch, having been starved of affection for months now, and Louis touching him felt like so much and not nearly enough at the same time.

Wordlessly, Louis reached out to the little shelf and picked up what he knew to be Harry’s bodywash, squeezing some into his palms before he motioned for Harry to turn around. Harry did so, his hands trembling as he reached up to move his hair away from his face, and he could feel himself shivering as Louis’ hands made contact with his back, rubbing the soap into his skin. They dipped down to his backside, and cleaned him gently before Louis used his hands on his hips to turn Harry back around. Harry felt very exposed all of a sudden as Louis washed over his chest, Harry hissing as his fingers brushed his sensitive nipples.

“God… you’re stunning, Harry,” Louis whispered, bending down to kiss Harry’s chest gently. His hand slid lower down, and his fingers traced the side of Harry’s cock, making Harry blush. “Can I… can I make you feel good, baby?” Harry felt stunned that Louis was being so bold, and his breathing deepened as he nodded, nerves setting in now Louis was clear in his intentions. “Harry…”

Louis stepped closer under the spray and pulled Harry into a deep kiss, his tongue delving deep into Harry’s mouth as his tongue played with Harry’s, tasting each other and making both men moan. Harry’s heart was racing, and he could feel his body responding the close proximity with Louis, and the fact they were both naked was driving his mind insane. Louis continued to stroke his fingers along the Harry’s shaft, and the pregnant man whined, kissing Louis, desperate for more.

“Touch me, Louis… please-” Harry begged, mumbling the words into Louis’ mouth. “Oh fuck-” Louis’ fingers grasped his cock firmly and began to drag up and down, his thumb gliding over Harry’s slit, making him cry out. Harry’s belly bumped into Louis’ firm stomach, and Louis used his other hand to support Harry against his lower back, holding their bodies together.

“Love feeling your belly against me, our baby growing inside you…” Louis muttered. Harry just closed his eyes and allowed Louis to start stroking him faster, his hand gliding easily thanks to the water streaming down over their bodies. Harry panted with pleasure, his body in overload thanks to being deprived of anything but his own hand for so long, and he didn't hold back from his moans either, his forehead falling until it landed on Louis’ shoulder, their bodies moulding together, a perfect fit. “Feel good, baby?”

“So good, Lou, oh god…” Harry just shut his eyes and focused on the pleasure Louis was giving him, on how good he felt, how pleased he was to finally be intimate with Louis after so much want and longing for the older man. Louis continued to whisper words into Harry’s ear as he stroked him, harder and faster, bringing Harry to orgasm quicker than he thought possible. “Oh- fuck, Louis, oh!”

Harry’s legs trembled as his orgasm wracked through his body, coming hard and covering Louis’ hand and thigh with his release before the water washed it away. Harry could feel his stomach tightening with the sensation, but ignored it, focusing instead on how good Louis’ hand felt around him, and he quickly pulled Louis into a sloppy but passionate kiss, thanking him in the only way he could at that moment.

Louis smiled softly and brushed Harry’s hair back from his face, and reached for a flannel, wiping both himself and Harry down slightly as he pushed the other boy under the spray once more. Harry felt exhausted now, the tiredness that usually overtook him after sex setting in deep, and he just stood as Louis finished washing him, and then himself under the warm water. Louis got out first, wrapping a towel around his waist while he helped Harry out, clutching both hands to support the pregnant man, drying him with a fluffy towel and gentle hands. Harry could see Louis was still hard, but Louis assured him it was fine, that he’d take care of it when he got Harry to bed.

Harry wanted to protest but he knew he couldn’t. Louis held Harry’s hand as he led him into the bedroom and helped as Harry stepped into a pair of paternity boxers, the stretchy panel sitting over his ever-growing bump since Harry was finding normal boxers too uncomfortable by now. Instead of feeling embarrassed about his belly, his size and how he looked, Harry felt desired and wanted by Louis, and it was such a change for him. He allowed Louis to tuck him into bed, promising to bring him some food, but it was only a few minutes after Louis slipped out of the room that Harry fell asleep, his body sated and exhausted now from his busy day and unexpected orgasm.

He stirred awake a few hours later when Louis got into bed next to him. Harry didn't let on he was awake, instead, he stared up at Louis who had his glasses perched on the end of his nose as he read over something for work, the sheet draped over his bare legs. Harry reached up, stroking his fingertips down Louis’ chest, making his boyfriend smile down at him.

“Hey babe, sorry, did I wake you?” Louis asked, meeting Harry’s tired green eyes with his own blue ones. Neither of them had really spoken about the fact they now shared a bed every night, and neither did they feel they had to. Both men loved waking up with the other, and Harry found he slept much better in Louis’ arms.

“Nah, I think our little lady is hungry.”

“Haz, you can’t use her as an excuse, babe,” Louis teased, grinning over to Harry. “If you’re hungry, I’ll go make you something. What do you - sorry, what does she fancy eating?”

“Hmm,” Harry pondered, cheekily tapping his finger against his chin. “A cheese toastie and a cuppa?”

“Coming right up.” Louis hopped out of bed and headed towards the door before stopping, turning around and darting back to the bed. He placed one knee on the mattress as he leaned over, pressing his lips heavily against Harry’s before he pulled away again. “Anything for my love.” Harry stilled, staring as Louis retreated off down the hallway, wondering how long it would be before the words on the tip of his tongue slipped out.

*****

Harry woke the next morning, frowning when he touched the cold bed sheets next to him. He stretched out, his muscles protesting slightly as his limbs splayed out across the bed, and Harry relaxed, his hand landing on a piece of paper on Louis’ pillow. Harry carefully sat up, supporting his bump as he unfolded the paper, grinning when he saw it was Louis’ handwriting.

_ Morning beautiful, _

_ I couldn’t bring myself to wake you, you looked so gorgeous sound asleep with your hand on your bump. Have a lovely day, and I can’t wait to see you tonight _

_ Love, _

_ Your Lou xxxx _

Harry grabbed his phone and tapped out a quick text in reply to Louis before he went downstairs, ignoring the rumble of pain low in his stomach as he moved. He felt properly rested, and happier than he had in a long time. He knew he had a bit of reading for college to do today, but he grabbed some fruit salad from the fridge and headed into the sitting room, balancing the bowl on his bump as he watched morning television, something he didn't usually indulge in.

He finished the food and let his feet rest up on the coffee table, flicking through the channels. He winced as a sharp pain radiated through his tummy, rubbing gently at the sore spot, talking quietly to his bump, trying to push down his feelings of alarm.

“Hey little girl, calm down please. Don’t scare your daddy, just… take it easy, yeah?” He kept rubbing his hand in small circles, trying to concentrate on the television show in front of him. He was a little surprised Louis hadn’t replied to his message yet, but he just assumed his boyfriend was in a meeting and unable to get to his phone.

After a while, and when he felt bored, Harry wandered into the kitchen, finding himself to be much more productive when he sat at the table rather than lounging on the sofa. He opened his text book and his notebook, taking notes as he read the latest chapter on Child Development. The more he read, the more excited he was to eventually get into his career, and Harry was sure all his hard work would pay off in raising his daughter with Louis over the coming years. The thought made him smile, but his happiness was broken by a strong, sharp pain across the centre of his bump.

“Ow!” Harry cried out and grabbed at his bump, his heart thudding erratically in his chest. He was only just over 33 weeks, there was no way the baby could be coming, not yet.  He sat and caught his breath for a minute, taking in some deep breaths while he tried to calm himself down. Nothing more came for the next few minutes so Harry turned his attention back to his work. He couldn’t stop his mind mulling over the pain, and he quickly text Louis, telling him he was feeling a bit off. The text didn't tick over to read, and Harry bit his lip, hating not being able to get hold of Louis if he needed him, especially at this stage of his pregnancy..

Another pain quickly came, and this one was so strong that Harry scrunched his eyes up, trying not to cry at the tightness. He reached down and yanked up his t-shirt, alarmed to see his belly looking all taut. He started to cry because by now, he was convinced that he had gone into early labour, and he was petrified that he was all alone. As soon as the pain came, it went but was back with a vengeance just minutes later. By now, Harry was trying not to panic, fumbling with shaking hands for his iPhone from the table.

He hit Louis’ number, sobbing harder when it rang out and stopped at Louis’ voicemail. Harry hit the red button and redialled, the call again only going to Louis’ voicemail. Harry hadn’t got Louis’ work number stored in his phone, and in his panic, he couldn’t remember where he’d left the post-it note with the number written on that Louis had given him. Harry took a breath and tried to speak, leaving Louis a message, hoping he’d pick it up sooner rather than later.

“Oh god… ow, Louis, it hurts. I, I need you Lou, I think the baby is coming, my belly hurts and it’s gone hard, I’m- fuck, oww, I’m alone and I’m scared, Louis, please call me.”

He hung up as another pain wracked his belly then and Harry felt desperate, dialling the only other person he could ask for help, as much as he hated himself for it. The phone rang but Harry almost screamed with relief when the call was answered.

“Jess? I’m so sorry to- oww, oh my god, Jess, help me. My belly- the baby’s coming Jess, please help me-”


	6. 34 to 38 weeks

Harry was on his hands and knees, rocking back and forth, trying to breathe through the pain of what felt like another contraction when he heard a key in the front door before it opened, Jess calling out into the empty house.

“I’m- I’m here, Jess,” Harry called out, voice thick with fear and emotion. He was a mess, he knew it but at that moment he couldn’t care. All he was scared about was the well being of his baby, and what was happening. Jess ran into the sitting room, crouching down by Harry, rubbing his lower back, shushing him. Despite the awkwardness of their last meeting, her face was clouded in concern and she spoke softly to Harry, as if everything that had transpired between them hadn’t happened.

“Okay, darling. Tell me what’s happening.”

“Um, I- ow, fuck- I think I’m having contractions. My belly hurts, it’s all hard and Jess, it hurts so much.” Harry squeezed his eyes shut again, tears falling freely now and Jess nodded.

“Is your hospital bag upstairs?”

“We, um, Lou and I haven’t done that yet,” Harry said, cringing at his slip. Jess seemed not to react and instead she got to her feet, standing still for a moment. “Oh god, another one-” He breathed heavily, trying to pant through it.

“Okay, I’m driving you to hospital, Harry. I think you need to be checked out. Have you, um, have you called Louis?” Harry nodded, still breathing deeply through the pain. “Don’t tell me, he didn't answer. Okay, well don’t panic, I’m here, sweetheart. I’ll call his office on our way. Come on, up you get.”

Harry took her hands and got to his feet after the pain left and he stumbled slightly, Jess catching his weight as best she could. She left him stood while she darted away, Harry clinging to the arm of the sofa until she returned, Harry’s garden flip flops in her hands. He appreciated her not forcing his feet into his too-tight shoes and kept an arm around her shoulders as they walked slowly out to her car.

“You’ve got so big,” she said quietly. It may have only been a few weeks since she’d seen him, but Harry couldn’t stop noticing how she kept glancing at his bump, a pensive expression on her face. She helped Harry lower himself into the car and drove off, using her in-car system to call Louis’ office, Harry clutching his belly again as yet another pain surged through him.

“Yeah, hi Pam, it’s Jess. Um, is Louis about, please?” she paused for a minute, listening to the other lady on the other side on her ear piece. “Okay, well, can you get him please and pass on a message for me? Shit, sorry Harry-” she cursed as she had to brake suddenly thanks to a car pulling out in front of her, turning the corner to take another route to hospital. “Sorry Pam, yeah, could you tell Lou that his, um, his partner is with me and we’re heading to hospital? Harry thinks he might be having the baby. Okay, thanks love, bye.”

Harry’s eyes remained in his lap, his jaw clenched at both the pain and Jess having to refer to him as Louis’ partner, despite the fact she was his wife. Jess clearly sensed something was amiss as she reached out and took Harry’s hand, squeezing gently to reassure him. “It’s fine, Harry. We’ll talk about it later if you want, but for now, focus on your breathing. We’re nearly there.” He nodded, a lump in his throat stopping him from speaking.

They arrived and Jess flung her car into the nearest parking space, paying for it using the app on her phone before she helped Harry out, shuffling along with him as he breathed through another pain. She knew where she was going and they stopped outside the doors of the maternity and paternity ward, where Harry and Louis were due to tour in a few weeks time before he gave birth. She explained to the lady behind the desk about what had happened and they were quickly led through to a side room. A midwife that Harry hadn’t met before bustled in, strapping his belly up with various sensors and monitors, and Harry didn't let go of Jess’ hand, fear paralysing him by now.

He tuned out as the midwife spoke to Jess, his hands touching his bare belly wherever he could, careful not dislodge any of the monitors that had been placed on him. Things felt a little surreal, like they weren’t happening, and Harry panicked when Jess pulled away, patting his hand. He grabbed out, eyes widening, tears beginning to fall again as he realised she was leaving.

“Harry, love, come on, calm down. I’m not leaving, the doctor just wants to examine you and talk to you. I should probably go and call Louis again, see where he is. If you need me, just call out, okay?” He nodded and swallowed, smiling at the young male doctor who came into the room just as he left.

“Hello Harry, I’m Dr Matthews. How are you?”

“Not good,” Harry admitted, still tearful and sore. “I, um, I’m only 33 weeks and I’m having contractions. Uh, it’s too early for me to have my baby, why is this happening?”

“Okay, Harry, please don’t panic. Let me take a look at your readings, and we’ll go from there. Do you know what your due date is, and what you’re having?”

Harry knew the questions were just to provide a distraction, but he smiled at the thought, answering clearly. “Yeah, we’re having a girl, and she’s due on September 10th.” The doctor smiled, poring over the strip of paper streaming out of the machine, nodding and circling a couple of things before he came back over.

“I’m just going to feel your tummy for a moment, Harry, is that okay?” Harry nodded, and winced as the doctor pressed his fingers into Harry’s flesh. The baby kicked then and Harry almost cried with relief, laughing at the sudden sensation. “Ah, there she is. Happy and healthy in there, Harry, no need to worry immediately. I have a few questions. First of all, is the baby’s father on his way?”

Harry nodded, not bothering to explain anything more than he had to. “Yeah, my boyfriend Louis is on his way. He was at work, I couldn’t get hold of him-” His breath shuddered for a moment as he realised how much he needed Louis, and he could only hope he was on his way.

“Okay, well, the friend who brought you in seems very nice. Just a few more questions, Harry, then I will sort you out with some pain relief. Have you been sexually active lately?”

Harry flushed at the question but nodded shyly, the doctor clearly waiting for more information. Harry sighed, realising he was going to have to give more detail than he was comfortable with. “Um, we haven’t had penetrative sex but, um, I did, uh, orgasm last night, quite strongly? I felt a bit unsettled after that, my bump ached for quite a while.”

“Perfectly normal,” the doctor said, entirely unphased by Harry’s admission. “When you orgasm, your muscles contract, and it probably sent signals to your body which were quite confusing. It’s perfectly safe to engage in sexual activity while you’re pregnant, but just be away that anything too, um, vigorous could send you into labour?”

“So I can’t have sex until the baby is born?” Harry felt a little shocked at his bold question, but faced the doctor, knowing both men were fully grown adults and could discuss sex.

“You certainly can. You and your boyfriend just need to be careful and aware of your bump, and your limitations. I have to say Harry, I believe these to be Braxton Hicks contractions brought on by the sexual activity of last night. It’s your body preparing for birth. There are no signs that your body is in labour, your readings are normal. I’d like to keep you in here for a few more hours, but if things subside soon, which I believe they will, you’ll be free to go home. I’ll get you some pain relief and let your friend back in.”

“Thank you so much,” Harry said softly as the doctor left the room. Jess came back in moments later, sitting on the brown plastic chair at the side of the bed. Harry reached for her hand, and he loved her for the fact she didn't hesitate in taking it. “Hey, um, thank you, for being here.”

“Of course, Harry. Is everything okay?” Harry nodded, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. They sat quietly as a nurse came in, inserting an IV into Harry’s arm quickly and pushing some medicine through it before she left, pulling the door closed behind her.

“Yeah, the doctor thinks it’s Braxton Hicks contractions.” Jess nodded knowingly, and Harry felt pleased he didn’t have to explain much more. “Apparently, it’s normal and they’ll go soon. I feel a bit stupid now, thinking the baby was coming, I don’t know-”

“Not stupid Harry, I’d have been the same. You didn't know, and that’s what the doctors and midwives are for. So she’s okay in there?”

“Yeah,” Harry said, rubbing his belly slightly with his free hand. “I wasn’t ready for her yet. I’ve still got just over six weeks to go, so she has to stay put. Um, how have you been? Everything okay at your Mum’s?”

“It is. I mean, it’s not ideal but I’m looking for my own place at the moment. I’m actually seeing a flat tonight, so fingers crossed it’ll be nice and I’ll want to move in. I hate my mum treating me like a kid again, I miss my own space, and-” She cut off as the door flew open and a panting Louis ran into the room, almost tripping as he dashed over to Harry’s bedside.

“Oh my darling, are you okay? Fuck, I was so scared- is our little girl okay?” Harry could see tears in Louis’ eyes, and that made him emotional again, letting Louis kiss him despite the presence of Jess next to them both. “Harry, baby, tell me it’s okay, please-”

“Lou, we’re okay, both of us. It’s Braxton Hicks, practice contractions. She’s fine in there, and so am I. I just- I panicked, I’m sorry that I scared you.” Harry felt stunned as Louis burst into tears, dropping his head to Harry’s shoulder as he cried for a few minutes, one hand on Harry’s belly, his thumb moving back and forth. “Oh Lou, don’t cry, love.”

Jess coughed quietly then, and both men looked up, a little embarrassed to have been in such an emotional situation together in front of her. “I’m, um, I’m going to go, now Lou is here. Take care, Harry.” Louis straightened up and wiped his eyes before rounding the bed and hugging his ex-wife tightly for a moment.

“Thank you, for being there for Harry when I couldn’t be. I just… you’re an amazing person, Jess.” He kissed her cheek, and she squeezed his arm gently, smiling fondly at Harry.

“It’s fine, Louis. Despite everything, I want Harry and the baby to be okay. If you need anything, just call, okay? See you both soon.” She leaned in and hugged Harry quickly, smiling before she left and shut the door behind her, leaving Louis and Harry alone for the first time since everything. Louis frowned down at the monitors still strapped around Harry’s vast belly, leaning in to kiss the skin between the straps.

“Seriously, love, you’re okay?”

“I am, I promise, Lou. Don’t cry again, if you do, I’ll cry.” They both chuckled at that and Louis sat down in the chair next to the bed, holding Harry’s hand again. Harry felt a sense of relief wash over him now that Louis was with him, and he laid back against the pillow.

“I was so scared, Haz. I really thought that something wrong, that you or our little girl were hurt, or that I was going to miss her being born or something. I just… fuck. I love you, Harry. I realised it as I ran here, I’ve never been so scared to lose something in my whole life. I love you, and I love our little girl so much.” Louis let out a shaky breath and bowed his head, resting it on Harry’s thigh, Harry’s long fingers moving through Louis’ sweaty hair now. Harry’s heart was racing at Louis finally saying those words to him, and he grinned at his boyfriend, a red flush on both o their cheeks.

“I love you, too,” he said softly, Louis’ head flying up, their eyes meeting. “You were all I wanted, you know. I was scared and I wanted you here so much. I love you, Louis.” Louis’ eyes were shining with tears and he surged up, kissing Harry’s lips heavily, both men putting everything into the kiss, Harry’s hands coming up to cradle Louis’ cheeks.

“Oh, I’m sorry-” they broke apart, blushing as the doctor interrupted them, Louis standing up to introduce himself.

“Sorry about that, uh, I’m Louis Tomlinson. I’m Harry’s boyfriend, and the baby’s dad.” Harry couldn’t wipe the grin off his face at that, and he and Louis shared a secret smile as the doctor stepped back over, eyes raking over the readings again.

“Not to worry, it’s a stressful situation, pleased you made it though. Harry’s been missing you.”

“Not as much as I missed him,” Louis quipped back, sitting down next to Harry again. “So is everything okay with our daughter, doctor?”

“Most certainly. The medicine we have given Harry has eased his pain and slowed the contractions, and I’m certain in a few hours time he’ll be fine and ready for you to take home.”

“That’s good to hear, thank you so much,” Louis said, grinning to Harry. “All I want is a healthy boyfriend and a healthy daughter.”

“I’ll make sure you have both,” the doctor said with a smile. “I’ll leave you both to it, but don’t hesitate to buzz if you need anything.” He left the room again, Harry and Louis alone once more.

“Will do.” Harry tapped the bed next to him and shuffled over, making room for Louis to sit next to him. Louis’ arm came around his shoulder and Harry snuggled into Louis’ chest as best he could, taking care of the straps around his tummy still. “I’m so glad you’re here, Lou.”

“Nowhere I would ever rather be, darling,” Louis said, kissing Harry’s forehead, holding him close. “I love you so much, both of you.”

“We love you too,” Harry said, exhaustion taking over now, his eyes fluttering shut despite his best attempts to stay awake. “Sorry, Lou, I’m so tired…”

“Sleep, baby. I’m not going anywhere.” He stroked Harry’s hair as his boyfriend fell asleep against him, Harry’s warm breaths ghosting over his chest. “I’ll always be right here, I promise. I love you.”

*****

A few days later, Harry had been back from hospital and was bored stiff. Louis wouldn’t allow him to do anything around the home, not even make a cup of tea for himself, and Harry was about ready to climb the walls. He’d woken up before Louis that morning and had relished in an hour to himself downstairs before Louis had sprinted downstairs in just his boxers to check on him. As much as the sight pleased Harry, he rolled his eyes, pushing Louis away as he tried to hug him.

“Lou, please. I’m going mad in here. I’ve had an idea, if you aren’t going in to work again...”

“I’m not,” Louis said, shaking his head. “I’m going back on Monday, but they gave me this week off to take care of you.”

“And you’re doing a wonderful job, but seriously, I need to breathe, love. I wondered if we could make a start on the nursery? When I thought she was coming the other day, I realised we had nothing ready, not my hospital bag, or anything. Can we do that, pretty please?” He pouted and batted his lashes at Louis, making his boyfriend laugh and nod, wrapping his arms around Harry.

“Alright then, that sounds fair enough. But no heavy lifting, and you need to let me do anything strenuous. You can, I dunno, read me the instructions or something.”

“Oh wow, calm down Louis,” Harry teased, kissing Louis’ lips quickly. “I’m fine, okay? And so is our little girl. Let me help, please?” Louis sighed and folded his arms across his chest, staring at Harry for a moment before he moved closer, pressing his palms against Harry’s bump. “I know you just worry but I’m going stir crazy here.”

“Okay, fine.” Louis kissed Harry’s lips softly and rubbed his nose against Harry’s for a short second. “Let’s do your hospital bag first, yeah?” Harry nodded and they held hands as they moved upstairs. Just before they went into Harry’s room, he stilled, eyes widening.

“Um, Lou, I, uh, I don’t have a bag big enough for all the stuff. Can we, uh, go out and get one?” Louis tutted and shook his head, dragging Harry into his bedroom. Harry was nervous but he felt relieved when he sensed it was very much a male-only zone now, only Louis’ things littered about, and when he opened the wardrobe, only Louis’ clothes hung inside. It was as if Jess had never been there, which also felt slightly odd.

“Don’t be so daft. I’ve got loads of bags, I’m sure we have something to use rather than waste your money.” Louis rifled through and threw a few onto the bed, letting Harry take his pick. He held up a dark green sports holdall with a smile and Louis nodded, following Harry back into his own room. “So, you know what we need or are we winging it?”

“Um, I found a list online,” Harry began, grabbing his phone and pulling up the screenshot he’d taken the other evening. “Okay, onesies and vests for the baby, nappies, dummies, blanket and a hat. Then for me, changes of clothes, headscarf, toiletries, um...” he flushed at the next thing but ploughed on, knowing Louis would have to either get silly over it or accept it. “...uh, pads…”

“No worries, we can go shopping and make sure we get all that,” Louis said with a smile, watching as Harry moved over to his chest of drawers, crouching awkwardly and pulling open the bottom drawer. “What are you… oh my god, Harry…” Harry turned around and grinned at Louis as he pulled out a few baby clothes he’d been storing away, a few things he hadn’t been able to resist when he’d been shopping.

There was a beautiful pink baby-gro covered in roses, a packet of pale pink vests, a soft white hat, and a packet of tiny nappies. Harry watched as Louis picked up a little ‘The apple of Daddy’s eye’ baby-gro, holding it up in front of him, a wide grin on his face. “You okay, Lou?”

“She’s going to be here and she’ll fit in this soon,” Louis mused, reaching for Harry’s hand. “I can’t believe we’re gonna be dads soon. Wow. She’s… she’s going to be perfect, Haz.” Harry shook out another bag, showing Louis the other bits and pieces he’d bought, a couple of lilac dummies, and a gorgeous woollen blanket he’d spent far too much on. “So, what do I get to buy my daughter then?” Louis teased, nudging Harry with his elbow.

“Everything else?” Harry said with a laugh, watching as Louis started to put a few items into the bag. “Babe, I want to wash the clothes before we put her in them, and we need to get my bits from Tesco at some point.” He frowned at the thought of Louis buying him personal items, but he decided to bring up the thing that had been on his mind for a while. “Lou… do you want to be there?”

“Where?” Louis asked, putting the bag down by Harry’s wardrobe and folding up a couple of baby clothes.

“At the birth,” Harry said softly,  crossing his legs at the ankles, relaxing back on his bed. “I’ve been reading some stuff and I think I’d like to try a water birth? It’s meant to be relaxing, and, um, your partner can get in the water too, if you want I mean-”

“I’d love to, of course I want to be there,” Louis returned, grinning at Harry. “I want to support you and I want to see our daughter come into the world. And before you say it, I know birth isn’t pretty but I don’t care. I’m… I’m all in this, Haz. I want to be there as much as you want me to.”

“I want you there for everything,” Harry whispered, letting Louis cuddle up to him. “I’m scared, I know it’s gonna hurt but… it’ll be worth it, to hold our baby girl at the end of it.”

“Only six weeks to go,” Louis mused, stroking Harry’s belly under his shirt. “Six weeks until we’re Daddy and Papa.” He turned his head to kiss Harry, their hands linking under Harry’s bump. “I love you, Harry.”

“I love you too, Lou. I’m so glad I’m doing this with you. Nobody else I’d want to raise my baby with and, er, share my life with.”

“Me neither, love,” Louis whispered. “Me neither.”

*****

A week later, a tired but content thirty-five weeks pregnant Harry and Louis stumbled out of the building where they’d spent an hour for their first antenatal class. The whole thing had been a lot of fun, and they’d enjoyed meeting new parents-to-be, hearing about their lives and different journeys to parenthood. Harry and Louis hadn’t confessed too much, had allowed them to believe Louis was the biological father of Harry’s baby, as Harry had asked that of Louis beforehand, and of course, Louis was happy to go alone with whatever his boyfriend wanted.

They’d asked lots of questions, Harry more set than ever on a water birth after one of the mums there who was on her third baby swore she’d never do anything else. The midwife who was leading the class explained what happened in a water birth, and both Louis and Harry were more keen than ever. Louis reached for Harry’s hand as they headed for the supermarket down the road to buy some food before they headed home.

“Well, that was really good,” Louis chatted as they walked down the street, meeting eyes with a few people who gave him and Harry fond smiles, eyeing his boyfriend’s huge bump. Harry seemed to have grown again over the past week, and Louis couldn’t help but feel more turned on every time he looked at Harry. Harry simply glowed with his pregnancy, his hair was shiny and thick, his eyes sparkled with pure joy despite his constant tiredness, and his body was swollen perfectly as he grew their daughter. Louis had had to hold back over the past few nights, knowing he was desperate to take things further but was waiting for the okay from Harry.

“It was nice to chat to other pregnant people,” Harry admitted, watching as Louis slotted the coin into the trolley, pulling it from the line and heading into the shop with Harry. “I mean, I love talking to you about the baby and stuff but you don’t know how things feel and stuff, and those other men and women did.”

“I can imagine, love,” Louis mused, picking up a few bits of fruit and putting them in the trolley as Harry wandered off to the meat counter, selecting a few things he could cook for himself and Louis over the next few days. Louis couldn’t stop smiling as Harry all but waddled now, a hand on his lower back, and he had a serene look about him. Louis felt ridiculously in love, and they kept on shopping, filling the trolley with a good combination of healthy food and naughty but nice snacks for Louis.

They arrived at the baby aisle, and Harry grabbed a few more packs of nappies and wipes, a tin of formula and started towards the section for parents. He pondered over a few things before he dropped a packet of pads into the trolley, and Louis’ heart fell as he saw Harry try to hide them, clearly bothered by his purchase. He let go of the handle of the trolley and stepped over, looping an arm around Harry’s waist.

“Hey. You know you don’t have to hide anything from me, babe? All of this… it’s okay. I’m not bothered if you need pads or whatever. It’s just part of you having our baby. Don’t think I’m going to be turned off or something sweetheart, that could never happen, not when I’ve got you as my boyfriend.”

“Fuck,” Harry muttered, biting on his lip until Louis gently pulled it free. “I just… what did I do to deserve you? I love you, Louis.” He leaned in and kissed Louis softly, the pair jumping apart at the sound of a sigh behind them. “Sorry, are we in the way-”

“No, no. You two are a beautiful couple. When are you due?” The lady behind them smiled and Louis felt proud, holding Harry close to his body.

“Um, our little girl is due in just over a month,” Harry said, cheeks flushing, and Louis just smiled on serenely, feeling happier than ever as he listened to Harry converse with the woman, only stopping his conversation when his phone rang, frowning when he saw the number. Louis ended the conversation and gave Harry a bit of space, trying not to listen, but he spotted the look of pure delight on Harry’s features, the words of gratitude pouring from Harry’s lips as his grin widened even more. Harry ended the call and walked as fast as he could to Louis, grabbing his boyfriend’s hips.

Louis waited with anticipation, eager to hear whatever news Harry had to share with him, but he frowned when Harry laughed and pulled away, dragging Louis and the trolley along to the checkout. He loaded everything onto the conveyor belt, leaving Louis puzzled as he helped pack the bags and paid for the shopping, Harry dancing about on his feet, clearly getting a second wind after his exhaustion of earlier. They walked out to the car, Louis loading the bags while Harry got into the car, and soon, Louis joined him, driving home.

“I’ll tell you when we get in,” Harry promised, knowing Louis was desperate to hear his news. Louis, for his part, just held Harry’s hand all the way home, wondering what on earth Harry could have to divulge that would put him in such a good mood. When they arrived home, they worked together to put the food away into the cupboards and fridge, Harry setting his baby of baby items on the bottom stair, ready to take upstairs with him later on. They were the last few bits for his baby bag, and now things were coming together, Louis felt a sense of peace inside.

“So?” Louis looked up, unable to hold his impatience in any longer. “Please tell me, Haz…”

“How badly do you wanna know?” Harry teased, the hem of his t-shirt riding up as he stretched his arms above his head, cracking his back and exposing his belly. He tried to tug it down but when he failed, he just yanked it off over his head, letting it fall to the floor. Louis loved how comfortable Harry was around him now, and his eyes raked over Harry’s torso, eyes flashing at the expanse of skin exposed to him. “Lou, put your tongue away.”

“Sorry, you’re, uh, just really fucking hot like this,” Louis admitted, eyes darkening as Harry walked over, straddling him where Louis sat on the sofa. Harry’s bump sat between them, but Louis still planted his hands on Harry’s hips, loving how curvy Harry was now he was so heavily pregnant. “Tell me, Harry…”

“Okay, so you know my college course?” Louis nodded, trying not to moan as Harry’s fingers slid around his neck, tugging the longish hairs at the back of his head. “Well, I’ve been doing quite well. Like, really well, actually. Every year they have a special program for students that are excelling, it helps career progression and offers better opportunities for those wanting to work in childcare. There’s only, like, two places given out each year, and, uh…” He flushed and Louis gasped, realising what Harry was saying.

“You didn't,” he muttered, grinning as Harry bit his lip and nodded, a huge smile broadening on his face. “Oh my fucking god, Haz…”

“And even better… they obviously know I’m pregnant so they’re willing to defer it until our daughter is six months old and I’ll be in a place to go back to college. They said they wouldn’t normally do it, put it off for someone, but in my case, they were willing to make an exception. I just… I can’t believe it, Lou.”

“I can. You’re fucking amazing, Haz,” Louis said, tugging Harry towards him until their lips met in the middle, colliding heavily. Louis wasted no time in deepening the kiss, moaning as Harry started to roll his hips down, pushing Louis’ lower half into the sofa. Louis’ body was already responding to being so close to a half naked Harry, and seeing the sheer pride and happiness on his boyfriend’s face was doing other things to Louis as well. He threaded his fingers through Harry’s long curls, and tilted Harry’s head, massaging Harry’s tongue with his own for a moment until Harry sat up. Louis was surprised to see Harry’s pupils were already blown, and he was red-cheeked, still moving his body gently on Louis’, smirking slightly as he felt Louis’ erection against his leg. “Shit-”

“Take me to bed, Lou,” Harry said, his voice low and full of desire.

“Damn, are you that tired? Really?” Louis whined, but Harry put a hand over his mouth, staring deep into Louis’ eyes, and Louis stilled, sensing something was about to change between them. “Harry-”

“Take me to bed and fuck me, Louis.” Louis’ breath caught in his throat at Harry’s blunt statement but he just nodded, watching as Harry carefully got up from Louis’ lap, holding his hand behind his back as he led the way up the stairs and into his bedroom. The air was thick between them, and Louis was struggling to keep his body under control. He’d been desperate to have sex with Harry for weeks now, and now the time was finally here, he felt like he might actually explode with the anticipation. He watched as Harry went to push off his shorts but Louis grabbed his wrist, stopping him.

“Let me?” Louis asked, and Harry nodded, cheeks slightly red now. Instead of diving straight in, Louis gently pushed Harry back towards the bed, watching with hungry eyes as his boyfriend laid out for him, staring up at him with such love Louis’ heart felt more than full. “Harry, you’re so beautiful. I’m so in love with you, baby.” Harry just smiled up and Louis knelt next to him on the mattress, pushing a curl behind Harry’s ear. He kissed where Harry’s dimple was carved into his cheek, loving the slight sting of stubble on his lips as he kissed along Harry’s jaw.

He then kissed down Harry’s neck, the younger man writhing underneath him as they both got more and more turned on from the slight touches, knowing what was to come. “I love your shoulders,” Louis muttered. “They’re so broad, baby. I love when you hug me and your long arms wrap right around me, even with your bump between us. Your gorgeous, soft hands… amazing fingers, fuck, I love those fingers inside me so much.” Harry giggled at that, and Louis let his hand gently drop back to the mattress, working Harry’s shorts down his hips and thighs, leaving Harry in a pair of bright red paternity boxers.

“This chest… your sensitive nipples… fuck. I love kissing them, and falling asleep on your soft skin instead of my pillow.” Louis kept kissing further down, nuzzling his nose into the top of Harry’s bump before he pressed a kiss onto Harry’s popped belly button. “This… this is my favourite bit of you. This fucking amazing bump, the home for our little girl. I love when I can feel her move inside you, I love rubbing your body butter into your belly, I love how big you are, fuck, it turns me on so much, baby.” Harry reached down to touch his cock but sighed in frustration when he couldn’t reach properly, protruding bump in the way.

“Hey, patience, I’m getting there,” Louis said, pulling Harry’s shorts off entirely now. He also took Harry’s boxers off, leaving him naked on the bed, just how Louis loved him best. Louis kissed down the front of each of Harry’s strong thighs before he pushed his legs open slightly, enough to kiss the soft skin of his inner thigh, making Harry moan. “Your thighs… jesus. I’ve always thought I was an eyes and smile man but Harry… your thighs made me realise what I’ve been missing out on. I love coming on them, I love rubbing off against them… and when you’re not pregnant anymore, we’re going to have so much fun with me fucking your thighs, yeah?” Harry whimpered and nodded, bucking his hips. Louis trailed his lips up along the crease where Harry’s thigh met his hips, and he grazed his lips against Harry’s soft shaft. “And this… well. I’m so lucky only I get this bit. You have a beautiful, big cock and I love it, just like I love you.”

“Louis, please- need you inside, baby,” Harry begged, fisting the sheets beneath his body, watching on as Louis stood up, yanking his clothes off with no finesse whatsoever, but neither of them cared. Louis ran out of the room, fumbling in his bedside table for the lube and a condom before he returned to Harry, dropping both items on the mattress next to his boyfriend.

“You sure about this?” Louis asked, not wanting Harry to feel pressured into doing anything. Harry just nodded and parted his legs. It wasn’t the first time Louis had fingered Harry, it was something they both enjoyed quite often, Louis enjoying Harry doing it to him as well, but doing it for the purpose of preparing Harry for Louis’ cock felt different. Harry’s bump was too big for Louis to comfortably reach and kiss him, so instead, he sucked Harry’s cock between his lips, his other hand pulling on Harry’s already sensitive nipples. 

He slowly worked his fingers in and out of Harry’s body, enjoying the noises that was emotting, only prompting Louis to tease him ever more. He ran his tongue around the dripping head of Harry’s cock, Harry thrashing around at the sensation, fighting back the urge to fuck up into Louis’ mouth. Louis popped off for a second, licking his lips as he raised himself up high enough to lock eyes on Harry, loving how much of a dishevelled mess he was. He bobbed back down and pressed against Harry’s prostate, making him whimper once more.

“Lou, I’m ready, please-” Harry pleaded, bringing his hands up to tug at Louis’ hair, frustrated that he couldn’t have the pleasure of seeing Louis suck him off as Louis got to see whenever the urge to get Louis in his mouth overtook Harry. Louis sat up, licking his hips as he reached over to pick up his discarded t-shirt, cleaning his fingers on it before he threw it back on the floor.

“How do you want to do this?” Louis was keen to make this as comfortable for Harry as possible, and sat back on his haunches, stroking himself as he looked down on his boyfriend’s beautiful, swollen body. Harry propped himself up on his elbows, thinking it through before he locked eyes with Louis.

“Um, I think on my side? If that’s okay? My bump is too big to be on my back for too long, and I don’t think I could hold myself up on my arms for long-”

“That’s fine, baby,” Louis reassured him, helping Harry roll himself over. He grabbed a spare pillow which Harry pushed under his bump, supporting himself before Louis slotted in behind him. “Um, do you want me to use a condom, love?” Harry peered back over his shoulder and shook his head shyly, Louis hurrying to grab his hand and reassure him that it was fine, that he didn't mind either way. “I’m clean, baby, I promise.”

He laid back down and helped Harry lift his thigh so Louis could line himself up. Louis slid his left arm under Harry’s neck, letting Harry grab his hand as their bodies moulded together at last, coming together in the way they’d both been craving in so long. It didn't matter that Harry was pregnant, that this was a bit clumsy for their first time… to Louis, it was perfect, and everything he wanted.

Louis eased himself inside Harry’s body gently, letting Harry breathe through the stretch, Louis stroking up and down the curve of Harry’s waist and he rolled his hips forwards, bottoming out eventually. “Oh, Harry, you feel so good, baby-” Louis murmured, keeping still as he waited for the go ahead from Harry to move. It felt amazing to finally be inside of his boy, and he pressed soft kisses up and down the back of Harry’s neck, loving the shivers that followed his lips.

“Lou… please move,” Harry breathed out, his bum pushing backwards against Louis’ hips. “I feel so full, oh god-” Louis started to rock back and forth gently, his cock sliding gently in and out of Harry as they moved together. Harry wasn’t shy in taking what he wanted, pushing Louis’ hand towards his nipples, encouraging his boyfriend to tweak and play with them, Harry moaning in pleasure at the sparks erupting throughout his body. “Louis, you can- fuck, oh god, you can go harder…”

Louis nodded and supported himself behind Harry, holding his hand tighter as he started to put more effort into his thrusts, little noises coming out of Harry with each glide of Louis’ cock deep inside him. Louis shut his eyes, certain that if he looked down at Harry’s body, he’d come all too soon, and he wanted this to be as perfect for the pair of them as it could be. “So perfect Harry, love you, love being inside you baby…”

Louis couldn’t resist running his other hand over Harry’s bump, stroking the swell of Harry’s body as he moved inside him, thoughts of perhaps filling Harry up again with his baby one day flooding his mind, and Louis quickly pushed them aside. This baby, their little girl, was enough for now, although Louis was hoping Harry wouldn’t want to stop at one pregnancy. Harry’s body suited it so much, his wide hips easily supported his bump, and his tattoos looked simply perfect stretched along his skin.

Now used to the stretch, Harry started to move his body with the movement of Louis’, pushing back into each thrust, trying to get a better angle, wanting Louis to hit his prostate now. He mumbled in frustration as the position didn't quite allow Louis to get deep enough, and Louis could sense his annoyance, playing with Harry’s nipples to try and calm him down a bit, both bodies sweaty now as they rubbed together.

“Fuck, Lou-” Harry panted out, craning his head back to look at Louis. “Louis, can we, shit, I need-”

“Tell me, Harry, anything you need,” Louis said, rocking his hips gently by now. “I’ll do it, love, whatever you want.”

“Need more, want you deeper-” Harry stuttered out, wriggling away from Louis. Louis allowed himself to slip out of Harry and watched in confusion as Harry maneuvered himself onto his hands and knees again, bump hanging low to the mattress. Harry had never looked more perfect in Louis’ eyes. His cheeks were flushed, his hair was a mess, and he was looking at Louis like he was everything. “Want you like this, can we…?” Harry trailed off, Louis hurrying to nod, wanting Harry to know that was fine.

“Yeah, of course, you sure you can…?”

“Yeah, just- please Louis.” Louis wasted no time in getting onto his knees behind Harry, lining up before pushing back inside, Harry’s waiting body accepting him easily. Harry moaned out as Louis bottomed out once more, and straight away, Louis could tell this position was doing it for Harry. However, he was aware Harry couldn’t sustain this for too long, and he set a brutal pace, fucking into Harry hard and fast, his boyfriend muttering his name over and over, sending shivers throughout Louis’ body. He could feel the bubble of his orgasm in his belly, and reached for Harry’s hard cock, stroking quickly. “Lou, I’m close- wanna come-”

“Come for me, you can come, baby,” Louis mumbled, focusing now on his own impending orgasm too. He kept his hand moving, their bodies rocking back and forth together, and Louis came before he knew what was happening, his whines becoming increasingly high pitched as his come spilled inside Harry. He screwed his eyes up and pounding roughly into Harry, calling out his name, one hand sliding to support his bump as the other worked over his boyfriend, trying to draw his orgasm out of him.

“Oh fuck - Louis, shit!” Harry cried out as he came hard, covering the lower part of his belly and the bed sheet, and Louis could see his arms trembling with the exertion of holding himself upright. Louis quickly pulled out, wincing at the sensitivity of his cock but he took Harry’s hips in his hands, helping him roll onto his side, away from the pool of come and off his belly, making sure he was comfortable before he stood up.

Harry’s eyes fluttered shut, a small smile on his lips as he started to come down from what they had done, one hand resting loosely on his belly. “Oh god, Louis… you are so good, so good for me. Made me feel so good. You don’t know…” His voice faded away as a smile appeared again, Harry sighing in complete and utter contentment.

“Lemme get something to clean us up, then I’ll cuddle you,” Louis muttered softly, pecking Harry’s lips before he stood up, stretching his muscles, feeling sated himself now. It had been so long since he had sex, but it had been more than worth the wait. He left Harry’s room and grabbed a clean sheet from the linen closet before stepping into the bathroom and dampening down a flannel. He turned off the hallway light as he went back into Harry’s room,  _ their _ room, he reminded himself with a small smile, and paused in the doorway, looking at his boyfriend with fond eyes.

Harry was asleep, already. He was completely naked and seemingly uncaring about it, curled up on his side, hair splayed behind on the pillow. Louis wished he could remember this moment forever, how Harry glowed with pregnancy and their first time. He gently wiped Harry down, leaving to grab a small towel and putting it over the damp patch on the sheet before he climbed into bed behind Harry, spooning him. Harry might have been physically bigger than Louis but he loved to be held as he slept, and Louis loved holding him. It was small things like that which made Louis realise they were made for each other.

“I love you so much,” Louis whispered, leaning in to kiss Harry’s cheek before he reached backwards and flicked off the bedside light. “You’re my world, you and our little girl.” He closed his eyes, Harry’s fingers seeking Louis’ out even in sleep, and they fell asleep, wrapped up in each other, and their love.

*****

The following morning, Harry woke up needing the loo, as he did most mornings thanks to the baby girl sat nicely on his bladder. However, what got his attention wasn’t his desperate urge to pee. It was the whispered words he could hear coming through the dimly lit room, and he didn't move, scared to stop Louis from what he was saying. Harry turned his head ever so slightly, so he could hear better, and smiled to himself as Louis’ words rang out more clearly.

“...mean the world to me already. I never thought I could love someone so much who I hadn’t met yet, but I do. I love you so much, you’re part of your Daddy and that makes you so special, because he’s so special to me.” Louis pressed a soft kiss to Harry’s bump, his fingertips trailing after it. “I can’t wait to meet you and hold you, and take care of you until you’re a big girl. But for now, you can just stay little.” Louis kissed his belly again, and Harry struggled to hold back a giggle, Louis’ scruff tickling his sensitive skin. What Louis said next, though, made Harry bite his lip, holding back his tears. “My little Tomlinson princess.”

“Oh Lou…” Harry couldn’t stop himself from speaking, and Louis blinked up from where he was laid out on his belly, talking directly to Harry’s bump. “You… Tomlinson?”

“Well, uh, I guess that’s how I’ve been thinking of her. But if you want her to be like Tomlinson-Styles, or just Styles, that’s okay too. Whatever you want, Harry.”

“No, I like Tomlinson. I want her to be a Tomlinson,” he said softly, suddenly feeling overcome with emotion. “I love your name. I mean… maybe one day…” He smiled, shyness taking over, his eyes dipping back to the mattress. Louis moved until he was sat on his knees, and he tucked his fingers under Harry’s chin, bringing their faces together.

“Maybe what, love?”

“Maybe I’ll, um, have the same name too, one day? Like, not now, but… in the future?” Louis just stared for a moment and Harry panicked, wondering if he’d said the wrong thing. “Or not, I don’t-”

“I’d love that. You to have our name, too. Just… whenever you’re ready, yeah? I would.. I’m honoured you want our little girl to have my name, Haz. Fuck, that means so much to me. I love you.” He bent down and captured Harry’s lips in a forceful kiss, entirely overwhelmed. “God, you’re the gift that just keeps on giving, aren’t you?”

Harry cackled loudly at that before he moaned, the urge to get to the toilet more desperate than ever. “I hate to break this up but if I don’t get to the loo, we might be indulging in something neither of us is ready for..” Harry teased, watching as Louis hopped over him and onto the floor, helping Harry up and kissing him before he let Harry escape to the bathroom. He returned to the bedroom a few minutes later to see Louis in the process of changing the sheets, wearing some boxers while Harry was still naked.

Feeling shy, Harry reached down, cupping himself as Louis finished up, chucking the dirty sheet into the hallway. As he walked by Harry, he removed his hands, bringing them to his lips and kissing them in turn. “You don’t have to cover up any part of you,” Louis whispered, kissing along Harry’s neck and shoulders, making him shiver. “You’re perfect.”

“So are you,” Harry mumbled back, dropping his head back so Louis had easier access to his neck. “Can we go back to bed? It’s early and I’m tired. Do you have work today?”

“Later,” Louis nodded, guiding Harry to go the bed. Harry knew Louis was watching him as he curled up into position, but instead of Louis slotting in behind him, he laid opposite him, reaching down for Harry’s hand. Harry felt happy and comfortable as he fell asleep again, giving his body the rest it needed, safe and secure with Louis, in their home.

*****

The next few days passed by in a blur. Harry was finishing up college now, turning in his last few papers before he finished. The professors were still happy for him to finish the final modules after the baby was born, and Harry was more than relieved with that. He was finding it difficult to be out all day, his body just exhausted, and he found himself crying a few evenings, his back and legs so sore. Louis ended up putting his foot down, telling Harry any other pregnant person would be on maternity or paternity leave by now, and that at almost thirty seven weeks pregnant, he had to rest.

Harry listened, despite the fact he hated feeling like a burden, and the first few days he spent at home doing nothing were blissful. All he did was wash the babies clothes, hang them on the line, and get emotional at the sight of the colourful but tiny items blowing in the wind. It seemed almost unbelievable that in just a few short weeks, there would be a baby in their house that would fit into these tiny clothes, and he, Louis and their daughter would be a family - an unconventional one, but a family nonetheless.

The nursery was fully finished now, too. Harry had nagged Louis until he’d built the white wooden cot they’d bought together, as well as the other furniture items, and Harry had set about making it their daughter’s bedroom while Louis worked, putting her nappies, creams and other necessities in the drawer unit, and putting her clothes into the chest of drawers. He’d made up her bed with soft pink and lilac sheets, and now all they needed was the baby herself to finish it off perfectly. He’d even bought some canvases to go on the walls, and had managed to get those up on the walls himself. He’d cried when he’d added the finishing touches, and Louis had come from work in alarm to see Harry sobbing in the middle of the room, entirely overwhelmed. Since then, emotional Harry had been a staple in the house, and the nearer to forty weeks Harry got, the more tears seemed to fall.

They had also agreed that the baby would be sleeping with them in their bedroom for the first weeks, at least until they were all settled in. Louis’ mum had bought them a new Moses Basket, which was on a stand in the corner of the room, ready for her first night at home. It made it seem all the more real, and Harry was getting so excited to bring her home now, although he knew he would miss being pregnant desperately.

A few days later, Harry was awake at 6am, as was his usual nowadays. He was finding sleeping harder the bigger he got, and even the special paternity pillow Louis had got him wasn’t helping much. He just couldn’t get comfortable, and resorted to lots of cat naps throughout the day to keep himself going. He’d been overly emotional over the past few days, and Louis had been a godsend; infinitely patient and willing to do whatever he could to make things easier on Harry, although there wasn’t a lot he could do to ease his boyfriend’s aches and pains.

Harry was nesting too, and was forever cleaning, despite Louis’ protests that he was more than capable of wielding a duster around the place. Harry, of course, felt only he could do the job properly, and rummaged around in the under sink cupboard, brandishing the polish and a duster, attacking the kitchen first before he headed into the sitting room. He was dusting the sideboard, carefully moving some of Louis’ family photos before he dropped one to the floor with a clunk onto the carpet.

“Fuck,” he cursed, trying to bend down to reach the frame, soon giving up when he realised it just wasn’t happening. He carried on dusting, but when he went to polish the drawer fronts, he dropped the cloth again and burst into noisy sobs, covering his blotchy face with his hands, embarrassed to be crying yet again.

Familiar footsteps thundered down the stairs and Louis darted into the room, clearly expecting the worst, panic evident in his eyes.

“Harry, what is it? Is it the baby? Are you in pain?”

“I… no, I…” he sobbed again, the sounds leaving his body almost painful, and Louis hurried over, wrapping Harry up in arms, trying to console him. “Louis, I-” he gulped in air again, trying to catch his breath as he leant on Louis for support.

“Darling, please, I’m worried, what’s wrong?”

“I dropped the cloth, Louis!” Harry wailed loudly again and buried his head into Louis’ shoulder, feeling utterly ridiculous by now but unable to stop the tears from falling. “I’m just- I dropped it, and I can’t pick it up.”

He could feel Louis chuckle against his body but Harry couldn’t bring himself to care. All of his emotions were completely overwhelming at the moment, and the stupidest things felt enormous, just like this did. He sniffed and wiped his eyes on Louis’ t-shirt, not caring he was leaving big damp patches, finally standing up and cradling his bump. “God, I’m so pathetic-”

“Hey, no, you’re not! You’re pregnant, babe, and your body is full of hormones. Give yourself a break, please?” Louis kissed him before he bent down to pick up both the cloth and the frame Harry had knocked off, setting the picture back in its rightful place before he handed Harry the cloth. “Look, no harm done. Don’t cry sweetheart, it makes my heart hurt when you cry.”

“I’m sorry.” Harry looked down at the floor then, feeling slightly ridiculous. “I’m just so tired, and I hurt everywhere.”

“I know, baby, I get it. I’ve seen my mum through enough pregnancies to remember the toll it took on her. But I think you’re doing so amazingly, growing our gorgeous little girl in there.” He rubbed his hands on Harry’s huge tummy, finally drawing a smile out of his boy. “I can stay home today, if you want?”

“Nah, you need all your days for when the baby is born.” Harry kissed Louis softly, grateful Louis even offered to stay at home to take care of him. A few months ago, he couldn’t ever have dreamed this would be his reality. Now it was, Harry felt like the luckiest man in the world. “Go to work, we can cuddle up later and have dinner and watch a film or something.”

“Sounds perfect.” Louis held Harry close again, reluctant to let him go, loving the closeness the pair shared despite the fact they’d only been together a short while. Things had changed a lot since they’d had sex with each other, unafraid to be incredibly tactile with one another, and Louis loved helping out with his horniness, the pregnant man often insatiable at the moment, something fairly common according to the numerous google searches Harry had conducted about the matter, concerned his want for his boyfriend wasn’t at normal levels. That revelation had made Louis laugh.

Harry moaned when he heard the front door open later that night, his boyfriend finally returning home from work, but with him came a smell that had Harry struggling to sit up. “Oh my god, Lou, you didn't…”

“I did,” Louis said with a mischievous grin, holding up the bags of Chinese and wafting them around in the air before he came over to the sofa pushing Harry back down into it. “Stay there, you. I’ll grab some plates and we’ll eat in here and slob out.”

“Thanks, baby.” Harry smiled as Louis walked through to the kitchen, returning minutes later with two glasses of water and a few plates and bowls. He dragged the coffee table over and then pulled Harry into a more comfortable sitting position, handing him a plate of his favourite foods. Harry looked hungrily at the plate, managing to hold back until Louis had a plate too before he tucked in, manners present as always.

They ate as the television played in the background, Louis eventually taking Harry’s empty plate away from his bump, allowing him to stretch out his sore muscles. By the time the movie was over halfway through, Harry was moaning regularly, shifting around on the sofa, struggling to find a position to accommodate his aching back. The baby was laying on his bladder again, meaning he had the constant urge to pee, but he couldn’t be bothered to get up. One more wriggle and grunt of pain was all it needed for Louis to take action.

“Right, wait here, love,” he said, dashing off upstairs. Harry strained to hear what Louis was up to but he failed, not getting any sign of anything until Louis returned, in a small pair of shorts now, hair pushed back from his face. “Come on, then. I’ve run you a nice, warm bath. It’ll help your back, I promise. Up we go.” He helped haul Harry up and off the sofa and onto his feet, a hand on his lower back for support as they headed towards the stairs, Harry taking it slow and steady, neither man needing to rush.

“Oh, Lou, I can’t,” Harry whined, not even caring he sounded like a whinging child right now, failing miserably to get his t-shirt over his head. Louis just led him over to the toilet, sitting him down on the lid while he helped him out of his top, admiring the curve of his belly as he did so, at the dusky pink nipples in the middle of Harry’s chest. Harry then stood and Louis worked his trousers down to his ankles, along with his boxers, leaving both in a pile on the floor, shoving them to one side to be dealt with later on.

Louis supported Harry’s hand as he put one foot into the water, sighing with relief at the sensation of the water enveloping his body, and gently stepped in with the other, lowering himself carefully so as not to slip and hurt himself or the baby. Louis grabbed a clip and piled Harry’s hair out of the way on top of his head, kissing his forehead as he did so, a gesture so loving tears sprang to Harry’s eyes.

“You relax, babe,” Louis said, stepping over to the windowsill to light a few candles before he turned out the main light, the room bathed in a soft glow now. He leaned over the edge of the bathtub and pressed his lips to Harry’s, his tongue teasing at Harry’s lips before he pulled away, stroking his cheek gently with his fingertips. “I’ll pop back in a bit-”

“No!” Harry surprised himself by the suddenness of his reply, startling Louis to a standstill as well. “Sorry, I, uh, I just don’t want to be alone?” It came out as a question, and Louis nodded, crouching by the bath again, running a hand through the few tendrils of Harry’s hair that had fallen into his eyes.

“Okay baby, what do you need?” Harry’s eyes fluttered shut as Louis continued to stroke his hair, relishing the feeling of relaxation throughout his weary and aching body.

“Want you to join me in here,” he mumbled, not at all thinking about the logistics of squeezing not just one man, but one heavily pregnant man and his boyfriend into a normal sized bathtub. Louis stood up, frowning as he worked out how best to do this, obviously settling on a decision as he yanked his shorts and underwear down, standing bare in front of Harry. Immediately, Harry’s body responded to the sight, his hormones once again wreaking havoc with his body.

“Move forward, babe,” Louis said softly, watching as Harry wriggled forwards, his bump protruding over the edge of the water. He climbed in, placing a leg either side of Harry’s body, lowering himself into the water behind him. Harry nestled back the moment he felt Louis was sat down, and Louis shuffled around so Harry could rest his head on Louis’ shoulder, bodies moulded together under the water. Harry smiled as Louis’ hands came around and cupped his bump. “Can’t believe she’s nearly ready to be here,” Louis whispered, looking down in awe at Harry’s body and how it had changed in the few short months he’d known him.

“I‘m ready for her to come out now,” Harry admitted, laying his hands on top of Louis’. “I mean, I love being pregnant but I want my body back. Want to be able to be with you properly, want you to see how I look not all swollen and full of our baby.”

“I’ll love you either way, I promise.” Louis tucked his hand under Harry’s chin and angled them so he could kiss him, their lips meeting perfectly, Harry tasting of the minty lip balm he swore by at the moment. Louis didn't hesitate in deepening the kiss, pressing his tongue into Harry’s mouth, seeking out his tongue with his own. They both moaned as things got more heated between them, Louis’ cock hardening quickly behind Harry, digging into his lower back. “Shit, sorry-”

“Don’t be,” Harry mumbled, reaching behind him to brush his fingertips against Louis’ length. “I… I want you, Lou.” He kissed Louis deeply then, turning the upper half of his body, guiding Louis’ hand to his nipples, encouraging his boyfriend to play with them for a moment, enjoying the feel of Louis pinching and pulling at them. “Fuck- please Louis-”

“Okay, okay.” Harry couldn’t help but smirk as Louis gave in, knowing he was going to get what it was he wanted and needed. Being so close to a naked Louis was doing nothing to abate his sex drive, and luckily, Louis seemed as up for it as Harry was. “Wanna open yourself up, baby? Can’t reach from here.” Harry nodded and reached for the soap Louis was handing up, slicking up a couple of fingers before he slid them into the water.

He brought his legs up, resting them on top of Louis and relaxed himself before he circled his rim with one finger, teasing until he couldn’t bear it anymore. “Lou… touch me, my nipples,-” Louis complied quickly, both hands working quickly over Harry’s sensitive nipples now as Harry slid the first finger into himself, moaning loudly at the breach. “Oh fuck-”

“Feels good, huh?” Louis whispered into his ear, making Harry shudder.  His eyes stayed locked on the movement of Harry’s arm, his actions masked by the water, but the illusion of what he was doing was enough to keep Louis more than interested. “”Getting yourself ready for my cock?” Harry mumbled something that sounded like yes in reply, loving Louis’ dirty talk as he got himself ready, his finger sliding in and out, already needing more. “Another one then, love.”

Harry listened, pushing in a second finger alongside the first, Louis tugging Harry’s hair so he could kiss him as he did so. He felt jealous he couldn’t touch Harry where he needed to, so he walked his fingers down Harry’s swollen belly, brushing his fingers over the hair at the base of Harry’s cock, teasing him for a few minutes until Harry whined.

“Louis, please- touch me, fuck-” Harry bucked his hips then and Louis grasped his cock firmly, thumbing over the head and making Harry cry out his name, jutting up into the touch. “Oh my god, I need- I need you…” Harry’s tongue sought out Louis’ again, tangling together, Harry panting into Louis’ mouth, grinding back against both his fingers and Louis’ cock by now. “Inside, please-”

Louis nodded and released Harry’s cock, trying to work out how they were going to do this. “Right, baby, raise yourself up onto your knees… that’s it, let me straighten my legs- perfect. Okay, now you- oh shit-” Harry clearly understood as he took Louis’ cock in his hand and quickly lined himself up, sinking down on it without hesitation, bottoming out smoothly, moaning in pleasure as Louis filled him up, buried deep inside his body now. “Harry… fuck-”

“That’s the idea,” Harry murmured, starting to move his hips back and forth, letting his body get used to the feel of Louis inside him again, feeling full and sated already. “Louis… love this, feel so good, full of your baby and your cock, fuck-”

Louis could only lie back and admire the view of Harry’s backside against his thighs, his cock buried inside him, toned and lean back displayed to him. His hands came around Harry’s bump, supporting him as Harry started to bounce gently, the surface of the water sloshing around with his movements, but neither could bring themselves to care.  Harry leaned forwards then, bracing his hands on Louis’ shins, affording Louis an even better view as Harry slid up and down on Louis’ shaft, groaning as the tip of Louis’ cock grazed his prostate, sparks of pleasure zipping up and down his spine.

Louis moved one hand and gripped the handle at the side of the bathtub, keeping them both in the right position as Harry took charge, working himself on top of Louis again and again, taking whatever it was he needed from his boyfriend, Louis more than happy to allow him to. “Look so good, Haz. Just… fucking perfect, you’re so gorgeous, love you so much-”

“Love you too,” Harry returned, focusing again on his movements. Harry began to tire quite quickly, his legs straining with the exertion of moving his whole body up and down and Louis was quick to react, adjusting them so that Harry’s knees bore his weight, Louis’ feet now planted on the base of the tub, using the power in his thick thighs to fuck up hard into Harry.  “Oh my god- yes, harder, Lou- faster and harder-”

“God, you’re so amazing,” Louis rasped out, voice heavy with desire. “Take me so well, babe-” No more words were shared for a few minutes as Louis fucked Harry hard, whimpers and moans filling the bathroom instead, shadows cast by the candle bouncing off the tiles next to them, adding to the sultry atmosphere surrounding them. “Gonna make me come, look so good like this-”

“Make me come, please-” Harry begged, his eyes screwed shut in pleasure now.  Louis encouraged Harry to wank himself while he continued to fuck him, bodies moving in sync as they chased their orgasms. “Oh god- Louis- Lou, oh fuck-” Harry cried out loudly as he came hard, releasing into the water around them, body shuddering with the force of his orgasm, muscles clenching around Louis. Harry didn't move, though, letting Louis chase his own pleasure for a minute, not far behind Harry at all.

“Fuck, so hot-”  Louis’ hands grabbed at Harry’s full hips, digging into the flesh as he fucked hard a few more times, releasing into his boyfriend with a loud moan, Harry throwing his head back in pleasure at being filled with Louis’ warm come. Louis slowed his thrusts until his cock remained inside Harry, but when he want to pull out, Harry shook his head, grasping at Louis’ thighs underneath him.

“Stay inside, just for a minute, please?” Harry asked in such a soft voice, Louis knew he couldn’t refuse him. They sat together, joined intimately for a few minutes until Harry gently lifted himself off, Louis watched through the water as his cock emerged from Harry’s body, his boyfriend turning onto his side and snuggling up against Louis’ body. “Love you, Lou. Thank you for always being here for me. Best boyfriend in the world.”

“Not so bad yourself, love,” Louis chuckled, running his fingertips up Harry’s tattooed arms. He looked closely at the images etched into Harry’s skin, pondering them for a few moments. “Are you going to get a tattoo for our daughter when she’s here?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Harry mumbled sleepily, tired now. “Want to get her name or something, dunno where. Wanna get something for you, too.”

“Yeah, okay,” Louis laughed, thinking Harry must be joking.

“M’serious,” Harry muttered, his voice low and full of sleep, just how Louis liked it. “Want you and our girl, my family.” Louis didn't speak for a moment, blown away by Harry’s declaration. “Love you so much, my Louis.”

“I love you too, both of you.” Louis rubbed his hand again over Harry’s belly, smiling as his daughter kicked back as if she sensed her Papa’s hand somehow. “I’ll always love you, little love,” he whispered down to his daughter. “Forever and always.”

*****

Louis frowned down at his phone, a bit bothered by the fact it had been half an hour since Harry had last text him. He’d promised that while Louis was at the office, he’d stay in regular contact in case he needed something. Louis ignored the colleague who appeared at his cubicle, tapping out another message urging Harry to reply before he switched his attention again, looking blankly at Tara, the other journalist on his floor.

“Sorry, I wasn’t listening.” She just laughed at Louis’ candor, shaking her head gently with a smile on her face.

“Mind elsewhere?” she asked, and Louis nodded, sighing as he ran his fingers through his hair. His phone pinged and he snatched it up so fast, he was sure the movement must have been just a blur to Tara. He felt relief flood his veins as Harry said he was fine, that he was just watching telly on the sofa and had dozed off. “How far along is he?”

“Um, thirty eight weeks tomorrow.” The proud smile on Louis’ face said it all, and he brought up a picture of Harry and his bump he’d taken that morning, Harry in a t-shirt proclaiming ‘Daddy-to-be’ across the chest that Louis hadn’t been able to resist buying. “Beautiful, isn’t he? Glowing, I reckon.”

“He is,” Tara agreed, smiling at the heart eyes Louis was giving his phone. “Go home, Lou. You sent your articles in, go see your pregnant boy.” Louis nodded and switched off his computer, gathering up a few files for tomorrow in case he needed to work from home, and hugged Tara quickly.

“Thanks, love,” he mumbled into her hair, kissing her cheek before he hoisted his bag up and onto his shoulder. “See you in the morning.” She waved as Louis headed out, sweating in the late summer sunshine, surprised by the temperatures still clinging on. Traffic was light since he was early for the rush hour, and he was relieved to pull up into the driveway. He headed into the house, a little disturbed by the silence that greeted him. He toed off his shoes and left them by the door. “Haz?”

“In here,” came Harry’s reply, his voice sounding strained.  Louis followed the sound and found Harry in the sitting room, bent over the arm of the sofa, swaying his hips gently, breathing deeply. “Lou…”

“Harry? What are you doing?”

“I think it’s- uh…” he exhaled again, and gritted his teeth, Louis feeling alarmed now. He glanced down to Harry’s phone screen, confused to see a timer running. “Oh god-” He moaned lowly, a gutteral sort of moan, and Louis’ eyes widened.

“Oh my god, are you having contractions?”  Harry nodded, still breathing through the pain, and Louis started to panic, his heart racing in his chest. “Oh god, what do I do? Shall I call an ambulance? Oh, the bag, hang on-”

“Louis, STOP.” Louis halted immediately at Harry’s strict tone, facing his boyfriend who seemed oddly calm. “Babe, they’re still ten minutes apart. I’m fine, we don’t need to go yet. Just… please be calm, I need you to be calm.”

“Sorry, shit, I’ll try.” Louis went back over to Harry, rubbing his back, not sure how else to help. “Is there anything I can do?” Harry shook his head, standing up now the contraction seemed to be subsiding for now.

“Just… some water, please?” Louis nodded and hurried off, returning seconds later with a cold glass of water that Harry supped at before lowering himself carefully into the sofa. “Um, do you want to get the bag downstairs, in case?”

“Sure, you want anything else from upstairs?” Harry thought for a moment, eyes closing as he rested, already worn out.

“My phone charger and my iPod with the music on we chose. And, um, my pregnancy pillow please.”

“I love you so much,” Louis couldn’t resist saying, ducking his head to kiss Harry’s lips. He smiled then left Harry on the sofa, fetching all the things from upstairs, throwing a few things of his own into a gym bag just in case. He went down and dropped the bag by the front door, returning to Harry.

The next few hours passed by in much the same way. The television played quietly in the background as Louis supported Harry through each of his contractions, the pair timing the space between them on their iPhones, Louis getting a little more unsettled as they got closer together. Harry was insistent he was fine, that he was coping with the pain but it didn't do much to settle Louis’ worries.

“Look, let me ring my mum, see what she thinks?” he asked, fretting again. Harry gave in and nodded, slumping back down after another contraction passed, his tummy aching with the force of them by now. He walked into the kitchen, nibbling on a handful of nuts as his phone rang, his mum eventually picking up. He explained what was happening with Harry, and she was calm and collected, telling Louis to wait until his contractions were no closer than 5 minutes apart before they got to hospital.

“Thanks so much Mum… yeah, I’ll call you when we leave for the hospital. You too, love you.” He hung up and went back to the sitting room, Harry fanning him with the TV guide now, body sweating from his contractions. “Oh love, nothing I can do to help you?”

“I’m fine, honest,” Harry replied, smiling at Louis. “God, she’s coming, Lou. She’s early as well, two weeks early. Is she going to be okay?”

“Yeah, Mum said anything past thirty seven weeks is classed as full term, so there’s no need to worry. I think we should go soon.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Harry mused, the familiar tug of another contraction wracking his body. “Oh god…” he moaned and stood up, Louis massaging his lower back as he breathed through the contraction, rocking slightly to ease the pain. “Oh, Louis, make it stop-”

“It’ll all be worth it, baby, when our little girl is in our arms.” They stayed there for a few minutes, and slowly Harry righted himself, gasping when something warm ran down his legs, pooling on the carpet under his feet. “Oh fuck-”

“Is that-”

“Yeah, shit, I think my water just broke.” Harry was stunned, and Louis jumped into action, sprinting upstairs to grab Harry some clothes before he returned, leading Harry away from the puddle on the floor under his socked feet. “Oh god...”

“Come on, let’s get you into some dry clothes.” Louis made quick work of helping Harry out of his sodden shorts and boxers, pulling a fresh pair of joggers over his thighs, not bothering with underwear this time around.

“”Louis, our carpet, I’m so sorry-”

“Fuck the carpet Haz, our daughter is on the way, come on!” Harry beamed at Louis’ words, stumbling forwards as Louis guided him into the hallway. He stopped and kissed him quickly before he helped his boyfriend out to the car, and went back inside, grabbing the bags and shoving them into the boot before he checked and double-checked they had everything, Harry moaning as another contraction hit. “Sorry, I’m coming, love.”

“Please hurry, I don’t want her to be born in the passenger seat of your car-”

“She won’t,” chuckled Louis, gripping Harry’s hand now as he drove towards the hospital. “I’ll get you to the hospital, baby, trust me. Let’s go have our baby girl.”


	7. The Birth

Harry breathed through the pain of yet another contraction, leaning over the boot of Louis’ car, his boyfriend stood behind him rubbing his back, bags at their feet.

“Okay?” came Louis’ voice, breaking Harry out of his reverie. He nodded and stood up, hobbling towards the hospital entrance, his arm linked through Louis’. They stopped at the entrance to the Maternity and Paternity unit, Louis putting the bags on the floor before he spoke to the kind faced woman sat behind the desk offering them both a smile.

“Hi, um, my boyfriend Harry Styles is in labour, we’re down to give birth here?” She tapped at her computer and nodded.

“Let me go and get a midwife for you, I won’t be a tick,” she said softly, smiling at them as she walked away, returning minutes later with a lady in light blue scrubs by her side.

“Hello Harry, I’m Gina, I’ll be your midwife today. Are you Harry’s husband?” Harry’s eyebrows raised as he looked at Louis, the pair sharing a secret smile before Louis answered.

“Uh, not yet, I’m his boyfriend, Louis Tomlinson.” He reached forwards and shook Gina’s hand, the three of them moving slowly towards the birthing floor, Gina leading them into a spacious room, walls painted light blue, the smell of antiseptic in the air. “Wow, this is wonderful.” Harry just walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge, breathing deeply as he felt another contraction begin. He moaned lowly, getting the attention of both Louis and Gina, who hurried over, crouching in front of Harry.

“Contraction, love?” she asked, and Harry nodded, gritting his teeth in pain. “Okay, breathe through it for me then I’ll hook you up with a foetal monitor and pain relief if you’d like.” Harry shook his head then, and clutched Louis’ hands, the pair breathing through the contraction as Gina grabbed some equipment. The contraction ended and Louis helped ease Harry back onto the bed, bustling away as Gina approached with the monitor, hooking up Harry’s t-shirt to wrap it around the expanse of his belly.

“This will track the baby’s heartbeat and your contractions-”

“I’ve had one on before,” Harry interrupted, wincing at the tightness of the band on his belly. “I know the drill.”

“Oh, that’s good. Right, did you want pain relief, did you have a birth plan for me to look at?”

“Oh, I have that!” Louis piped up, rifling through Harry’s bag and pulling out a bundle of paperwork, handing it over to Gina who flicked through it.

“Okay, so you want a water birth, that’s fine, we have a pool here you can use. If you like, we can get you in there when you’re past 6cm dilated, and I’m happy you’re progressing well. Is that something you’d be interested in?”

“Yes, please,” Harry nodded, reaching for Louis again, smiling at his boyfriend.

“Right. Well feel free to put some music on, the dock is over there on the chest, and if you need anything at all, just let me know. In the meantime, make yourself at home. Harry, when you get another contraction, just grab the tube by the bed and inhale deeply on the tube, it’s Etonox, gas and air. I’ll be back soon, but come and grab me if you need anything, or press the buzzer if it’s urgent.”

“We will, thank you,” Louis said, Gina leaving and closing the door behind her.  “How are you feeling, gorgeous?”

“I’m okay, bit nervous but I can’t believe this is happening,” Harry said from where he was stuck on the bed, belly wrapped in monitors. Louis pulled out his phone and snapped a photo of Harry before he could hide face away, Harry grimacing at the thought of capturing any of these moments. “Oh Lou, don’t. I look awful, please don’t.”

“You look beautiful. You’re having our baby, Haz, I want to remember this forever, show her when she’s older how her Daddy looked before she was born.” Harry rolled his eyes at Louis’ soppiness, watching on as Louis unfolded several things from their bags, including a pair of swim shorts for himself, both of them wanting Louis to be in the pool with Harry when the time came. Louis wanted to be as hands on as he could, keen to take part in the birth as much as Harry would allow. “Can I get you anything? A drink? Change of clothes?”

“Um, can we burn my incense sticks? It smells of hospitals in here, and I don’t like it,” Harry admitted, and Louis nodded, grabbing the vanilla sticks from the bag and setting them down across the room on a bare table, lighting them with his lighter. Harry groaned as another contraction pulsed through his stomach, his belly tightening and Louis walked over, observing the readout from the monitor Harry was attached to, the needle moving frequently with Harry’s contraction.

The next hour passed by in the same way, Harry on the bed, breathing through contractions with Louis at his side, still hooked up to the monitor. Gina came in a while later, checking up on the two of them.

“How are things? I’d like to do a quick exam while we’re between contractions, Harry, if that’s okay with you?” Harry nodded, and Louis helped him out of his joggers, covering his bare lower half with the sheet from the end of the bed.

“Thank you,” Harry whispered, Louis kissing his lips quickly, holding Harry’s hand as Gina settled at the end of the bed, hitching the sheet up. Harry hissed as Gina began her exam, screwing up his eyes at the stretch, Louis wincing in sympathy.

“I’m sorry,” Gina apologised, withdrawing her fingers and disposing of the gloves. “Well, good news is you’re at 4cm, so not much longer until you can get in the pool. Is the gas and air working for you?”

“Yeah, I feel a little sick after using it, but it’s good with the pain.”

“That’s quite normal. I’ll leave you both to it, but I’ll check on you in a while.” She left again, and Louis perched on the edge of the bed as Harry laid back, making himself as comfortable as possible.

“Mind if I give my Mum a ring? She wanted to be here, and even if you don’t want her in here, I’d feel better if she was around…”

“Lou, it’s fine, call her. I want to meet her anyway, before her granddaughter is born.” They kissed softly for a moment, Harry losing himself in the kiss for a minute. “I love you, Louis. I’m so happy you’re here, by my side through this.”

“Nowhere I would ever want to be rather than here,” Louis replied, standing up and grabbing his phone from the side table. “I’ll be back in a sec, okay? Shout if you need me.”

Harry laughed, letting Louis’ hand drop from his own for a second. “Babe, I’ll be fine for a few minutes, go and call Jay.” Louis nodded and blew Harry a kiss before he slipped through the door, closing the door behind him. He wriggled around on the bed, shutting his eyes for a second, the room peaceful now he was alone. By the time Louis came in, Harry had nodded off, in a fitful sleep, dreaming of the family he was about to make a reality.

*****

Three hours later, Harry was fed up, and Louis felt helpless. Harry’s labour had only progressed another centimetre. Gina had been pleased with his contractions so had unhooked him from the foetal monitor, allowing Harry to walk around the room freely with Louis supporting him, trying to get through the contractions as best he could. Harry had taken to bouncing on the birthing ball a lot more now, finding it eased the pains in his lower back, and Louis hadn’t been able to resist making some quips which quickly pissed Harry off.

“Looks like when you’re bouncing on my cock, babe,” Louis said with a giggle, Harry just throwing him a look of disdain as he stilled his bounces, rolling his hips slightly instead now. “Sorry, just wanted to make you laugh…”

“Sex is honestly the very last thing on my mind,” Harry muttered through gritted teeth. “You’ll be lucky if you ever get your cock in me again after this.”

Louis didn't find it quite so funny after that, instead deciding to be supportive, doing whatever he could to assist Harry rather than piss him off. He’d just settled Harry back on the bed, leaving the ball to one side when there was a soft knock at the door, and he walked over to answer it, glancing back at the bed to check Harry was okay before he opened it. His face lit up, and straight away, Harry knew who was on the other side.

“Mum! That was quick!”

“I left as soon as you called me earlier, sweetheart, I wanted to be here for you both. Can I come in?” Louis looked back to Harry who nodded, and hugged her, pulling her into the room.

“Mum, I am so excited for you to meet my Harry. Harry, this is my Mum, Jay.” Harry moved to get off the bed but Jay hurried over, stopping him.

“You stay put, love. You need to conserve your energy.  So wonderful to meet the boy who has stolen my Lou’s heart. You look fantastic, love.” Harry blushed but hugged Jay, and she cradled his bump as they parted. “Wow, what a belly. How dilated are you?”

“Only four centimetres.” Harry moaned as another contraction ripped through him, and Jay held out her arms, Harry immediately grasping them and steadying himself, rocking his hips back and forth with the pain again.

“Good, and breath in and out deeply, well done.” Louis stood back and watched his Mum and boyfriend connect, the pair bonding quicker than Jess and Jay ever did. Jay helped Harry through his contraction, walking back and forth with him as Louis smoothed out Harry’s sheets and plumped his pillow, feeling a bit like a spare part.

After another few contractions, and Jay, Harry and Louis had a chance to talk and catch up, Gina returned, ready to do another exam on Harry. Jay left the room, leaving Louis to support Harry but returned when Gina left, Harry excited to have already progressed another two centimetres, meaning he could get in the pool. A short while later, the pool was ready and the three of them walked slowly down the corridor, Louis holding Harry’s arm and Jay carrying their bags as they went to the birthing room allocated to those who wanted to use the birthing pool.

Harry was pleased to see the room was as calming as the other one, although the walls in here were a mint green compared to the light blue of the other room. Jay put out Harry’s incense sticks again, and laid out a few of his other clothes in case he needed them. Gina explained how Harry could use the pool to help him, that he could stay in there as long as he was comfortable, and that he could come out at any point too.

“I will hang around to monitor you, but I also understand you need some privacy, so please do feel free to tell me if you need some time alone.”

“Um, sorry to interrupt, but I’m a midwife, up in Doncaster where I live. I’m happy to keep an eye on things when you leave, I’ll come and get you if there’s any problems, but it might make you and the boys feel more at ease with me here?”

“Well, that’s great to know, Mrs Tomlinson, thank you.” Gina smiled and left again, Harry staring longingly at the pool.

“Did you want to get in, love?” Louis asked, and Harry nodded, hands on his lower back as he contemplated how good the water would feel around him, alleviating the ache of his heavy belly as his daughter made her way to prepare for birth. “Right, uh, Mum, how do we do this?”

“Well, it’s up to Harry. He can wear what he wants, although I wouldn’t advise you get in just yet, Lou, save that for when you’re really needed, when your little girl is on her way.” Louis nodded and stood next to Harry, letting Harry hug him, bearing his weight as Harry leaned onto his shoulders, breathing deeply again. “Harry, love, do you want me to go while Lou helps you into the pool?”

“Mmm, no, it’s fine. You’re a midwife, right? Seen it all before. I’m fine with you staying, Lou is that okay with you?”

“Whatever you want, baby,” Louis reassured him as Jay pushed up her sleeves, getting ready to help Louis with Harry.

“No problem, Harry. As I said, it’s fine by me if it’s okay with you two. What did you want to wear in the pool?”

“Um, nothing, just… I read it’s easier to not wear anything on my bottom half because of being checked and stuff?”

“We prefer it if you don’t but again, that’s up to you.”

“Take it off, Lou,” Harry mumbled, sensing another contraction was on its way.

“Hang on, Louis,” Jay said, halting Louis in his tracks. Louis panicked, thinking he’d done something wrong, and watched as Harry’s face screwed up in pain. He led him gently over to the bed, passing him the gas and air for Harry to suck on. “Sorry love, I don’t want to get him into the pool until this one has passed, okay?”

“You’re the boss,” Louis said with a grin, watching Harry get himself through the contraction, in complete awe of how his amazing boyfriend was dealing with this labour. It had been six hours already, and Harry was still going strong, not giving in to the need for stronger pain relief. “You’re doing brilliantly, sweetheart. So proud of you, so strong. Love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Harry muttered back through the pain, hand scrabbling for Louis’ as another wave of pain took hold. “Oh god, how much more of this is there…” Louis just smoothed back Harry’s hair, watching him inhale the gas, hoping it was helping somewhat. He could see when the contraction started to cease, Harry relaxing and slowly getting to his feet, Louis supporting him every step.

“Okay, Harry, Louis will help you get undressed then we will get you in the pool, okay?”Jay spoke with a professional tone that Harry appreciated. The pair of them nodded, and she turned back to the pool as Louis gently removed Harry’s top, throwing it onto the bed before he stood in front of Harry again.

“Um, you sure you’re okay with this, being naked in front of my Mum, I mean?”

“Lou, she’s a midwife, it’s fine. I’m sure she’s not gonna be staring at my dick anyway.” Louis giggled at that and nodded, hooking his fingers in Harry’s waistband and pulling them down so Harry could step out of them. He stood back for a second and admired his boyfriend’s pregnant and naked form for what could be the last time. “Stop staring, Louis.”

“Sorry, you’re just so beautiful,” Louis said, snapping back to reality. He helped Harry over to the pool, and Jay turned around, supporting Harry’s other arm as he climbed in, taking care to lower himself  gently into the water, sighing in instant relief as he sank down completely into the water.”Better, sweetheart?”

“God, yes,” Harry said, kneeling on the floor of the pool, elbows on the side as he stared up at Louis and Jay. “Jay, can I still have gas and air in here?”

“Of course, love,” she said, unhooking the tank from where it was on the wall and pulling it over, handing Harry the tube.  “Use it the same as you have been, and feel free to move around in the water, find a position that’s comfortable for you.”

“I’m okay like this,” Harry mumbled, holding Louis’ hand as he knelt opposite Harry outside the pool. “Lou, can I have a drink please?”

“Course, darling,” he said, clambering to his feet and grabbing the water bottle they’d brought with them for ease. Harry slurped on it for a minute before he handed it back. “Anything else, babe?”

“Music?” Louis kissed him and nodded before he put the iPod on the dock, soft music filling the room before Louis came back. He noticed Jay had put down a towel for him to protect his knees, and he loved how thoughtful his mum was.  They talked quietly between themselves, Jay keeping an eye from afar as Louis and Harry shared private moments, Louis brushing Harry’s hair back from his face with a loving touch that warmed Jay’s heart, happy to see her son so in love.

“Can’t wait to meet her,” Louis whispered, Harry smiling at his words. “I think she’s going to have your dark hair, and I hope she has your beautiful eyes. Harry, I know we mentioned it before, but.. Do you still want her to be a Tomlinson?”

Harry nodded, eyes wide as he locked onto Louis’. “More than anything. And I heard what you said when we got here, that I wasn’t your husband  _ yet _ . I… I want that, to be your husband, Lou. Want us to have the same name, to have more babies...ow, oh god,not again…”

Jay stood up and came over, talking Harry through his contraction, feeling his belly when it subsided.

“Harry, love, can you sit on your bum for me? I want to check the baby’s position.” Louis watched as Harry rolled over, exposing his more private parts for a moment. Louis could only hope his mum was paying a lot less attention to it than he was. “Thanks, love. I’m just going to press on your belly, okay? It shouldn’t hurt too much.” Louis watched as her hands delved onto Harry’s bump, using her professional judgment to work out how the baby was positioned.

She withdrew her hands from the water, Harry staying where he was for a moment as she dried her hands. “Okay, she’s head down which is great, means she’s ready for birth. We just need to get you to that magic ten centimetres so you can start pushing.”

Harry nodded, sending Louis a wobbly smile. “Um, I, uh, I need the loo?” Louis looked to Jay who stood next to him, and they helped Harry out onto the towel by the poolside. Louis knelt down and towel dried Harry off quickly, wrapping the towel around his waist as he helped him over to the small bathroom, closing the door behind them. “Lou, I…”

“Don’t worry, I’m right here,” Louis said, helping lower Harry down onto the toilet seat.  It was safer for Harry to sit down for a wee at the moment, and neither man flinched at the need for intimacy here, both too comfortable with each other to care.

“Thank you, for looking after me so well,” Harry whispered as he finished, standing up and bringing the towel around himself again before getting flustered and throwing it to the floor. “Oh fuck it, you’ve all seen all of me now, I wanna get back in the pool.” Louis laughed and nodded, reaching to flush the loo before they headed back out, Jay not batting an eyelid at Harry’s nudity.  Together, they helped Harry back into the water, Harry soon relaxing again.

The door opened then and Gina came in, smiling at the three people in the room.

“Everything going okay in here?” Harry nodded, his eyes shut as he rested his cheek against the side of the pool, catching a moment’s rest between contractions. “Excellent. Harry, do you mind if I do a quick exam?” Harry shook his head and went to move, but Gina stopped him with a hand on his wrist. “Stay there, love, I’ll work around what’s comfortable for you.”

“Thank you,” he mumbled, and reached out for Louis who came over to hold Harry’s hand through this bit again. Gina reached around and did the exam, being as quick as possible. Harry moaned, and in any other situation, Louis would have been automatically turned on at the sound, but there was a pained tone to it that only invoked his need to protect Harry and take his pain away.

“Okay, you’re at nine centimetres, love, only one more to go. You’re doing brilliantly. Can I get you anything? Are you happy in the pool?”

“I wanna stay in here,” Harry muttered, exhausted after eight long hours of labour, although he was aware he was progressing a lot faster than most first time mothers and fathers giving birth. Still, it didn't help his immediate situation.

“That’s fine. I’ll come back very soon and see if we’re ready to push and get this baby out, okay? Jay, you’re doing a great job, thank you. Louis, are you alright, too?”

“I’m fine, just want to support my Harry,” he said, kissing his boyfriend’s sweaty head again. Jay and Gina shared a smile before she left.

Harry used the gas and air through his next few contractions, and Jay could sense the birth was getting nearer from Harry’s low, guttural moans and the way his body was moving. A few minutes later, things started to change.

“Oh god, Louis, I wanna push… ohhhhhhhh-” Louis panicked slightly, his head flying around to look for his mum, who typically had gone to find the ladies loo, wanting to keep Harry’s bathroom just for him.

“Okay, oh god, just wait, let me get my Mum-” Louis stood up and ran out of the door, ignoring Harry’s cries behind him and almost slammed into his mum as he turned the corner, panting and red-cheeked, unable to believe this was really happening. “Oh my god, Mum, he’s - Harry wants to push-”

“Louis, calm down. Is he okay?”

Louis nodded frantically, grabbing her hand and marching her back to Harry’s room, stilling outside the door for a moment. “Shit, I- I don’t know if I can do this, watch him in this much pain. Fuck, oh god-”

“Louis William Tomlinson, you listen to me. That boy is scared, and he needs you to support him. You’re going to be a dad, Louis. It’s time to step up, sweetheart. Ready?” Louis’ eyes filled with tears but he nodded, letting his mum hug for a moment.

“Ready. Let’s go bring my daughter into the world.” They shared an uncannily similar smile before they knocked and walked into the room, Harry breathing heavily on the gas and air now, rocking his hips back and forth. Jay walked over and pressed the buzzer on the wall before she headed over to Harry, surprised by what she saw.

“Oh goodness. Louis, if you’re getting in the pool, hurry up about it, this little girl is on her way.” He gasped and nodded, running to where his mum was stood, seeing the start of his daughter’s head beginning to crown.

“Fuck.” He grabbed his swimming trunks and darted into the bathroom, yanking his clothes off and tugging them on before bursting back into the main room, yanking off his left sock. Harry looked at him with fear filled eyes, and Louis wished he could take all Harry’s pain and fear away. “Baby, it’s okay, this is the last bit, I promise. I’m coming, sweetheart.” He walked over to the water and watched as Jay helped Harry back onto his bum, sitting him down so Louis could climb in behind him.

Jay was pulling on a pair of gloves, mumbling something under her breath as Louis sat down, Harry reaching for his hands straight away, gripping them tightly like a vice. Louis kissed the back of his head. “Here we go, sweetheart. Let’s have a baby, yeah?”

*****

“Oh god, Louis, I’m scared, shit-” Harry mumbled, fear filling him now as he watched Jay prepare, the pressure around his entrance so much now as his baby girl made her way down. “Oh god, I need to push….ohhhhhhh.” He let out a low moan and Jay looked up, leaning up against the edge of the pool.

“Harry, you need to listen to me, love. Don’t push until you have a contraction, and I’m going to talk you through it, okay? If you push too soon, you could tear. Alright?” Harry just nodded, not letting go of Louis’ hands for a second. “Now tell me when you feel it coming.” She got up and pressed the buzzer again, not wanting to use the emergency one but knowing she needed assistance, especially for a water birth.

“Oh god, now, fuck-” Harry cried out as the contraction took hold, and Jay plunged her hands into the water, feeling for the baby between Harry’s spread legs.

“Excellent, Harry. And push down for me into your bottom, that’s it.” Harry scrunched his eyes shut and clutched Louis’ hands tightly as he pushed with everything he had, bearing down hard. “Good, and relax.” Harry let out a huge breath and then gulped the air back in, resting his head back against Louis’ chest, waiting for the next contraction. The door opened and Gina bustled in, pulling on a pair of gloves and crouching down with Jay.

“I’m so sorry, we had twins in foetal distress, we had to prepare the mother for an emergency section.”

“Everything okay?” Jay asked, knowing the seriousness of a situation like that, especially being mother to two sets of twins herself.

“I hope so,” Gina said, readying herself, making sure the things she needed were in the room. She leaned in but Harry shook his head, almost kicking out, in distress himself now.

“No, I only want Jay, please-“ Harry begged, and Louis dropped his hands, holding Harry tightly in an effort to try and calm him down. He looked at his Mum, wondering what to do, knowing they needed to keep Harry calm and comfortable, not in a heightened state like he was working himself up to.

“I mean, it’s not exactly protocol, but Jay, I’m happy if you are,” Gina acquiesced, keen to do whatever it took to make Harry happy. She nodded and Harry exhaled shakily, mumbling words of thanks, crying out as another contraction took hold.

“Okay Harry, same as before, big pushes for me, okay?” He nodded and bore down once more, feeling the baby move further down with each push of his muscles. He used his leverage on Louis’ hands to bear down harder, and again, the contraction subsided without any further movement of the baby. “She’s coming love, I want another big push with your next contraction, okay?”

“Yeah, just... god, so tired,” Harry whimpered, breaths shaky with emotion by now.

“I know, love, you’re so amazing,” Louis said, letting go of Harry’s hand for a moment to push Harry’s hair back, stroking his cheek gently. “I’m so proud of you, love you so much-“

“Oh god-“ Harry swore as his next contraction approached quickly, his body more than ready to help his baby girl out as soon as possible. “Ow, fuck-“

“Good, she’s coming Harry, I can see the top of her head, keep pushing-“ Harry cried out at the pain as her head descended further, and he panted, the contraction releasing but his baby staying put. “Harry, reach down, you can feel her head, sweetheart.” Harry did, and sobbed slightly as he touched the top of her head, realising that was the first contact with his baby.

“Lou... feel-“ Louis did and gasped himself, their hands both touching the very tip of her head. “Oh no-“

Another contraction wracked Harry’s body then and he bore down, the pain becoming worse as she came down further.

“Okay, Harry, she’s crowning. This bit will sting, but let me guide her. I want you to pant as you push, okay, not too strong. When you’re ready, go for it.” Harry nodded and did as Jay asked, Louis supporting him with his words. Harry screamed out as he pushed, her head popping free from his body, supported by the water and Jay’s gentle hands. “Nearly there, darling, you’re doing so well.”

“Oh god, Haz, look, I can see her head,” Louis mumbled, sitting up enough to look down between Harry’s legs, seeing the shadow of his daughter’s head emerging from Harry. “Fucking hell, Haz, you’re amazing-“

“Okay, Louis, get back down, here we go. Shoulders now, Harry, I need a big push okay?” Gina watched on as Jay expertly guided the baby girl out, Harry pushing with all his might. “Right, stop, Harry, stop. I can feel the contraction is stopping, wait for the next one, squeeze Lou’s hands and give it everything you’ve got. I think with this one she’ll be born.”

“Oh god, Lou-“

“I’m right here, darling. I’m here,” Louis soothed, kissing the cheek that Harry pushed back towards him. Harry twisted away for a second, and they looked at each other, sharing wobbly smiles before Harry’s face creased in pain again, Jay’s hands back below the water. “Come on love, let’s do this, you can do this.”

Harry grunted and moaned as he pushed down hard, with every fibre of his being, Jay, Gina and Louis encouraging his every push, and suddenly, he felt a whoosh as the baby pushed out of him, into Jay’s hands, still under the surface of the water. She reacted quickly, scooping up the little girl from under the water.

Harry was in a state of shock, and he couldn’t believe it as Jay plopped a wriggly and wet baby straight onto his chest. Louis was crying behind him and Harry’s hands were trembling as they held on tight to his daughter, Gina rubbing at her back with a towel, trying to prompt a cry from her.

There wasn’t a dry eye as the baby made her first wail, the piercing cry filling the room with life and joy. Harry sobbed as he held her against his torso, her little body writhing with her cries, the pair still connected by the umbilical cord. Jay and Gina continued whatever it was they needed to do, clamping the baby’s cord while Louis hugged Harry and his daughter, kissing Harry’s cheek, his hand on his daughter’s back.

“Oh Harry, she’s so perfect, oh my god, I love her so much,” Louis mumbled, watching Harry cry as he held their daughter to him. They were both looking down at her with such awe, the exhaustion of the past hours instantly melted away into nothing.

“Louis, she’s here-“ Harry cried again, turning his head to press a rough kiss against Louis’ lips, Jay watching on fondly, full of emotion.

“Um, Lou, do you want to cut the cord sweetheart?” Jay handed Louis the scissors and he did so with a proud grin. “Harry, I need to take her for a minute, do her checks, okay?” Harry reluctantly let her go, happy she was safe in the arms of her nanny, and cuddled back up to Louis.

“We’re dads, Lou, she’s here and she’s so perfect, did you see her little fingers, and her lips, and-“ He cried again and Louis tugged him closer, the pair sharing a moment while Jay weighed and wrapped up their daughter. Gina dealt efficiently with the afterbirth while Louis got out of the pool, getting changed before he helped Harry with the same. Harry winced as he stood up, pain between his legs, and his belly felt oddly empty. Louis dressed him with such love and care, and settled him back on the bed.

Jay walked back over with a wrapped up bundle in her arms, the proudest smile on her face Harry thought he had ever seen. “She’s tiny, Harry, but utterly perfect. Five pounds, three ounces. 47 centimetres long. She’s beautiful. Congratulations.” She put the baby gently into Harry’s waiting arms, watching her son and his boyfriend with their daughter, starting their family together.

“Does she have a name?” Gina asked, standing next to Jay, looking down at the proud parents.

“Louis, you hold her,” Harry encouraged, ignoring the question for a moment. They fumbled for a second but managed to pass her between them, Harry getting emotional at the sight of Louis with their daughter for the first time. “Jay, can you...” he pointed at Louis’ phone and she nodded, opening the camera app. They smiled at the phone as Jay snapped some photos, the pair squeezed onto the bed together.

Gina left, sensing the family needed some privacy, and she was satisfied Harry and the baby were both healthy. Louis kissed his daughter’s soft lips, cooing at how beautiful she was, he and Harry commenting on every little feature they could see.

“She’s stunning, darlings.” Jay hugged Harry, and then Louis, kissing her son’s head, then her granddaughter’s.

“Jay, thank you. For bringing our daughter into the world, you were amazing, I can’t ever thank you-“

“Harry, you don’t need to, love. You’re family, just like this little girl.” Harry’s heart felt warm at how easily Jay had accepted both him and his daughter into her fold, like they’d always been there. He was worried that the fact Louis wasn’t the baby’s biological father would play a part but it seemingly didn’t, no-one mentioning it at all. “Listen, I’m going to leave you alone for a little while, but I’ll be back in a bit, okay?”

They nodded but barely acknowledged Jay as she disappeared, leaving the family unit together and alone. Louis handed the baby back to Harry, taking a few photos on his phone of his boyfriend and their daughter.

“Harry... my mum meant it you know, when she said you’re family. You and our baby. Blood... it doesn’t matter to me. I choose you, and I choose our daughter, I will always choose the pair of you. You’re my world, my family, and I want both of you, forever.”

“I love you,” Harry whispered, kissing Louis above their daughter’s head. They just sat in silence for a while until the baby started crying, and Gina came back in with a small bottle of formula, teaching Harry how to coax the teat into her mouth, the baby drinking hungrily, and then Louis expertly burped her, well versed in this after years of raising his siblings. Harry looked on as Louis laid her down in the plastic crib, and they fell asleep on the bed together while their daughter slept beside them in her own bed.

They woke up when Jay returned, an “It’s a Girl!” balloon in her hand along with a purple gift bag stuffed full of presents which she handed to Louis, her son thanking her profusely. Harry got emotional at the sight, and hugged Jay tightly, already knowing this woman was going to be a special presence in his life. Gingerly, he got off the bed and picked up his sleeping daughter, hobbling painfully over to Jay, still sore after giving birth just hours before.

“Um, Jay,” he began, Louis nodding softly at his side. “We would love for you to meet our daughter, your granddaughter...”

He handed the baby over into her arms as Louis spoke, holding Harry’s free hand now in his own.

“Ella Johannah Marie Tomlinson.”

“Oh my goodness,” Jay mumbled, tears starting to fall as she cradled the baby girl to her chest, kissing her soft cheeks. “You... you didn’t have to-“

“We know. We wanted to. You brought her into the world, and we will make sure she knows how special her Nanny is for that,” Harry said, cuddling up against Louis now. There was another knock at the door, and Louis kissed Harry, heading over to see who was there.

“Hey, come in,” Louis said, and Harry grinned as Jess stepped inside the room. Jay masked her surprise well, and greeted her former daughter-in-law with a smile, her arms otherwise occupied with the baby. Jay handed the baby back to Harry with a final kiss to her head, whispering to Harry she’d come back later on, Harry protesting before he realised she was trying to give them some time with Jess. Harry thanked her and she left, kissing Louis and hugging Jess goodbye.

“She’s beautiful, you two,” Jess said in a soft voice, peering in at the little bundle in Harry’s arms, still sleeping away. “Harry, you did an amazing job, congratulations.”

“Thank you Jess.” She bent over and hugged him, running her finger down the baby’s cheek. “Um, would you like to hold her?” Jess nodded and slipped off her coat, a colourful t-shirt underneath. She leaned in and Harry helped put the baby in the crook of her arms, feeling oddly okay about her holding his daughter. She looked content as well, Ella snuggling in to yet another warm body holding her close.

“Oh, she’s so tiny, does she have a name?”

“Ella. Ella Johannah Marie Tomlinson.” Louis winked at Harry then, the pair smiling at each other as Louis wandered over to Jess, peering down at his daughter. “You like it?”

“It’s a beautiful name for a beautiful girl.” Jess said, sitting down in the chair Louis dragged over for her. “There’s a bag of things by the door for her, from me. How was the birth, Harry?”

“Thank you, you didn’t have to but thank you,” Harry said, watching with protective new daddy eyes as Jess jostled Ella’s position slightly, making herself comfortable. “It was horrible. Hurt like hell, but Lou was amazing, and she’s totally worth every second of pain, without a doubt.” They discussed things for a little while longer until Ella started to grizzle, and Louis got another bottle of milk ready, taking charge of feeding his daughter now, watched by Harry and Jess who were talking quietly.

“Um, I haven’t told Louis yet, I will do, but I needed you both to know. I, uh, I’ve met someone. His name’s Ricky and he’s really nice, we met through a friend of a friend. He lives about half an hour away from my Mum’s place. He’s great, in marketing and he makes me smile. I just wanted you to know there’s no hard feelings, that I’m moving on and I’m pleased for you, both of you. And I’m happy you get to keep your baby, Harry. I never really got the feeling you ever wanted to give her away.”

“I didn’t, not really,” Harry admitted, heart melting as Louis changed Ella’s position on his chest, holding her against him to burp her, muslin cloth thrown expertly over his shoulder to catch any spit up. “But I’m pleased you’ve found someone. I really am sorry, for how things happened. I never meant to hurt you, neither of us did.”

“It’s okay. You know, our marriage wasn’t in a good place to begin with, we’d been struggling for a while. I think we were both reluctant to admit things were over, and just kept going, living day to day, as you do. But the way he looked at you.. it’s how he used to look at me when we started going out. He fell so quickly for you, and although he tried to deny it, I could see it. I could see you felt the same as well, and I hated that I was in the way of you both being together.”

“You knew? Jesus, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you-“

“Harry, it’s okay. I know you didn’t. But it made it easier in a way that you two created a catalyst for Louis and I to confront our feelings and the fact our marriage was over. I’m honestly happy for you two, and I hope you two and Ella are happy together for a long time.”

“I won’t be letting them go, either of them,” Harry admitted, accepting a tight hug from Jess, a smile on both of their faces. “And I’ll let you tell Lou, as well. It’s the least I can do.”

“Thank you.” She kissed Harry’s cheek and shrugged on her coat, heading over to Louis and Ella, kissing both of them gently. “Bye, Lou. Be happy, okay? You’ve got everything you ever wanted, don’t screw it up, please?”

“I won’t,” Louis promised her, kissing his daughter’s soft lips again. “Thank you, for coming to see us. It means a lot. Take care, love.”

“You too, bye Lou. Bye Harry.” She turned and smiled and slipped out of the door, gone as quickly as she came.

“Well, that was nice,” Harry said, accepting his daughter back from Louis again. “She didn’t have to be so kind to me, or to you, really.”

“I know, I think I need to talk to her before we start the divorce proceedings,” Louis admitted, sitting down on the bed next to Harry again, touching the top of his daughter’s tiny head. “I hope I can take you both home soon, I hate hospitals.”

“Me too, want to get her back to our home,” Harry admitted, cuddling up to Louis again, the other man wrapping his arms around his family. “Just want to start our forever together.”

*****

Their wish was granted, and Louis was allowed to take Harry and Ella home later that day. Both were given a clean bill of health by Gina and sent on their way, Louis having to make several trips with their bags and gift bags, returning the final time with the car seat that Harry placed their daughter into, strapping her in carefully, Gina checking the straps before she allowed them to leave.

“Thank you for everything,” Harry said as he gave her a hug, kissing her cheek. “Sorry I went a bit crazy there for a while-“

“Don’t even apologise, nothing I haven’t seen before or a hundred times worse,” Gina laughed, hugging Louis now. “You two take care of that perfect little girl, and live a long and happy life together, okay?”

“We will, thank you,” Louis said, hooking the car seat in the crook of his elbow, Harry too sore to contemplate carrying that weight at the moment. They waved bye to the other staff, stopping countless times for people to coo over Ella, congratulating them and telling them how beautiful she was. Louis was a hugely proud father, and carried her with pride, Harry shuffling along behind, wincing with every step.

Harry gingerly lowered himself into the seat while Louis fixed the car seat in place next to him. Harry had been insistent on joining Ella in the backseat for her first car ride, although Louis had assured him she would sleep through the entire thing.

“It doesn’t matter, Louis,” Harry argued back in exasperation. “I know that I did it, and I can tell her when she’s older that I was with her all the way home. It means something to me.” Louis had nodded and kissed his boyfriend, smiling back at them both before he started the engine. They didn’t take long to arrive home, and Louis laughed, Harry and Ella both asleep now as he pulled up on the driveway.

“Harry, love, we’re home, wakey wakey.” Harry stirred as Louis shook his arm, gasping as he looked over to his sleeping daughter, who, as Louis had predicted, was still sound asleep. “Careful, love.” Louis helped Harry out of the car, and Harry waited while Louis unhooked the car seat, the pair holding hands as they walked up the path together. Harry got Louis’ keys out of his pocket, ignoring Louis’ smirk as he did so, slotting the key into the lock.

Instead of moving forwards, Louis just stood, staring inside, the car seat in one hand, Harry in the other.

“Lou? You alright?” Harry asked, turning to his boyfriend, puzzled at the expression on his face.

“Yeah, just, uh, god this sounds silly...”

“I’m sure it’s not, tell me, love,” Harry encouraged, squeezing Louis’ hand lightly.

“Well. I’ve got my own family, Haz. You, me and Ella, we’re a family. I’ve always wanted children, to be a dad, and you’ve given me that. I can’t tell you how much this means to me, how much I love you, both of you. Just- thank you.”

“I love you too, we both do,” Harry whispered back, overcome with emotion at Louis’ words. “I thought I was going to lose my baby girl, Lou, but you gave her back to me, and more. You gave me love, a family, a home, when I had nothing at all. You gave me everything. I will never be able to thank you enough for what you’ve done for me.”

“Just… marry me. That’s all I want. Marry me, be mine, I want you and Ella to be mine forever.”

Harry just gaped at Louis, unable to believe this was happening right now, in the doorway of his home, their newborn daughter at their side.

“Harry, I want to marry you. Please, when everything else is sorted, let’s get married, just us and Ella. Let’s be a family, for real. Please?”

“Yes, Louis, it’s always yes. Oh my god, we’re getting married. I got my happy ever after.” He turned and grabbed Louis’ cheeks, kissing him firmly, their eyes shining with love and happiness. “I love you, so much, you have no idea.”

“I think I do,” Louis said, kissing Harry again and looking down at their sleeping daughter. “Let’s go home, love. Let me bring you home.”

And together, they held hands, stepping into their home for the first time as family of three, their future shining brightly, everything either of them had ever wanted right there in their arms, their daughter, their home, their love.


	8. Epilogue

**One Year Later**

“Lou, where did you put the candle I got the other day?” Harry called out, watching with fond eyes through the window as Louis stood in the garden and threw their excited daughter into the air, catching her as she made a loud squeal. He settled her on his hip and together they walked across the patio and into the large kitchen. Louis kissed Harry quickly and rifled through a drawer to one end of the counter, emerging victorious with a sparkly pink ‘1’ candle in his hand.

“And who might this be for?” he teased, wafting it about in front of Ella’s face, the little girl bashing her hands together in excitement, babbling away to herself, whimpering as Louis passed it to Harry who took it with a kiss. “Sorry love, you get it later when everyone is here for your party!”

“Dadadadada,” she mumbled, sticking her fingers into her mouth as Harry reached for her, holding her close and nuzzling his face into her neck for a second, making her giggle again.

“That’s right, I’m your dada,” Harry said proudly, kissing her chubby cheek and brushing her dark curls away from her face. “Do you want to get her ready in a sec, Lou? I think people will start arriving shortly, and I want her to look party ready. What are you wearing, by the way?”

“Um, that shirt you got me the other day, and my denim shorts,” Louis replied, Harry nodding, pleased with the selection. “You look beautiful, Haz.” Harry bent down and sat Ella on the floor as Louis approached, their hands settling on each other’s waists as they looked down at their daughter, unsteadily getting to her feet and swaying, clutching on to Louis’ calf for support as she grinned up at them.

“I love you, Lou,” Harry whispered, pecking his lips softly. “I can’t believe our little girl is one, where’s this year gone?”

“No idea,” Louis said, sighing deeply. “It’s gone too quickly, that’s for sure. But it has been the happiest year of my life, so there is that.” Harry chuckled and nodded, squeezing Louis’ hip before he stepped away. “Alright, alright, let’s go, little lady.” He swooped down and scooped up Ella, heading for the doorway. “Wave bye to Daddy, we’ve got to go and get your best frock on, it’s party time!”

Harry grinned and waved as Louis and Ella wandered off upstairs, and he looked around their kitchen with happy eyes. They’d decided a few months after Ella was born that they wanted their own home, somewhere not associated with the memories of Louis’ former marriage, and they had spotted their dream house just a few weeks later. Things moved quickly, and by the time Ella was seven months old, they’d bought their first home and were now settled and happy, Harry thrilled to be throwing his daughter a small birthday party to celebrate turning one.

The other thing that had changed dramatically was that Louis and Harry had gotten married. There was no contest to Louis and Jess’ divorce, and things were over quite quickly, to the relief of both parties. There were no hard feelings, the pair still in contact as Jess loved to visit Ella, and neither Harry or Louis wanted to lose her friendship. They’d married quickly and quietly when Ella just turned ten months, a small wedding in a registry office attended by Louis’ parents, and a few of their closest friends. They didn’t want a fuss, they just wanted the commitment of marriage, and for Harry to be a Tomlinson like his husband and daughter.

The doorbell rang shortly after Harry slid the cake back into the fridge, and he darted through the house, grinning at Louis’ family who were on the other side. He wrapped up Jay in a hug before encouraging the family to come in and wander through to the garden, where the party would be taking place given the nice weather.

“And where’s my granddaughter?” Jay asked, eyes roaming around as if the little girl might appear from behind a tree or something, much to Harry’s amusement.

“Right here!” Louis called, emerging through the patio doors, a smiling Ella in his arms. He set the baby down and Jay crouched down, arms open as Ella toddled towards her, everyone cheering at her steps. She’d started walking a few weeks ago, and was getting more steady now, and Harry and Louis couldn’t be prouder of her. “Yay, clever girl!”

Jay was holding Ella now, kissing her cheek and admiring the pretty lemon coloured dress Harry had bought specially for this occasion, and Louis’ sisters were fussing over their niece, all of them loving the little girl to bits, and often popping in after school to see her and Harry while Louis was at work. Harry had returned to college for the special classes his professors had arranged while he was still pregnant, and Harry was excelling.

He was attempting to get his nursery nurse qualifications now, and Louis often spent hours after work helping Harry study for his impending exams, knowing how much success meant to the man. At the moment, Louis was the only one financially supporting their household, something he knew played heavily on Harry’s mind but he was happy to do so, and loved providing for his family. He knew Harry was keen to return to work, to bring some more income in, but Louis had insisted several times that if Harry wanted to wait to work until Ella started school, that was fine by him. Harry wasn’t sure how he’d gotten so lucky.

The party was in full swing an hour later. Their friends, Niall, Liam and Zayn had arrived bearing colourful cards and gifts for the little girl, taking it in turns to hold and cuddle her, Liam sitting patiently with her on his knee at the table as she banged some plastic cups around, trying to balance them as Niall was showing her.

“Oh, Haz, Jess text me earlier,” Louis said, kissing the top of his husband’s head. Harry was sat between his legs, resting against Louis’ chest as their family and friends ate and drank around them, no need to worry about Ella for a while as she was more than entertained by everyone else for a while. It was nice to take a few moments just for them.

“Oh, yeah? Is she alright?” Harry asked, worrying about his friend.

“She is, yeah. She said they’re finding out the sex of the baby next week, I can’t believe she’s nearly 20 weeks already. Hang on, she sent me a photo of her bump...” Louis pulled out his phone and scrolled through the seemingly hundreds of pictures of Ella and Harry before he arrived at one of Jess proudly cradling a small bump, a wide smile on her face. “Here you go.”

Harry took the phone and grinned at it, so happy for his friend. “She looks amazing. I’m so happy her and Ricky are expecting, she deserves to be a Mum. And it’ll be nice for Ella to have a friend to play with, she loves nursery but it’s not the same as having a friend come to play.” Louis nodded.

While it was still sometimes strange to see his ex-wife happy with someone else, and expecting their baby, Louis was just grateful she was getting the chance to be a mother herself now. He still felt pangs of guilt over what had happened, how he’d fallen in love with Harry while married to her, but things had a funny way of working themselves out. He’d got a husband and daughter he adored more than anything, and she’d found a new man to make her smile, and was now creating her own family. Louis wondered sometimes if fate had played a part in everything, if he and Jess weren’t destined to have a child of their own as he was meant to be with Harry, that they were meant to have Ella, and be happy together, the three of them.

“Want to do some presents before we do the cake?” Louis asked, and Harry nodded. They walked over to the table where there were a few small gifts, pleased that their guests hadn’t gone over the top as neither man wanted their daughter to be spoiled, especially since she wouldn’t even remember this. “Um, guys, we’re going to do some presents, shall we sit on the grass?” Louis’ family and friends nodded, coming to pick up their gifts as Harry got Ella and settled her on the soft grass between his legs.

Everyone took it in turns to hand Ella her gifts, the baby often more fascinated with the wrapping paper than she was the colourful things inside, but Louis and Harry were overwhelmed by everyone’s generosity, thanking them as Louis jotted down on his iPhone who had given what so they could send thank you cards at a later date. One of Ella’s favourite presents was from Louis’ sisters Phoebe and Daisy, a colourful stuffed Elmer toy. She stuck the ear in her mouth and refused to let it go, cuddling it to her tummy when Harry tried to prise it from her grip.

“I don’t think she wants you to take that, love,” Louis laughed as Ella screeched loudly, bashing the toy on the floor for a second before hugging it again. “Thanks everyone, we really appreciate everything, we’ve got a very lucky little girl.”

“Please go and eat, there’s plenty of food and drinks in the kitchen, help yourselves!” Harry called out, and everyone started to disperse, music getting loud again as Zayn cranked up the volume. Harry and Louis just watched as Ella crawled around, batting at the piles of wrapping paper with her hands, grabbing bows and ribbons and clutching them in her little fists.

“Ba?”

“Bow, my love,” Harry said, laughing as he pressed one to Louis’ forehead, making his little girl laugh again. “Can you say bow?”

“Ba.”

“Good try,” he chuckled, kissing her chubby cheek and straightening her little headband Louis had chosen for her. “She’ll be talking before you know it, and I bet we won’t be able to shut her up,” he mused, watching as Louis helped her get her balance, tottering over to Niall with ribbon still wrapped around her little fist, Niall tying it into a bow on her wrist when she got to him.

“Well, with us as her parents, she never stood much hope of being quiet, did she?” Louis laughed as Harry prodded his side, a look of indignation flashing across his face before he laughed too, shrugging as he realised Louis was right. “Love you, Haz.” They kissed softly for a few seconds until the ‘Ewwww, more kissing!” from Louis’ youngest siblings broke them apart, the pair pressing their foreheads together for a second, smiling secretly at each other.

“I think it’s time for the cake, babe,” Harry said, getting to his feet and holding out his hands for Louis to take, pulling his husband up off the grass. “Come on, come and help me with it then we can bring it out here.” Louis nodded and followed Harry into the kitchen. He watched as Harry took out the cake, and they both admired it, snapping a few photos before Harry stuck in the candle and Louis grabbed a lighter from the top of the fridge.

“Haz, go and get Ella, I’ll bring the cake out.” Harry nodded and wandered back outside, stealing his daughter back from Dan, and he called everyone over as Louis came through the door, the candle shining brightly despite the sunny day. Ella wriggled in Harry’s grasp, trying to get to the cake but he laughed and held her tightly.

“Hang on sweetheart, we have to sing to you first, then we can have cake!” She babbled and clapped her hands again, and the gathered friends and family began to sing, the little girl’s eyes shining as she tried to join in. Carefully, Harry stepped over to the cake, holding Ella’s hands back as he counted down and blew out the flame, everyone cheering and clapping despite Ella’s confusion over where the fire had gone.

“Jay, can you take her while I cut the cake?” Jay nodded and stole Ella away again as Harry followed Louis into the kitchen. They worked easily together, Harry slicing up the cake and Louis putting them onto paper plates that Liam and Zayn began to run inside to pass around to people. Both were grateful to their friends for the help, and Harry cut off a tiny slither than he wanted to give to Ella, certain that she needed some of her own cake on her birthday.

He went back to find Louis sat on their bench near the bottom of the garden, Ella on his thigh, laying sleepily against her papa’s chest. Harry smiled and sat down next to them, laying the plate down on his leg as he reached across and stroked her cheek. Her eyes lit up and she woke up slightly when she spotted the cake, and Harry broke off a piece, putting it between his fingertips.

“You want some cake? Yummy!” He pushed it between her lips, watching her attempt to eat it, quickly opening her mouth for some more once she’d swallowed that piece.

“Daddy cooks good cake, doesn’t he love? Wait until you’re a big girl and get to eat all of Daddy’s lovely cooking like I do, it’s all so yummy, and we’re lucky to have him!”

“Oh, Lou,” Harry said, blushing slightly at his husband’s compliments. “You work hard for us, the least I can do is make sure you have a good meal at the end of a hard day.”

“Proper little house husband, you are,” Louis teased, leaning in to kiss Harry as Ella swallowed her last piece of cake, pouting comically when she realised it was all gone. “But I love it, and we love you. Yes we do!” Harry leaned in and the pair of them cuddled up for a moment, Ella snuggling back against Louis, clearly tired. Their family and friends started to gather together and leave, knowing the pair would need to get the birthday girl to bed before she got overtired and grumpy, a lot like Louis in that respect.

“Thanks for coming,” Harry said, hugging everyone since Louis didn’t want to move and jostle his daughter awake just yet.

“Our pleasure, thank you for having us,” Jay said, kissing Ella’s cheek gently where she slept on her Papa. “I’ll call you tomorrow, Lou?”

“Sure, Mum,” he said, kissing her cheek before he watched his family cross the grass. Finally, Harry, Louis and Ella were alone, looking up at the beautiful sunset in the sky, their house lit up beautifully in the pinky sky. Balloons, ribbon and toys were scattered across the lawn, although Niall and Liam had cleared away any of the food debris so there’d be no problems with that, making Harry feel very grateful for his friends.

“What a great party,” Louis said softly, reaching for Harry’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “I still can’t get my head around the fact our daughter is one, Haz.” His other hand was around Ella’s back, holding her still, and he moved it gently up and down, knowing how much she loved having her back stroked, even while she slept. “Best year ever, though.”

“Yeah, I know. Same for me. Got a daughter, got a husband, got a house...” He shifted slightly and looked at Louis, about to say something more when Louis interrupted him.

“I really love this place, you know,” Louis said, nodding towards the house. “A proper family home. Perfect for the three of us.”

Harry took a deep breath and realised Louis had unwittingly given him the perfect segue. “No, it’s not.”

Louis frowned and stared at Harry, confusion in his eyes. “What do you mean? I thought you loved this house, you said it’s-“

“No, Lou. I do. But it’s not perfect for the three of us.” Harry smiled softly, his heart racing his chest as he continued, wanting to push away all of Louis’ confusion. “It’s perfect for the four of us.”

“Four of us? What are you...” Louis trailed off, his eyes widening as he realised what Harry had said, and he leaned forwards, still holding on tightly to Ella. “No way, Harry. You’re not... are you...?”

Harry grinned and nodded, pressing the hand that was holding his own against his still-flat belly, aware it wouldn’t stay flat for much longer. “I’m pregnant, Louis. We’re having a baby.” Louis started to cry straight away, and Harry was shocked by the sudden outpouring of emotion. He shuffled over and wrapped Louis up in a hug, letting his husband cry into his shoulder until the sobs subsided, and Louis leaned back, wiping at his eyes with his hand.

“Lou, I’m sorry, I thought-“

“No, shit, oh my god, Harry. We’re having a baby, this is the best news in the whole world, I promise. I know I’m a daddy, I am, I’ve got Ella and she’s the most wonderful daughter I could have ever asked for but... god, Haz, this is  _ our _ baby. You and me, us. Just... this is everything I ever wanted.”

Harry grinned and nodded, feeling exactly the same. Louis was Ella’s father in every way, there was no doubt in that. The two were incredibly close, Ella always excited to see Louis’ car pull up on the driveway, and no biology could ever get in the way of the love they had for each other. Louis was in the process of adopting her as well, but despite that, Harry was so excited to give Louis a biological child, and to be pregnant again.

“Me too, Lou. I only found out a couple of days ago, but I’ve got an appointment next week, if you want to come with me?”

“Of course I do,” Louis rushed to say, leaning forward to kiss Harry’s lips roughly. “God, you’re pregnant, Harry. Pregnant with my baby. Just...” He reached out and settled his hand on Harry’s tummy, already imagining how good Harry would look pregnant again. “I can’t wait to see your belly all big again, loved how sexy you look when you’re pregnant...”

“Hey, don’t get carried away,” Harry laughed as Louis started to rub circles against his flat stomach. “I’m so happy, though, Lou. I know we haven’t exactly been trying, but I know we weren’t careful either so... yeah, I’m so happy you’re happy.” Ella started to stir then, making murmuring noises and Louis carefully got to his feet, cradling his daughter to his chest. “Let’s get her to bed or she’ll never settle.”

“Yeah, alright.” They held hands as they walked across the grass, leaving everything out to be tidied away in the morning. Louis stopped on the patio for a moment, his daughter in one arm, Harry held by the other hand. “Harry, just... thank you. For giving me everything I always wanted... my own family. I love you, all of you so much.”

Tears glistened in Harry’s eyes as Louis’ words settled in, and he kissed his husband softly, their daughter between them, new life growing inside Harry’s belly again. “You’re my happy ever after, Lou. I love you. We  _ all  _ love you.”

And right there in his home, his children and husband by his side, Louis had never felt more loved. He had everything he ever wanted, and more. His life was perfect.


End file.
